St Peters Church

[Gwylan]

And you bloody atheists can keep your hands of St Barts, it's one of the few decent Anglo-Catholic places left. Why can't you turn some of those dreadful low church buildings into clubs?

It's certainly a really high church. I remember going in there with a German friend who wouldn't believe me when I said it was a proddie place ...bloody Lutherans.

Would make a fantastic club though

 

[CHAPPERS]

My uncle remarried at St Barts. It's bloody impressive.

 

[Man of Harveys]

Biblically, I once went into Barts to pass time/shelter during a rain storm. The strongs winds were whistling around the high roof and it sounded fantastic, plus I was the only person in the place. Or so I thought: just as I was walking out, a posh old bloke's voice from a dark corner boomed at me (I swear on the blessed wounds of sister Bernadetta, I'm not making this up) "CAN YOU HEAR THE ANGELS SINGING?".

The stains in the underwear came out eventually.

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

That left-footer church at the bottom of Elm Grove is massive - that would make a good club.

There will be Percy Tantrums.

 

[robbied69]

World Cup Rules - Email to the gfs

Extremely important advice and recommendations to be passed on to wives,
girlfriends, fiances, mothers, sisters, daughters, etc. (to all women in
general) These rules are to be communicated prior to the World Cup in
June/July this year...

LIST OF RULES

1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the
newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World
Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you
fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be
totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.

2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without
any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will
lose it (your eye).

3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind,
as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me.
If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes
on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to
the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.

4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a
refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you
expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick
up
the baby that just fell from the second floor....it wont happen.

5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the
fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and
please do not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to
watch
the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and
6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.

6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams
is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, its only a game", or "don't worry,
they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me
angrier
and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about
football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only
lead to a break up or divorce.

7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to
me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the
halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying
"one" game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to
"spend
time together".

8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have
seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.

9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related
parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.

10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to
watch a game, we will be there in a flash.

11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as
important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but
you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something
we can all watch??", the reply will be: "Refer to Rule #2 of this list".

12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the
World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after
this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier
League, etc etc.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Regards,

Men of the World

 

[Brovion]

What's that got to do with St Peters?

 

[Juan Albion]

I think he knew that if he started a new thread with it he would get fixtured. And rightly so.

 

[D'Angelo Saxon]

MASS in Brixton is a great club. Played there a few times.

 

[Easy 10]

just as I was walking out, a posh old bloke's voice from a dark corner boomed at me (I swear on the blessed wounds of sister Bernadetta, I'm not making this up) "CAN YOU HEAR THE ANGELS SINGING?".

Did you reply :

"NOOO, NOOO"
"can you hear the angels singing ?"
NOOO, NOOO"
"can you hear the angels singing?"
"I can't hear a f***ing thing"
"NOOO OOOOH"

AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH



If not, you should have.

 

[The Large One]

St Augustine's Church at the bottom of Stanford Avenue/Florence Road is up for sale, and has been for a couple of years. That would make an awesome live venue, but the neighbours would doubtless complain.

 

[The Oldman]

I got married in St Barts

Another gem is St Pauls in West Street. Also Anglo Catholic.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

St Augustine's Church at the bottom of Stanford Avenue/Florence Road is up for sale, and has been for a couple of years. That would make an awesome live venue, but the neighbours would doubtless complain.

I got married there. Me daughter was christened there. If they did divorces, it'd be a one-stop-shop I tell's thee. It actually had a For Sale sign up a year or two back, tho it seems to be a functioning church again as far as one can tell i.e. there's not a constant stream of Young Professionals talking to a spiv in a suit of a Saturday morning.

BTW, surprised that nobody's mentioned that the Font & Firkin used to be a church. Shut down in the fifties or something and re-opened, what, mid-nineties?

 

[Easy 10]

I have drunk deeply from the altar at the Font. I was absolutely LEATHERED there for that Reading match on Sky on a Friday night a few years back. Stumbled forward and nearly took my face off on the side of a table.