Fridays Best Joke

[steve-c]

 

[brighton rock]

A sewer rat turns to the another and says, "I'm sick of this!"

"Sick of what?" responds the other rat.

"Sick of sh*t for breakfast, sh*t for lunch, sh*t for dinner, sh*t for

tea.... sh*t all day long. I'm just sick of it",

says the first rat.

"Don't worry", replied the second, "I know what will cheer you

up....






tonight we'll go on the p!ss....."

 

[FalmerforAll!**]

 

[Robot Chicken]

How do you make a cat go "Woof"?
Douse it in petrol and strike a match....

WOOF!

 

[brighton rock]

I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.

The moral of this story is:

Always keep your condoms in your car

 

[Robot Chicken]

Nice one.

Probably time to post the www.sickipedia.org link again

 

[Pevenseagull]

Nice one.

Probably time to post the www.sickipedia.org link again

"Steve Irwin walks into a barb"

 

[Robot Chicken]

It was a shame to see Steve Irwin had died but you can be sure that he wont be the last bloke to be stung by something with big flaps that smells of fish.

What?