Stoke fanzine wants to know all about us...

[Wardy]

Tell us a bit about your team this season– star players, prima donnas, shit haircuts etc, etc…

Few good players our two french wingers standout most.

“It’s better to win the Play Offs at the Millenium Stadium than actually win the title”. Discuss.

Yes and no. Yes it is a great day out. No you fingers take months to recover.

And what do BHA fans think of Big Chris Iwelumo?

Thank f*** hes gone.

What style of play can we expect to see from you at The Brit?

Open attacking football, with the defence trying to keep up.

Your away support is usually decent for the numbers you get at home, isn’t it?

A lot of fans refuse or just do not like going to the Withdean, so go to away games instead. Having said that even when we get a new ground we will still take a fair few away.

Mark McGhee. You rate him?

Yep a great manager.

……and if so, aren’t you slightly worried that you worship someone who everyone else thinks is a twat?

Nope he is still learning and has made a few mistakes in the past. I will judge him on what he does for us, not what he did before hand.

Apart from Normacot and Anchor Road Athletic, you’re the only club I know named after two separate areas. How come?

We all have split personalities.

Describe your chairman in 10 words.

A true Albion fan and legend. Who loves this club.

And what’s happening with Farmer?

Ask that fat twat John Prescot

What’s the independent fan culture like at Brighton eg. Fanzines, supporters clubs, website etc.

We have one of the most used football websites in the world. Due to that fanzines are normaly out of date when printed.

Over twenty quid to sit in an athletics stadium. Aren’t Brighton taking the piss?

Even at that price we are losing money each week. At lease we are not charging £30 like Palarse are to us.

We have ‘Delilah’. What’s your anthem and why?

Good Old Sussex By The Sea.

Are you pissed off with being the apparent plaything of Londoners who go on f****** endlessly about popping down to Brighton for the weekend?

If I lived in London I would come to Brighton to get away aswell.

“And Smith must score”. Tell me your thoughts when he didn’t.

f***, f***, f***, f*** followed by well thats Brighton for you.

Which areas do you draw your support from apart from Brighton and Hove?

As the only league club in Sussex we draw support from all over.

What are your thoughts about Stoke-on-Trent, Stoke City, Stoke fans?

Personally I have no feelings bad or good either way. Though I know a few people that have had a few run ins with your "crew" in the past.

‘Brighton could be a massive club’. Discuss.

Give us Falmer and watch us fly.

Tell us about your Coca Cola Kid.

Was brought as an investment. Still as a lot to learn but will be a good player in a few years.

How do you think you’ll do this season?

I will take 20th now please.

….and your prediction for today is…[/]

A well thought out draw.

 

[Ex Shelton Seagull]

Tell us a bit about your team this season– star players, prima donnas, shit haircuts etc, etc…

In goal we usually have the former Dutch Marine Michel Kuipers, due to him being injured we now have either Wayne Henderson or Alan Blayney both good on-loan goalies. The rock at the centre of defence is Guy Butters. Put up for sale on an internet auction site a couple of years ago he has gone on to become a true legend. This season he’s partnered by the excellent Paul McShane who’s on loan from Man Utd. In central midfield we usually have Richard Carpenter, an antiques buff who lived in a travellers camp for a while and can belt in a free-kic, and Dean Hammond our (sometime) goal scoring attacking midfielder. Up front there’s Leon Knight who I believe most opposition fans are well aware of, partnered by either Kazim-Richards (courtesy of the Coca-Cola corporation) or Argie front man, Federico Turienzo. It’s on the wings where the real excitement lies. We got two French lads, Sebastien Carole and Alexandre Frutos, from Monaco and Metz respectively. Both look like great attacking midfielders. If you’re still playing Marlon Broomes and Lewis Buxton we could be in for a good afternoon.

“It’s better to win the Play Offs at the Millenium Stadium than actually win the title”. Discuss.

I was living in Stoke at the time of our two championship triumphs so I never really got to experience them up close. I had to listen to the Div 2 celebrations at Withdean on a mobile phone whilst walking back from one of the dullest games I’ve ever witnessed (Stoke vs Wrexham). I was fully present and correct for the play-off triumph and it was an amazing day. Stitching up 35,000 country bumpkins who had been giving it the biggun all day was something to be treasured. The memory of the Bristol banner that read “better luck next year Brighton” fluttering in the wind whilst our players cavorted around the pitch is one that never fails to raise a chuckle.

And what do BHA fans think of Big Chris Iwelumo?

