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Funny article about Portsmouth



Austrian Gull

Well-known member
Feb 5, 2009
2,489
Linz, Austria
Just in case you're a bit down about Portsmouth being taken over...

You could never tell the author is a Brighton fan!

Everything you need to know about Portsmouth | Portsmouth - Times Online

Everything you need to know about Portsmouth
Nick Szczepanik

Portsmouth spent money like drunken, er, sailors under Harry Redknapp, won the FA Cup and got into Europe — so why sell?

Alexandre Gaydamak, the owner, decided last year that he couldn’t afford to keep bankrolling the club. He put in his own money when he took over in 2006, but many big signings were funded with loans. There was talk about them being the first Premier League club to go into administration.

But surely a Premier League club is a licence to print money?

It’s true you can see £30 million a year from the TV deals, but Portsmouth aren’t a global brand such as Manchester United, who pull in millions from shirt sales in the Far East. And player wages at Fratton Park have been very high.

How high?

One player who played 11 minutes of first-team football this season is reckoned to be on £40,000 a week. Multiply that by 18 and it must have eaten up all the gate receipts. Fratton Park, at 20,338, had the smallest capacity in the Premier League this season.

Aren’t Portsmouth building a new ground on the harbour?

No, that fell through when the Royal Navy said terrorists could fire missiles from the upper levels.

Was that the club’s first attempt at building a new ground?

No, they’ve been trying for years. They thought they had one at Farlington, just off the M27, but it was found to be a nesting ground for brent geese and therefore a site of special scientific interest.

So what’s the plan now?

The club have found another site on former landfill at Horsea Island.

And building is under way?

Er, no. New motorway exits and other infrastructure issues will be expensive, so residential and retail developments are needed to help to fund the project, and that almost certainly means a public inquiry, which could take years. Even without a retail development, a change to the city plan to accommodate the stadium will still be subject to an inquiry.

So what’s happening now?

Plans have been revived for redeveloping Fratton Park, turning the pitch through 90 degrees and expanding on to adjacent land used as a car park. That would take the capacity up to 30,000.

Do the club need a stadium of that size?

At times they have struggled to sell out. But the club gets the least income per seat in the Premier League because there are few premium seats and no boxes.

And do they forget about a new stadium?

No, the club say that plans for Horsea Island will continue. So let’s get this straight — they’ve had trouble building one new ground but now they want to build two.

And this new waterside stadium — what about global warming? Won’t the pitch be under water in a few years?

Shhh . . .
 






seagullsovergrimsby

#cpfctinpotclub
Aug 21, 2005
43,875
Crap Town
Pompey fans will think that Nick is an undercover scummer.
 


7:18

Brighton & Hove Albion
Aug 6, 2006
8,481
Brighton, England
whats all this about the stadium being built on the harbour scrapped due to it being a potential missile launching site? must have missed this
 


perseus

Broad Blue & White stripe
Jul 5, 2003
23,459
Sūþseaxna
Can't build a stadium on Horsea Island, there is a one-eyed seal called Nelson who lives there. Have you ever heard of a football cub on an island! They are sinking!
 






Lady Whistledown

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 7, 2003
47,499
Sven Goran Eriksson's interested in their manager's job, according to the BBC.

I'm torn between hoping they give the job to Paul Hart, and enjoying watching them dance around the relegation places next season, or hoping Eriksson gets it, and bleeds them dry with his wages before leaving when a bigger club comes fluttering their eyelashes.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/p/portsmouth/8073688.stm
 






Silent Bob

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Dec 6, 2004
22,172
Sven Goran Eriksson's interested in their manager's job, according to the BBC.

I'm torn between hoping they give the job to Paul Hart, and enjoying watching them dance around the relegation places next season, or hoping Eriksson gets it, and bleeds them dry with his wages before leaving when a bigger club comes fluttering their eyelashes.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/p/portsmouth/8073688.stm
Given the job did with Mexico you could get both.
 




Not Andy Naylor

Well-known member
Dec 12, 2007
8,946
Seven Dials
Pompey fans will think that Nick is an undercover scummer.

Already been outed as a Brighton fan on the Times Online message boards - but dismissed as a "bitter rival" - as if we could be bothered thinking of Portsmouth as rivals. Only in the strange worlds of BBC South and Meridian are the two clubs in the same universe ...
 




bigc

New member
Jul 5, 2003
5,740
I wonder who the player who only played 11minutes of football and was on 40k a week is..
 






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