Give up guys you can't win

[Rangdo]

I was in the pub with my girlfriend on Saturday and when she went to the bar I noticed that she was looking slimmer than usual. I thought that I would mention it to get brownie points and get in her good books for later that night. When I told her her reply was "do you prefer me like this then or how I was before".
Sensing a trap I thought quickly about my response and decided on the neutral position of "You look great whatever your weight". Now you'd think this would be a safe stance wouldn't you (well as a bloke you probably would) but I was promptly told I was full of shit and got the cold shoulder for half an hour (until she got drunk). Please tell me what I could have said to get out of being cornered like that.

 

[ben andrews' girlfriend]

nothing to escape that one afaik!!

 

[fatboy]

Girls are stupid.

The girl I was out with on Saturday night took great delight in making two nil gestures at me all night.

 

[CHAPPERS]

That's an evil trap she's laid there and infortunately you've walked straight into it by saying that she looked good whatever she weighs, it's a non compliment in their eyes. Always try to remain positive with your remarks. Something along the lines of 'you looked great then and you look great now' or something as they are still hearing a 'positive compliment'.

 

[Barnet Seagull]

I always think the safe answer is.

 

[Marc]

she got drunk to half an hour? my kinda girl

 

[Tom Bombadil]

Never say you always look great to me. Women conclude from this that other people think they're fat and ugly.

 

[beorhthelm]

Simple, dont answer it. ignore any trap question. If she presses the issue, tell her your ignoring it because you know any answer will be wrong and that'll mean she get the hump with you. She now has to give up, if she goes off on one or gives you the silent treatment, shes lost.

 

[Marshy]

I would have been honest and said you look better than you did.
Honesty is the best policy, so the women tell me....

 

[Rangdo]

she got drunk to half an hour? my kinda girl

She drinks pints of Kronenbourg so it doesn't take too long.

Originally posted by Chapmans The Saviour

That's an evil trap she's laid there and infortunately you've walked straight into it by saying that she looked good whatever she weighs, it's a non compliment in their eyes. Always try to remain positive with your remarks. Something along the lines of 'you looked great then and you look great now' or something as they are still hearing a 'positive compliment'.

Too right it was an evil trap. I had the feeling of the rabbit caught in the headlights. I knew the impact was imminent but I was frozen to the spot. I went for safety but in bizzaro female world it was an insult.

 

[Halftime Oranges]

Always compliment how she is at present, they usually don't care what you think even tho they say it. They are always conscious of what they look to other people.
Half an hour she must have been clearing those pints

 

[Rangdo]

Always compliment how she is at present, they usually don't care what you think even tho they say it. They are always conscious of what they look to other people.
Half an hour she must have been clearing those pints

She was probably half cut already which would explain her techy-ness. The problem with the here and now approach is that she might say "So you thought I was unattractive then did you". I like Chapmans approach of complimenting both. If only I hadn't had fuzzy Kronenbourg head and could have thouht straight.

 

[perth seagull]

Women eh, you try and be nice and complement them and that's what you get in return! Everything is a f***ing "test" to them!

 

[tedebear]

Find a girlfriend who doesn't play games.... that just pisses me off!!

I like to look great and I like to be told - but I also like to be told the truth by my nearest and dearest - if you can't take the truth from your other half then what sort of relationship is it?

 

[The Large One]

Ha! Trying to second guess a woman when (a) you are talking about her weight when (b) she is half cut. Some people never learn...

I have learned to not pay a compliment unless it is subtley - or unsubtely - asked for, and then make it as ambiguous as possible. Reciting a piece of Brecht or Shaw or Cantona never hurts.

 

[The Laughing Bluebird]

You have my full sympathies, Rangdo.

A few months ago I told a female colleague that I'd noticed she'd lost a little weight, and I said I thought she was looking absolutely fantastic for it.

This was obviously intended as a compliment, and if anyone had said something similar to me I'd have been delighted.

However, her response was: "Are you trying to say I looked like a fat f***ing munter before I lost weight or what? Twat." And off she stormed.

She then blanked me for a week, and the other women in the office said they thought I had been insensitive by saying what I did.

You cannot win, I swear it.....

 

[pasty]

And why are girls allowed to say "My God I'm putting weight on" but even it's true, wo-betide you if you mention it or agree with them.

Come out of the closet and admit girls just like I do - I AM A FAT BASTARD

 

[Rangdo]

This was obviously intended as a compliment, and if anyone had said something similar to me I'd have been delighted.

However, her response was: "Are you trying to say I looked like a fat f***ing munter before I lost weight or what? Twat." And off she stormed.

That's exacly what I was trying to avoid by not giving a straight answer to the original question. However, on avoiding that train wreck I inadvertantly stepped in front of the southbound commuter service.

 

[Easy 10]

The conversation should have gone as follows:

Rangdo: "Good lord my dear, may I remark on how fabulously slim you are looking tonight. You have the very definition of an hourglass figure, your curves are utterly ravishing and I find you intensely arousing. Every day I spend with you, I find my love grows a little bit more. Your perfection simply knows no bounds."
Rangdo's girlfriend: "Do you prefer me like this then, or how I was before ?"
Rangdo: "Well, you certainly don't seem to sweat as much".

 

[pasty]

The conversation should have gone as follows:

Rangdo: "Good lord my dear, may I remark on how fabulously slim you are looking tonight. You have the very definition of an hourglass figure, your curves are utterly ravishing and I find you intensely arousing. Every day I spend with you, I find my love grows a little bit more. Your perfection simply knows no bounds."
Rangdo's girlfriend: "Do you prefer me like this then, or how I was before ?"
Rangdo: "Well, you certainly don't seem to sweat as much".

LOL...Closely followed no doubt by Rangdo's next words "Ambulance Service please"