Big Chris! I was dead excited when we signed him in 2004 because I was well aware of his cult status in Stoke. He belted in 30 yarder against Chesterfield on his debut and won the penalty that got us promoted. He just isn’t Championship standard though, and when he asked for help moving down here I was glad we said no. With the property prices around here being what they are we could have purchased an entire team for the price of a semi detached. The best thing he ever did when he was here was sport a Lionel Ritchie afro for one game only. He abandoned it the next week probably due to the amount of stick he got for it.

What style of play can we expect to see from you at The Brit?

Well last year we were all about digging out the victories through belting the ball up to Adam Virgo. This season we’ve started to play a much more attractive passing game with emphasis on working play through the wings. That said, if we go a goal down we tend to resort to panic hoofing which isn’t much use when your main striker is 5 foot 4.

Your away support is usually decent for the numbers you get at home, isn’t it?

Yeah, I think the fact that we only played away games for two seasons at the Pissfield encouraged more people to go and watch us away from home. Some people prefer to miss home games at Withdean and go along to the away games instead.

Mark McGhee. You rate him?

Yes. Yes I do. The man engineered a promotion and then kept us in this division against all the odds. Turned Adam Virgo from being a full back with poor distribution skills on the verge of a move to Exeter City, into a top goalscoring stiker and central defender who cost Celtic 1.5 million. I can forgive his somewhat eccentric interpretation of where players can play due to the fact that it seems to work most of the time.

……and if so, aren’t you slightly worried that you worship someone who everyone else thinks is a twat?

We can change him. There is a bit of excitement in having a relationship with someone other people think is a bad sort. You know, friends telling you it’ll all end in tears, sob stories from jilted lovers, but you still possess an unshakeable belief that it’ll be different for you. Maybe it will, maybe it won’t but it’s the not knowing that keeps you on your toes.

Apart from Normacot and Anchor Road Athletic, you’re the only club I know named after two separate areas. How come?

Well Brighton AND Hove is a city you know. That’s its name. Thank God we do have Brighton in the title. I really wouldn’t want us to be called Hove Albion and therefore sharing our name with the land of the dead and being called Hove Actually FC.

Describe your chairman in 10 words.

Bearded, bespectacled, advertising, potless, passionate, long suffering, hard working, legend

Give us the lowdown on all the troubles at BHA in the past decade.

Pull up a chair and I’ll begin. Back in the early nineties we were in serious financial trouble, we were nearly declared bankrupt on several occasions and just when things looked really bad a DIY tycoon, Bill Archer, rolled up on the scene and paid £56.25p for the club. In came a failed local MP, David Bellotti, who had a face that just needed to be punched. A couple of years later they flogged the ground for a pittance and try and groundshare with Portsmouth. Protests, pitch invasions, death threats and various other events ensued. We finished 23 out of 24 in Div 3 after a 1-1 draw with Hereford that sent them down instead. 2 god awful years playing in the compost heap in the garden of England followed, along with another 23rd place finish in Div 3. Since 1999 we’ve played at the one and only Withdean stadium, a ground that has seen two championships and a play-off triumph. The biggest result in our history still awaits us.

And what’s happening with Farmer?

By the time of our game we will have found out the result we’ve been waiting for since 1997. A new home for our club. This really is life or death stuff for the club. Check our faces to get an idea of what the result was.

What’s the independent fan culture like at Brighton eg. Fanzines, supporters clubs, website etc.

During the war (1995-1997) fanzines played a critical part in the protests against the board. During our Gillingham exile we had some of the best fanzines in the country in my opinion. Since the move to Withdean, coupled with the rise of the internet, we now have barely a thing. North Stand Chat is the main source of rumours, gossip and general messageboard bitchiness. Check out North Stand Polls for the answers to questions like “would you rather shag an 80 year old woman or a donkey?”

Over twenty quid to sit in an athletics stadium. Aren’t Brighton taking the piss?

Yeah just a bit. Still it’s a unique venue. The tree lined stand, the cricket style atmosphere, the open to the elements feel of the place, the friendly train drivers hooting their horns as they go past. I’ll miss all that if we get Falmer. Hang on, no I won’t. By the time you visit in May you’ll be housed in an all new stand at the other end of the ground. Still no roof and the view is even worse than the one you had before. Enjoy!

We have ‘Delilah’. What’s your anthem and why?

The rousing, prom band favourite, “Good old Sussex by the sea”. A real belter of a song when sung with gusto after going a goal up. I think it’s a bit better than a song about breaking into a woman’s house and sticking your knob in her hand.

