I got stitched......

[John Dorian]

Last night, i recieved a telephone call from a police officer, saying my car was parked illegally and that it was to be towed away unless I get to my car and move it imediatly. I would like to point out that I live in Chichester, and in a permit area, and currently do not have a permit. At this point it was monsoon weather outside, yet, as I shit myself my housemate and I ran in the weather to my car, in shorts and a t-shirt and flip flops. I get to the car, find know police officers and my mates with a camera and pissing themselves. It was all staged and they got me an absolute treat.

I turn to Northstandchat, as it is now time for comeuppance. Anyone got any suggestions ? I was thinking about gettin hold of a clamp, but i wouldnt no where to go for that....your thoughts would be much appreciated.

 

[Uncle Buck]

Piss through their letter box.



















Opps, wrong thread.

 

[John Dorian]

If i did that i'd be pissing through my own letterbox. I might shit in his shoes....

 

[CHAPPERS]

Fish behind the radiator.

 

[Lokki 7]

Superglue his eyes shut while he is sleeping.

 

[Uncle Buck]

Stash drugs in his luggage next time he goes away and tip off customs.

That should give him a few years to mull over stitching you up.

 

[Drumstick]

Hire him the ugliest hooker you can find, say you'll pay her after her services. That should scare the shit outa him!

 

[CHAPPERS]

Straight up murder his ass.

 

[Lokki 7]

Fist him up the arse with a barb wire glove.

 

[Uncle Buck]

Fist him up the arse with a barb wire glove.

Been on those specialist websites again?

 

[Basil Fawlty]

Cement his shoes, so he will have to walk out bare foot?

 

[Wardy]

Cement his shoes, so he will have to walk out bare foot?

Walk-out where?

 

[Hampden Park]

flush his camera down the bog

 

[Lokki 7]

Been on those specialist websites again?

A boy's gotta earn a living somehow.

 

[John Dorian]

This is giving me some ideas boys, keep them coming.

 

[Scoffers]

Break a raw egg in his bed on a night when he's been out on the tiles and too pissed to realise, then when he wakes up..........................

 

[Commander]

Cut him.

 

[Basil Fawlty]

Place itching power in his clothes?

 

[Lokki 7]

Piss on his head.

 

[jonny.rainbow]

We once got a fine from the DVLA for a former occupant of our house, who had jumped a red light and caused an accident.

It had a photo from the camera on the traffic light on it. We managed to scan in a picture of our housemates car and change all the relevant details to his and left it with the morning post.

Classic.

He never did manage to get us back.