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[Misc] Having a pet put down and the guilt that follows







Ooh it’s a corner

Well-known member
Aug 28, 2016
5,347
Nr. Coventry
I've just read this thread and wanted to say thank you to (nearly) all the contributors for making me feel a bit better tonight.

We had to take Bruno (just under five years old) the cockerpoo to be put to sleep today and I'm in bits because while I know it was completely the right thing to do, I still feel awful.

He broke his back a couple of years ago and we made the decision to go for surgery, partly because he was so young we figured he deserved another chance. He made a decent recovery, but we were warned at the time it could/would happen again. He hadn't been himself for a few weeks recently and was showing a lot of the symptoms he had before and just after his surgery. We knew that something serious was going on. He also had extreme resource guarding issues, which meant caring for him was tougher than for a 'normal' dog and we always had to be on our guard.

We'd said we wouldn't put him through anything else - and he looked at us today at times as if to say 'please help me', so I know we did the right thing (and the vet agreed, having read his history), but that doesn't stop the guilt.

I'll really miss him - and I was the only one of us five Bobkins who didn't actually WANT a dog. But he won me around, became my running buddy and his main partner for walks. Never again - I'm not going through all that again!
Like you @Greg Bobkin, I was the one in our family who really didn’t want a dog(2005). Nineteen years(4 labradors and 1 St. Bernese) later we’ve not been without a dog since(2 are still with us).

So sorry to hear of your loss - many of us have been there as you can tell - you did the right thing for him, that’s what matters most.

Be happy he was with you, not sad he’s gone.

The Bobkins will probably decide if you have another anyway😊
 






PILTDOWN MAN

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Sep 15, 2004
19,284
Hurst Green
I've just read this thread and wanted to say thank you to (nearly) all the contributors for making me feel a bit better tonight.

We had to take Bruno (just under five years old) the cockerpoo to be put to sleep today and I'm in bits because while I know it was completely the right thing to do, I still feel awful.

He broke his back a couple of years ago and we made the decision to go for surgery, partly because he was so young we figured he deserved another chance. He made a decent recovery, but we were warned at the time it could/would happen again. He hadn't been himself for a few weeks recently and was showing a lot of the symptoms he had before and just after his surgery. We knew that something serious was going on. He also had extreme resource guarding issues, which meant caring for him was tougher than for a 'normal' dog and we always had to be on our guard.

We'd said we wouldn't put him through anything else - and he looked at us today at times as if to say 'please help me', so I know we did the right thing (and the vet agreed, having read his history), but that doesn't stop the guilt.

I'll really miss him - and I was the only one of us five Bobkins who didn't actually WANT a dog. But he won me around, became my running buddy and his main partner for walks. Never again - I'm not going through all that again!
So sad but you know you done the right thing :(
 




Fignon's Ponytail

Well-known member
Jun 29, 2012
4,345
On the Beach
Nice article on the subject I thought...

Thats brought tears to my eyes, as we did exactly this a few years ago when my mother-in-laws Labrador, Herbie, had reached that point. He couldn't get up off the floor outside the back door as his back legs had gone, so I sat with him until the woman arrived, and he went very peacefully in my arms, in his favourite spot. Horrible at the time, but so much better than taking that final drive to the vets....
 


thedonkeycentrehalf

Moved back to wear the gloves (again)
Jul 7, 2003
9,106
I've just read this thread and wanted to say thank you to (nearly) all the contributors for making me feel a bit better tonight.

We had to take Bruno (just under five years old) the cockerpoo to be put to sleep today and I'm in bits because while I know it was completely the right thing to do, I still feel awful.

He broke his back a couple of years ago and we made the decision to go for surgery, partly because he was so young we figured he deserved another chance. He made a decent recovery, but we were warned at the time it could/would happen again. He hadn't been himself for a few weeks recently and was showing a lot of the symptoms he had before and just after his surgery. We knew that something serious was going on. He also had extreme resource guarding issues, which meant caring for him was tougher than for a 'normal' dog and we always had to be on our guard.

We'd said we wouldn't put him through anything else - and he looked at us today at times as if to say 'please help me', so I know we did the right thing (and the vet agreed, having read his history), but that doesn't stop the guilt.

I'll really miss him - and I was the only one of us five Bobkins who didn't actually WANT a dog. But he won me around, became my running buddy and his main partner for walks. Never again - I'm not going through all that again!
Sorry to read this but you know you have done the right thing for Bruno and the decision you took is a much harder one than just putting it off and him being in more pain.

It will take time but as others have said, remember the good times you had with Bruno and try not to focus on the last few days.

We had to take a similar decision around our dog who was a similar age and even now, two years on, we still talk about him and miss him but we know in our hearts it was the right thing to do. We are also in the never again camp...for now!
 


MJsGhost

Oooh Matron, I'm an
NSC Patron
Jun 26, 2009
4,974
East
I've just read this thread and wanted to say thank you to (nearly) all the contributors for making me feel a bit better tonight.

We had to take Bruno (just under five years old) the cockerpoo to be put to sleep today and I'm in bits because while I know it was completely the right thing to do, I still feel awful.

He broke his back a couple of years ago and we made the decision to go for surgery, partly because he was so young we figured he deserved another chance. He made a decent recovery, but we were warned at the time it could/would happen again. He hadn't been himself for a few weeks recently and was showing a lot of the symptoms he had before and just after his surgery. We knew that something serious was going on. He also had extreme resource guarding issues, which meant caring for him was tougher than for a 'normal' dog and we always had to be on our guard.