Are you pissed off with being the apparent plaything of Londoners who go on f****** endlessly about popping down to Brighton for the weekend?

As long as they give us their money I don’t mind ‘em too much. It’s the ones who buy second homes down here and push up the prices for us local types that annoy me. That said I did read a supremely patronising piece in the Guardian (what a surprise) whilst the Labour party conference was in town that did get my goat a bit.

I’ve got 24 hours in your city. Tell me where to eat, sleep, drink, shop, throw up, etc

Get a fry up at Divalls opposite the station, quality grease at a good price. Go shopping round the North Laines for “bohemian” items and second hand records. Of an evening go for something to eat and drink round the Lanes or pop along to Preston Street for a wide variety of restaurants. If you want to witness “drunken high street shame” then go to West Street for a fight and a cheap bird. Go along the seafront for a club or go to the strip joint opposite the Pavillion. It could have full nudity next year!

…You have a comedy rivalry with Palace. How come?

Well I can assure you it isn’t comedy for us! All started back in the mid 70’s and a little disagreement between Palace fans and our then manager Alan Mullery. Was allowed to grow during the 80’s and reached a high point when referee Kelvin Morton gave 5 penalties in 1 game (palace had 4 and scored 1!). After our troubles in the 90’s we had a long pause before we resumed hostilities in 2002. That dark day shall never be spoken of again. Palace are quite an easy side to dislike, the fact that we have to try and jockey for position among their rivals speaks volumes about what most supporters think of them.

“And Smith must score”. Tell me your thoughts when he didn’t.

It was a great save by Bailey. And Robinson should have shot.

Which areas do you draw your support from apart from Brighton and Hove?

We draw support from all over both Sussex counties. In the north Palace and other London clubs start to take over from Crawley onwards whilst worrying amounts of Pompey shirts can be witnessed when heading towards Bognor Regis. Chelski shirts have started to make increasing appearances but that’s true for most of the country I guess.

What are your thoughts about Stoke-on-Trent, Stoke City, Stoke fans?

I spent 3 years as a resident of Stoke-on-Trent whilst studying at Staffordshire University. Nights out at Valentinos/Creation, the Place and Brannigans, pints for £1.30p, kebabs at Zarkas, meat and potato pies from Wrights. Several of my friends hated the place but I always tried to stick up for it.
Popped along to the Brit quite a bit, I wasn’t going to go to Burslum even if they did have student discounts. Always enjoyed going to the derby games, I even went to Wembley for the Auto Windscreen triumph and the Cardiff for the play-off final. Guess that makes me more of a Stoke fan than some residents. I was always surprised by the amount of stick Stoke fans would give their own team, even if they were winning, you lot must be some of the toughest to please supporters in the land.

If you could have one of our players for your club which one would you have and why?

Think I’d pick Steve Simonsen. Our keepers are good but Simonsen is one of the best keepers in this division in my opinion.

‘Brighton could be a massive club’. Discuss.

I wouldn’t say massive, but if we get Falmer then I really feel that we could push on and establish ourselves as a top Championship/bottom half Premiership side. Much like your good selves.

Tell us about your Coca Cola Kid.

He’s “one for the future”. I really think he’ll come good, Bury fans said he was well worth a gamble, if he can be half as effective for us as David Nugent is for Preston then I think we’ll have landed ourselves a bargain. This is his first full season as a pro at this level and he’ll take time to get fully up to speed.

How do you think you’ll do this season?

15th/16th I reckon. Maybe a bit lower if injuries take their toll.

….and your prediction for today is…

I’d love to say we’re going to win but we always seem to do crap in Stoke. I’ll be as positive as possible and go for a 2-2 draw.

 

[Yorkie]

Over twenty quid to sit in an athletics stadium. Aren’t Brighton taking the piss?

Besides the fact that we have to rent the facilities from Brighton & Hove council, and are still making a loss, it does include rail, bus travel and/or parking facilities with a Park & Ride thrown in.
Brighton fans don't just live in Brighton and can travel up to 15 miles with the travel voucher included.
This was a mandatory part of us getting back to Brighton from exile.
There are no parking facilities near the stadium due to an exclusion zone.

 

[Tom Bombadil]

Re: Re: Stoke fanzine wants to know all about us...

Originally posted by samparish I’ve got 24 hours in your city. Tell me where to eat, sleep, drink, shop, throw up, etc

Eat at Donatello's, quality and affordable Italian (and sponsor us!)

Under no circumstances eat at Donatellos, it is the worst Italian restaurant in Brighton. Cheap and nasty and as authentic as a happy shopper microwave pizza.

