Half & half scarves. A discussion.

[Lady Whistledown]

In anticipation of the forthcoming FA Cup match a week on Saturday, I would like to raise the issue of half & half scarves. Principally the statement "If you are over ten years old and you buy one, you're embarrassing yourself". Feel free to disagree, but this is my take:

-firstly, the people who produce them are nothing but a bunch of parasites with absolutely no connection to either club, who sit at home scanning each weekend's fixtures and working out where they can make a bit of money by ringing their contacts at some derelict sweatshop and getting them to knock off a hundred shitty (say) Dagenham & Redbridge/Norwich polyester monstrosities. These scarves are so shit and so unofficial they can't even use the proper club badges so they just take some kind of rough approximation, an oddly shaped cockerel if it's Spurs, or maybe the town crest. Why would anyone want to give these twunts money? They don't care about the Albion, or any of the other clubs whose stuff they knock off, they just view the cup as a personal money making exercise.

-secondly, because unless it's a genuine special occasion- I would include the first game at the Amex as one of these, so those who did purchase Albion-Doncaster scarves from the club shop are just about excepted from this rule- it makes you look like a complete NODDY fan if you buy one. It's the sort of thing that fans of non league teams would do when they draw a big club in the FA Cup and all of a sudden half the town turns up, 90% of whom have never been to a game before. If you follow Havant & Waterlooville to Liverpool and want a souvenir of the biggest (and only) day in your H&W supporting life, then it's reasonable to buy such a scarf. If you support a Championship club (with aspirations of being in the Premier League) and you buy a half & half scarf because your team is playing the likes of Newcastle or Aston Villa, then you really need a good talking to. You look like a football tourist. Stoke City-Albion FA Cup scarves are just about the worst item of football CRAP I've ever seen (and I went in the Goldstone shop plenty of times).

Finally, if you needed any other proof of just how utterly wrong half & half scarves are unless you are 8 years old, a non-league fan going to Anfield, or your team is playing in a Champions League game, then this is it:




Please don't feed the parasites at the Amex.

 

[Giraffe]

100% agreed. Fine if you are a tourist, otherwise forget it.

 

[Lady Whistledown]

You just know that somewhere in a run down workshop with no windows in a back street of Hackney, some bloke is sat there earning £6.28 an hour running up Norwich City-Luton Town scarves as we speak

 

[RupertsFlan]

I'd go even further. I would ask that people who buy and wear these are ejected from the stadium - and thrown under the next train to Brighton.

Utterly appalling tat that is bought by people who were depicted in The Fast Show - I hate these things with a passion and would happily take said scarf and piss on it.

UNless of course it belonged to someone who was older and bigger than me.

Which of course they dont.

 

[Ⓩ-Ⓐ-Ⓜ-Ⓞ-Ⓡ-Ⓐ]

It's true. They are terribly tinpot.

 

[Lady Whistledown]

Oh sweet Jesus.

 

[Tooting Gull]

I'd go even further. I would ask that people who buy and wear these are ejected from the stadium - and thrown under the next train to Brighton.

Utterly appalling tat that is bought by people who were depicted in The Fast Show - I hate these things with a passion and would happily take said scarf and piss on it.

UNless of course it belonged to someone who was older and bigger than me.

Which of course they dont.

Seems reasonable. Or if not actually killing them, take away the vote at least.

 

[marshy68]

I think you have to mentally ill to buy one.

 

[Birdie Boy]

99% agree, the other 1% thinks that people need to make a living.. nah, fcuk it, 100% agree!

 

[Wozza]

-secondly, because unless it's a genuine special occasion- I would include the first game at the Amex as one of these, so those who did purchase Albion-Doncaster scarves from the club shop are just about excepted from this rule-

No. No, they're not!

You wear a scarf to show your support for your club.

If you support Albion and another club equally - and want the world to know?! - you're a f***ing tool. End of.

Why not save a Fiver and write 'TOOL' across your forehead?

What next - half and half shirts? (Leave it, Barber!)

PS The Doncaster ones were official, I think? Disgusting.

 

[JBizzle]

Personally, I think people care far too much about it. Wasn't it Blackpool who created half-half pin badges for every game they were in the Premier League (slightly different to scarves I guess but same principal)? Ultimately, if people want one then its their choice. It doesn't make them a "plastic" or anything, some people just like collecting things, some people have Arsenal as a second club (not that I agree with a "second club" per se), some people may have a fetish for scarves!

I won't buy one because I don't need a scarf and I'd probably buy one of the nice blue scarves with the yellow and white thin stripes down the side if I did incidentally.

I do however agree that they are produced WAY too often. I don't think Arsenal justifies it, the same as I didn't think Chelsea or Livepool did either and am 100% in agreement that it should be only for mega special occasions i.e. Play-Off Finals, Cup Finals, Stadium openings.

I won't judge people who get one though. Its their choice and their money.

 

[Tilehurst Seagull]

Edna, thank you for articulating my utter contempt for these awful beyond description pieces of football tat. It makes any wearer so incredibly tinpot its unbelievable - all offending scarves should be foreceably removed, piled in a heap outside the Amex and ceremonially burned. Just think of the Wicker Man but more pagan

 

[Lady Whistledown]

Peterborough are selling these in their CLUB SHOP for the fourth round tie against Norwich. That's Norwich City, by the way, the mid table Premier League club. Against Peterborough United, the mediocre Championship club. They have actually produced OFFICIAL half & half scarves.

Off the SCALE of embarrassment.

 

[BearwoodSeagull]

No discussion.
They are tinpot, crass and not worthy of a club of our burgeoning stature....end of.

 

[jonny.rainbow]

Or you could just let people spend their money on what they want?

We've already got the song police and the catering police in action. No need to implement the merchandising police.

 

[Lady Whistledown]

It does seem to be something which is peculiarly attractive to Scousers.

 

[ozzygull]

No. No, they're not!

You wear a scarf to show your support for your club.

If you support Albion and another club equally - and want the world to know?! - you're a f***ing tool. End of.

Why not save a Fiver and write 'TOOL' across your forehead?

What next - half and half shirts? (Leave it, Barber!)

PS The Doncaster ones were official, I think? Disgusting.

Offical ones.

Brighton - Spurs - Opening of the Stadium
Brighton - Donny - First League Game at Amex.
Those seem reasonable to me, as they were more about the occasion not the opposition. Did not buy one though.

Have not seen any for FA cup games. Thank Goodness

 

[BearwoodSeagull]

I think you have to mentally ill to buy one.

Mostly seen being worn by Window lickers.......

 

[robynsdad]

Get all that. Can I just check opinion on large cardboard cut out FA cups covered in tinfoil?

 

[Lady Whistledown]

Get all that. Can I just check opinion on large cardboard cut out FA cups covered in tinfoil?

A comedy essential. Especially if they look nothing like the FA Cup. They are IRONIC, so that's OK. The scarves are just an excuse for parasites to scalp the day trippers and the terminally naive for money.