SHould I give him some LETTUCE ?

[Meade's Ball]

That bird wants a friend. Or a dead lover with a fuckable beak and strings in its wings to be tugged for applause.
Feed it company.

 

[Muhammed - I’m hard - Bruce Lee]

eat a bargain bucket in front of him, every now and again gesture towards the drumstick then give him a 'knowing' look.

he'll get the message

 

[Gritt23]

Give him the lettuce leafy Easy. You don't want to get into a tit for tat battle with a creature who can and will - given the chance - peck you Sky remote to bits.

The moment will arrive as you settle down for an evenings football. The missus is out, the beer is cold in the fridge, the take-away has been ordered, and as you sit down to flick the telly on, and shift between the games via the red button, at your leisure, when suddenly, "Oh f***" the buttons have been pecked to oblivion, and as you turn around to shout, Bruse has his back turned and you are sure you can see his shoulders shaking from the laughter.

 

[Easy 10]

But thats like giving in to TERRORISM Gritty. No, I won't do it.

I won't.

 

[The Large One]

PUNCH him in the FACE.

 

[Rangdo]

Feed him to the venus fly trap. That'll learn him.

 

[Bakesy]

Have you got a Lean Mean Grilling Machine? If so, switch it on, leave it open with a lettuce leaf on it.When he settles on the leaf, close it quickly and hold shut tightly.When the squalking stops your lightly grilled Birdie Salad will be ready.Would Sir like any dressings with his meal?

 

[Lord Bracknell]

Have you got a Lean Mean Grilling Machine?

Parrot-eating (technically termed psittacophagy) has an illustrious history dating back to ancient Rome, where the bird was considered a rare delicacy. The culinary chronicler Apicius recommended either roasting the feathered fiends or boiling them in wine, with a sauce of cumin, coriander, mint and dates. If that doesn't whet your beak, consider parrot asado tacos or even, to add a California-fusion twist, parrot pineapple pizza.

 

[Marc]

dunno if this has been said but maybe you should feed BRUCE to LEON just to see what happens like!

 

[Simster]

I think you should crush the lettuce into a pulpy broth-like compound and feed it to Bruce.

After slicing off his f***ing BEAK with a bread knife, the cheeky TOSSER.

 

[Biscuit]

David. Never have I met a more callous, ill tempered animal hater. Your blatant disrespect for anything other than yourself is sickening.

As a citizen of this country, which I believe in and which I have seen David tear apart, I must stand up and fight for our heritage, traditions, and values. Before I launch into my main topic, I want to make a few matters crystal-clear: (1) David has gone way too far with his no-compromise attitude, and (2) as a result of that, I'm decidedly tired of nutty, quixotic drug lords.

Prudence is no vice. Cowardice -- especially David's out-of-touch form of it -- is. I don't object to David's pronouncements because David's bald-faced lies and growing list of material falsehoods raise some new and very disturbing issues.

David's positions are not just retroactively ineffective but proactively inert.

You make me sick.

 

[magoo]

he looks like a snidey little bastard!

either way, giving him lettuce or not, it won't make any difference to that self centred twat!

 

[Gritt23]

But thats like giving in to TERRORISM Gritty. No, I won't do it.

I won't.

No it's not, it's rising above the tit for tat attacks, he'll only get under your skin, and wind you up, and the the wife will say something like "how can you have got so petty, it's only a bird" and then you find yourself standing there in the middle of the room armed with the string your were about to tie it's legs together with, and you're feeling ever so slightly silly.

 

[ben andrews' girlfriend]

Be nice to Bruce!!! Even if he did fly at my head!

 

[watsongooal]

Cut his feet off so every time he tries to stand on his perch he falls off