 

[The Large One]

Mark McGhee. You rate him?

Yep. Quality bloke who talks to you like a human being, not a punter to be ripped off or ignored.

...and if so, aren’t you slightly worried that you worship someone who everyone else thinks is a twat?

People only think he's a twat because he had a habit of buggering off when a bigger cheque book was waved in front of him. It's hardly the sort of thing you could ever accuse Brighton of being able to do. As it transpires, he rather likes it here. Besides, if you worked / lived in Wolverhampton, Leicester, Reading or south London, wouldn't you want to change jobs sharpish?

 

[Publius Ovidius]

Fanzines:

You will have to ask Morris fro that one...he is the Fanzine king

 

[The Large One]

Fanzines:

You will have to ask Morris fro that one...he is the Fanzine king

He'll probably tell you after the game.

 

[westy]

ok then:

Tell us a bit about your team this season– star players, prima donnas, shit haircuts etc, etc… Star player: Seb Carloe and Leon Knight Knight Knight. Haircur, Kerrys ginger top is the best.

“It’s better to win the Play Offs at the Millenium Stadium than actually win the title”. Discuss. True, although not good 4 the nerves.

And what do BHA fans think of Big Chris Iwelumo? Did ok, then through out the toys when we wouldn’t buy him a house.

What style of play can we expect to see from you at The Brit? Pass and move, only the best.

Your away support is usually decent for the numbers you get at home, isn’t it? Very good away support, better than a lot of “big clubs”.

Mark McGhee. You rate him? Oh yes.

……and if so, aren’t you slightly worried that you worship someone who everyone else thinks is a twat? Nope. Anyone who can take us up with zero cash, keep us there, and then get us playing the passing game we have started to play DESERVES respect. Oh, and has raised a few million in transfer fees as well.

Apart from Normacot and Anchor Road Athletic, you’re the only club I know named after two separate areas. How come? Because u haven’t heard of Rushden and Diamonds?!!?

Describe your chairman in 10 words. Saved us from deaths door and Archer / Belloty. Thank you.

Give us the lowdown on all the troubles at BHA in the past decade. Sold the ground, had no ground. Found a site, locals complain, 5 year planning farce.

And what’s happening with Farmer? See above.

What’s the independent fan culture like at Brighton eg. Fanzines, supporters clubs, website etc. Good web presence.

Over twenty quid to sit in an athletics stadium. Aren’t Brighton taking the piss? How else are we goin t pay the wages??

We have ‘Delilah’. What’s your anthem and why? Sussex by the sea. Your work out why…

Are you pissed off with being the apparent plaything of Londoners who go on f****** endlessly about popping down to Brighton for the weekend? Nope, they give us their cash.

I’ve got 24 hours in your city. Tell me where to eat, sleep, drink, shop, throw up, etc

…You have a comedy rivalry with Palace. How come? Its not comedy, it goes waaaaaay back.

“And Smith must score”. Tell me your thoughts when he didn’t. My nan could have buried that chance, but you cant turn back the clock.

Which areas do you draw your support from apart from Brighton and Hove? Worthing, Eastbourne, crawley.

What are your thoughts about Stoke-on-Trent, Stoke City, Stoke fans? Horrible place, full of loons. Cheap chips though!!

If you could have one of our players for your club which one would you have and why? Ed de Goey for his porno tash/beard.

‘Brighton could be a massive club’. Discuss. They could, and will be given the ground.

Tell us about your Coca Cola Kid. Hes done ok. Looks like he has good potential given time.

How do you think you’ll do this season? Just above the drop zone, and that will be grand.. until we get the ground.

….and your prediction for today is…

2-1 to Albion!!

 

[The Large One]

What’s the independent fan culture like at Brighton eg. Fanzines, supporters clubs, website etc.

Sorry to sound arrogant, but when it comes to independent fan culture in the UK, we wrote the book. We had to fight tooth and nail to make sure our club was driven out of business by asset-strippers, and we are still fighting for our guaranteed survival.

And because we are still doing that, over 10 years after the Archer / Bellotti / Stanley nonsense, we find that fanzines just do not meet the requirements of keeping supporters informed. Largely, they are considered old hat down here.

The majority of our 'independent' fan culture is conducted through www.northstandchat.biz, a broad church of football chat, recipes, abuse, horse-racing tips, breast comparisons and campaigning.

So if you want banners, whistle-protests, Valentine's cards to the Deputy Prime Minister, 10,000-strong demonstrations, petitions, letter-writing or Early Day Motions in the House of Commons organised, give us a call.

