Sussex v Kent @ Hove

[CHAPPERS]

You can get 7/1 on Durham winning the totepsort div 2 title. We have to lose to YOrks who are shit and they havge to beat Warks for it to happen but I reckon 7's ain't bad.....

 

[Basil Fawlty]

Butch will never i will repeat never play for England again.

 

[Brixtaan]

Where's Brixtaaan?

Here, and don't come looking for a fight,i'm not in the mood,in fact i'm still so angry at my county that only Slurrey going down will cheer me up.

4 times this season
I give up, well done Shittssex.

 

[Hydro Driven]

 

[Lord Bracknell]

Surrey are straight up f***ed

Midds 353/4 - if they get to 400 without losing another wicket and declare Middlesex will need 3 wickets or if Midds make 450 an Surrey don't get to 450 without losing more than 6 wickets within 130 over then Surrey go down or if Middlesex declare now and take 9 or more wickets before close tomorrow or if the game is a wash out - Surrey would be down for sure then. Of course Surrey could just bowl Middlesex out for under 400 then score 200/0 declare and win and they'd be safe.

or something like that

The BBC's version at close of play:-

Surrey stand on the brink of relegation in the County Championship after being outplayed by Middlesex on day one of their match at The Oval.

The visitors racked up 404-5 declared with Scott Styris making 100 not out and Ed Joyce 90. Surrey then made a faltering reply to end the day on 59-2.

Needing to win the game and take more bonus points than Middlesex to survive, Surrey gained just one bowling point.

That left them with the task of scoring 400 whilst losing two wickets or less.

If they somehow achieve the virtually impossible, Middlesex would be relegated instead.

Surrey's reply got off to the worse possible start when Mark Butcher (five) was run out by Jamie Dalrymple's throw from backward point in the third over and Rikki Clarke played all round a straight one from Styris for 22.

Mark Ramprakash, once of Middlesex, and Scott Newman batted out the last few over.

But they need to put on a further 341 for the third wicket for Surrey to have any hope of surviving.

After winning the toss Middlesex's first aim was to gain maximum batting points, which they did with the minimum of fuss thanks to Styris, Joyce and captain Ben Hutton, who contributed 79.

They were aided by some woeful bowling from Surrey, whose new coach Alan Butcher has much to work on.

Middlesex 404-5d v Surrey 59-2

 

[Bwian]

Wonder what he's thinking?

 

[Pevenseagull]

The BBC's version at close of play:-

Surrey stand on the brink of relegation in the County Championship after being outplayed by Middlesex on day one of their match at The Oval.

The visitors racked up 404-5 declared with Scott Styris making 100 not out and Ed Joyce 90. Surrey then made a faltering reply to end the day on 59-2.

Needing to win the game and take more bonus points than Middlesex to survive, Surrey gained just one bowling point.

That left them with the task of scoring 400 whilst losing two wickets or less.

If they somehow achieve the virtually impossible, Middlesex would be relegated instead.

Surrey's reply got off to the worse possible start when Mark Butcher (five) was run out by Jamie Dalrymple's throw from backward point in the third over and Rikki Clarke played all round a straight one from Styris for 22.

Mark Ramprakash, once of Middlesex, and Scott Newman batted out the last few over.

But they need to put on a further 341 for the third wicket for Surrey to have any hope of surviving.

After winning the toss Middlesex's first aim was to gain maximum batting points, which they did with the minimum of fuss thanks to Styris, Joyce and captain Ben Hutton, who contributed 79.

They were aided by some woeful bowling from Surrey, whose new coach Alan Butcher has much to work on.

Middlesex 404-5d v Surrey 59-2

it's good to see the BBC clarify my muddy thoughts, in fairness they're paid to do it, have the info and things were a good deal clearer by the time they stepped in

450 plus/2 gives them a very slim chance it is then



........and I love the FACT that they had an institutional dig at SU 'Bertie Big Bollocks' RREY being FARKING PONY

them scenes, they're marvellous they are


run out

.............. circumstances

............ I'd love to have seen that

 

[Shropshire Seagull]

run out as well

a bit stoopid that

I remember batting with Hoppo for Barcombe Vs Tenterden about 10 years ago - he pulled the ball to deepish backward square leg so I called him for a run (I was going to the danger end). I got in, but the fielder threw to the bowlers end with a direct hit. Happens his dad (Gerry) was Ump and said "Out son, next time run yer bat in".

Not a great claim to fame I know ....