We'd said we wouldn't put him through anything else - and he looked at us today at times as if to say 'please help me', so I know we did the right thing (and the vet agreed, having read his history), but that doesn't stop the guilt.

I'll really miss him - and I was the only one of us five Bobkins who didn't actually WANT a dog. But he won me around, became my running buddy and his main partner for walks. Never again - I'm not going through all that again!

Sorry for your loss @Greg Bobkin

You know this already, but I'm sure it won't harm to hear it again: it was the right thing to do and the kind thing to do. More suffering wouldn't have been fair on anyone, but taking that hard decision has saved him pain.

We've had a cockapoo for 7 years now and he comes with me pretty much everywhere (even the office). Our bond is incredible - the wife accuses me of loving him more than her 😬 and sometimes even more than our 2 young kids... (not usually the case, but there are occasions :lolol: )
To think of him not being around breaks my heart.

You have my sympathy and don't let anyone pooh-pooh your feelings because "it's just a dog".

Give yourself time to decide whether or not you want Bruno II in your life, but carry on with the walks with or without a pooch.
 




Greg Bobkin

Silver Seagull
May 22, 2012
15,636
Just a little (happier, I hope) update from my side to say that we're picking up Flo the Cavapoo on Sunday!

In some ways it still seems a bit early for me, but we're predominantly doing it for the youngest Bobkin who, for reasons I won't go into here, got SO much out of Bruno and misses him terribly.

In some ways I feel guilty about the boy being 'replaced' so soon, but everything else feel into place so well it was like fate!

Everyone has their own opinions about it, but I guess you have to do what you think is right and put your own feelings aside and look at the bigger picture. So bring on the fun and games!
 


Ooh it’s a corner

Well-known member
Aug 28, 2016
5,347
Nr. Coventry
Just a little (happier, I hope) update from my side to say that we're picking up Flo the Cavapoo on Sunday!

In some ways it still seems a bit early for me, but we're predominantly doing it for the youngest Bobkin who, for reasons I won't go into here, got SO much out of Bruno and misses him terribly.

In some ways I feel guilty about the boy being 'replaced' so soon, but everything else feel into place so well it was like fate!

Everyone has their own opinions about it, but I guess you have to do what you think is right and put your own feelings aside and look at the bigger picture. So bring on the fun and games!
Good news - I did tell you your ‘never again’ comment wouldn’t last long. Bruno isn’t being replaced of course - it’s just his legacy living on😊
Have fun!
 


Worried Man Blues

Well-known member
Feb 28, 2009
7,106
Swansea
1722526703309.jpeg
 




Not Andy Naylor

Well-known member
Dec 12, 2007
8,942
Seven Dials
We've had to have five cats put to sleep over the years, and although it was hard every time, I promise you that the worst one by far was the one that the vet said we'd left too long. As a wiser person than myself once said, pet owning is an investment in heartbreak that always pays off. We know what we're getting into and it's part of the responsibilities we take on. Not that that will ever make it easier. Just love them while they're here.
 


Vin

Well-known member
Jun 12, 2021
577
We had our beloved Staffy (Vinny) put down last year he was nearly 17. Such a great dog and amazing with our young children. He had a checkered life with lots of operations, allergies and illnesses. His last few months he declined quite rapidly and we made the decision to put him to rest to avoid any suffering (he had good days and bad). My friend came round the night before and Vinny was perfect and seemed normal. My mate couldn’t understand why we were putting him to sleep the next day.

I took Vinny to the beach which he adored and got him some special sausages as a last treat. Then he saw all the family for the final time.

We opted for a vet to come to our house and put him to sleep in his comfy bed, surrounded by our young children and my wife. It was very difficult to comprehend. I understand some people don’t want to be around and leave it to a Vet at a practice. As difficult as it was I think the animal would prefer to be with their family and not a stranger on their own.

RIP Vinny.
 


Cheshire Cat

The most curious thing..
Just a little (happier, I hope) update from my side to say that we're picking up Flo the Cavapoo on Sunday!

In some ways it still seems a bit early for me, but we're predominantly doing it for the youngest Bobkin who, for reasons I won't go into here, got SO much out of Bruno and misses him terribly.

In some ways I feel guilty about the boy being 'replaced' so soon, but everything else feel into place so well it was like fate!

Everyone has their own opinions about it, but I guess you have to do what you think is right and put your own feelings aside and look at the bigger picture. So bring on the fun and games!
You never replace a pet.

You are owned by the next one.
 




Weststander

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Aug 25, 2011
67,435
Withdean area
Just a little (happier, I hope) update from my side to say that we're picking up Flo the Cavapoo on Sunday!

In some ways it still seems a bit early for me, but we're predominantly doing it for the youngest Bobkin who, for reasons I won't go into here, got SO much out of Bruno and misses him terribly.

In some ways I feel guilty about the boy being 'replaced' so soon, but everything else feel into place so well it was like fate!

Everyone has their own opinions about it, but I guess you have to do what you think is right and put your own feelings aside and look at the bigger picture. So bring on the fun and games!

We did exactly the same, but with felines. Rescue twins. It didn’t and doesn’t alter our forever love for our cat that passed.
 


Flounce

Well-known member
Nov 15, 2006
3,435
Having to put a pet down is like losing a member of your family imo. I have cried my eyes out at every single one and being a wimp I have saddled my wife with it every time :down:

I am not proud about that.
 


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