 

[Ex-Staffs Gull]

Tell us a bit about your team this season– star players, prima donnas, shit haircuts etc, etc…


Paul McShane (loan from Man Utd) very solid young centre back.
Guy 'Tank' Butters - you'll never beat him .... MMmm
The French Connection. Fun to watch.
In fact the whole team can be stars or nightmares at times.


“It’s better to win the Play Offs at the Millenium Stadium than actually win the title”. Discuss.


Mad Stad was a great day out having won, but nobody will ever take away our back-2-back championships, it was good to do it both ways really.


And what do BHA fans think of Big Chris Iwelumo?


Can't speak for everyone, but he did a good job for us at the time and got us a very important penalty (and scored one against Swindon), but felt he let himself down by refusing the move in the summer because he wanted a house (allegedly).


What style of play can we expect to see from you at The Brit?


When we are 3 up, a defensive one, but until then free flowing, attacking 'hobbit' type football.


Your away support is usually decent for the numbers you get at home, isn’t it?


Duh, obvious really, we have a lot of people who travel, but a lot of us who live away are still fanatical about the club (well it's better than supporting Vale, Crewe or Stoke (no offence) as I live in Stoke.


Mark McGhee. You rate him?


Yes, but Earnest and A.R.S. (don't ask) may disagree (Lardy Jocko Clown' )


……and if so, aren’t you slightly worried that you worship someone who everyone else thinks is a twat?


No, You sacked somebody the rest of us thought was alright and then got in Tony 'Tosser' Pullis. And you hate Steve Cotterill who most of us think is alright. Dont know about your new guy.


Apart from Normacot and Anchor Road Athletic, you’re the only club I know named after two separate areas. How come?


Two towns Brighton and Hove, one community and one club.
Then again, your named after a City you don't play in ?


Describe your chairman in 10 words.


God to 99% Potless pillock accoring to Ernest and A.R.S. (don't ask)


Give us the lowdown on all the troubles at BHA in the past decade.


I haven't got the time to do it all. But corrupt chaiman buys club, appoints stooge, changes club rules, sells ground for personal profit, move us to Gillingham (like you playing your home games in Nottingham exept worse roads for us). Dick Knight current chiman buys club, brings us back to Brighton in only temporary location possible. 5 years later, 2 public enquiries and a lot of bat problems, we await 2 jags final descision.


And what’s happening with Farmer?


The Farmer at Falmer is a bit hacked off as he will lose his land.

See above


What’s the independent fan culture like at Brighton eg. Fanzines, supporters clubs, website etc.


No fanzines at the moment T.M.K. Although Richie Morris keeps threatening to start one


Over twenty quid to sit in an athletics stadium. Aren’t Brighton taking the piss?


No, we need to stay afloat and fill it at the moment, what should we do charge a fiver and pack for the Conference South ?


We have ‘Delilah’. What’s your anthem and why?

'Good old Sussex by the Sea' - obvious


Are you pissed off with being the apparent plaything of Londoners who go on f****** endlessly about popping down to Brighton for the weekend?


No, not really, it's unlikely to be a problem in Fenton, Chell, Tunstall, Longton etc is it though.


I’ve got 24 hours in your city. Tell me where to eat, sleep, drink, shop, throw up, etc





…You have a comedy rivalry with Palace. How come?


2 replay cup tie in the 70's, we was robbed by the thieving 'Sarf Lundonerrs' and then they followed us around the divisions for a while.


“And Smith must score”. Tell me your thoughts when he didn’t.


Bollocks....


Which areas do you draw your support from apart from Brighton and Hove?


Stoke :-0


What are your thoughts about Stoke-on-Trent, Stoke City, Stoke fans?

Stoke-On-Trent - nice in areas, but lets face eet ducks, it aint gonna win any prizes for best kept City (ies) ees eet. Plus the accent is a bit annoying.

Stoke City - Lucky to have a local authority that was willing to fund the majority of your ground. Dodgy directors.

Stoke Fans - I know a few and they are alright, but a bit fickle (aren't we all).


If you could have one of our players for your club which one would you have and why?


Urrmmm, I'll get back to you on that, most of the good ones , i.e. Commons and Thomas have left.


‘Brighton could be a massive club’. Discuss.


Brighton could be as big as Stoke at any rate (are they massive ?)


Tell us about your Coca Cola Kid.

No!!!! Hes our secret


How do you think you’ll do this season?

Struggle, but stay up , just.


….and your prediction for today is…

1-1


StaffsGull of Stoke-On-Trent