 

[Pevenseagull]

Yardy stolling out to the middle with his bat and an anchor

good boy

a sprightly 3 from 57 balls


the man for the occassion - NONE SHALL PASS


good work

 

[Pevenseagull]

YARDY'S BATTING MASTERCLASS


how to play every delivery - It's child's play a pictorial essay on the finer arts of batting


THE PROBING LINE OUTSIDE OFF STUMP

Glenda 'knocking on and accident prone' McGrath has somehow built a reputation as the worlds finest pace bowler with his off target deliveries, typically only one in 20 is actually on the stumps

ergo NEGATE THE FUCKER

THE YORKER


Simple, keep you stumps covered

THE BOUNCER

You can't be Bowled out - cover your stumps and wait for the odd bad ball - again, keep it simple

THE 'SLOWER BALL'

They can mix it up all they like, don't get suckered. A straight bat will soon frustrate them into trying another approach

THE BEAMER

A wanker's delivery, as long as you've got the right kit this will just ping off. Grow a pair, it won't hurt. Try to get out of the way and you risk losing any chance of another England cap (particularly if it ends out to be a tame full toss and you duck under it)

the below figure shows the perfect stance for dealing with this type of delivery:

SPIN, ANY KIND OF SPIN

Some say pad up, some crazy fuckers say sweep, STAY CLOSE TO THE WICKET, STAY OVER THE BALL AND TAP IT INTO THE DECK

Simple

I love that man (not in a homosexual way)


He's gonna play for England one day

 

[CHAPPERS]

That is CLASS, Mr King.

CLASS.

 

[Pevenseagull]

much more like it at Hove this morning

Yardy and Ambrose steadily knocking off the runs, now looking much more respectable after the debacle that was the openers

102/2


meanwhile at Surrey, Newman and Ramps are continuing to delay the inevitable 84/2

 

[Moshe Gariani]

like the masterclass...

at the risk of being a PRICK, things have got off to a decent start this morning down at Hove - Yards has just unleashed a flurry of boundaries and the 100 has come up without mishap...

hopefully the mist will burn off and our boys can bat to a strong position by the close...

ps
Newman and Runforcash only need to add another 316 for Slurry to have a chance of avoiding the drop... "DOWN with the Palace!"

 

[Moshe Gariani]

good timing there pev... not my fault if we lose a wicket now!

 

[CHAPPERS]

Piers is there today.

The swine.

 

[CHAPPERS]

Pity poor Hampshire but nice one Shane, taht Fulton is a right DICKHEAD.

Shane Warne is furious at Kent captain Dave Fulton after his Hampshire side were denied a chance of winning the County Championship title.
Nottinghamshire's 214-run win against Kent last weekend gave them the crown.

Fulton agreed to chase an unlikely 420 runs in 70 overs and then watched as his team were bowled out.

"I think that is one of the dumbest things I have ever seen," said Warne, whose side are playing Notts in what could have been a title decider.

Hampshire began their final match of the season against Notts on Wednesday, knowing they were only playing for second.

"I thought David Fulton actually understood the game, but he must dislike us totally to go and hand someone the championship like that," claimed the Australian.

"It came from a guy who is meant to know a little bit about the game. He showed everyone that it is just bravado, because he has absolutely no idea what is going on.

"I am all for trying to win every game. But when it is 99.5% against you have to start saying, 'Is that bringing the game into disrepute?'

"I think it is, because Kent had absolutely no chance of winning that game.

"It has put a real dampener on what could and should have been a fantastic match here between the two best teams in the country to finish a great summer and I hope something is done about it."

Kent have yet to respond to Warne's comments.

Speaking immediately after the match against Notts, Fulton defended his decision by saying that Kent had to try and win the game to preserve their own hopes of winning the title.

"It was a huge long-shot, but if we'd played out a draw that would have been us out of the Championship race.

"With the greatest of respect to Hampshire and Sussex, I don't care too much about them. I care about this club, these fans and bringing the Championship back," he told BBC Kent.


Kent are just bitter that they are so shit innit. I really hope we STUFF if up 'em in this game now.

 

[Moshe Gariani]

Fulton's a wanker...

f*** it, Yards gone... come on Grizz

 

[Highfields Seagull]

Ambrose out as well.

 

[Moshe Gariani]

Ambrose out as well.

SAKE...

well, fingers crossed for a successful counterattack from the strokemakers to come

i blame pevenseagull

 

[Pevenseagull]

DOH DOH DOH DOH DOH