Royston Vasey

[huge]

Tubbs counting the stars....
One, two, three, five, twelvety, six, ten…oh, there are too many, Edward!

 

[BearwoodSeagull]

''doubtless you've been in the bathroom...spraying your belly with sticky white love piss''
In this house we do not use the 'F' word... This is a Toad!"
Harvey Denton

Iris: "...Oh hello Mrs Levenson, come in. Ron was just filling a crack in the bedroom"

Ross: You know what that means don't you Pauline?
Pauline: Yes Ross, at home all day flicking myself off to Trisha...

 

[huge]

Policeman.
"I'm looking for a boy"

Edward
"poofta eh?"

Tubbs
"we didn't burn him!"

 

[Sussex Nomad]

Just settling down to watch the whole first series of The League of Gentleman.

Not being a DVD player aficionado I've cocked up the remote control and it'll only work on my tv which doesn't help cos it's also the home cinema system and I can't find the manual... f***ing technology! Oh that was me, not a quote from the show.

 

[BearwoodSeagull]

"how about a game of go Johnny go go?"

 

[huge]

Pauline: Watch your language.
Mickey: English.
Pauline: No WATCH!!!!

 

[huge]

Geoff Tipps: [crying] It's just a big bloody joke to you isn't it? Oh, Geoff can't tell a joke. Geoff is a joke. Geoff enters a talet competition and loses. Me mam said I would win. I was only eight. WELL YA KNOW I'VE GOT THIS GUN DON'T YA? [pulls out gun] Oh you're listening now. Well you, are going to tell this joke And we're all gonna laugh. Or Mike gets it! [puts gun to Mike's head]

 

[BearwoodSeagull]

Babs Cabs.....
"I've been on hormones for 18 months....my nipples are like bullets"

 

[huge]

Herr Lip: If you don't understand any of my sayings, come to me in private and I will take you in my German mouth.

 

[huge]

Radcliffe Denton: I once saw daddy beat a man until both he and the man were crying.