Footie Commentators

[Parson Henry]

Listening to Motty on the England Northern Ireland reminded me of how infuriating he can be at times. I forget his exact words but time and time again he referred to the heroic exploits of the Irish.

Was it just me or did anyone else notice?

That was an introductory comment. On a more broader note perhaps we can have a thread on the good, the bad and the darn right infuriating in the sphere of the footie commentary.

My personal hate is/was Barry Davies - always favoured the so called big club, would always put the albon down wherever possible.

Favourite - Jonathan Pierce - Can make the most dour game quite exciting.

Your views please.

 

[Napper]

John Motson was on my plane back from Manchester on saturday with Gary Linekar, Garth Crooks, Graeme Le Saux. Linekar seemed to appreciate a drunken plane singing to him as he cosied in to his business class seat. As for commentators went off John Motson since that PS2 game, quite like Jonathan Pierce at the moment

 

[Jam The Man]

Motson used to be the king, but he gets too over excited these days which is a shame... Davies wasn't much cop at all, nor was Brian Moore (RIP)... and if Martin Tyler calls Fergie ALEC rather than ALEX one more time, i'm gonna trash the box.

 

[Jam The Man]

Motson used to be the king, but he gets too over excited these days which is a shame... Davies wasn't much cop at all, nor was Brian Moore (RIP)... and if Martin Tyler calls Fergie ALEC rather than ALEX one more time, i'm gonna trash the box.

 

[Rangdo]

I can't bear Jonathan Pierce. Its just his voice that irritates me. I think Le Saux is very good technically. On Saturday he was spotting incidents first time whereas Motty frequently has to see the replay to get the correct version of events. He needs someone with more charisma alongside him though.

 

[The Large One]

Jonathan Peirce is SHITE. ABSOLUTE SHITE. He screams at absolutely everything. He says nothing far too loudly. What a nob.

Motty is getting over-excited about everything these days as well. Once upon a time, he used to be dull - trotting out mundane, treacle-forming irrelevant facts. Now he does it when Gary Neville has the ball four octaves higher and 100 decibels louder than he used to.

Barry Davies was KERWALITY. I don't believe that stuff about 'favouring the big teams' - utter tosh.
'Oh dear... and Italy are leaving a major tournament early once again - BECAUSE THEY WILL NOT LEARN.'
'65 minutes gone, and England looking better value for their 'nil'.'
'30 seconds to go until five minutes before half-time.'
'Interesting... very interesting. Oh look at his face - just look at (yelp) his face.'
'And where were the Germans? But frankly, who cares?' (Yes, I know that was hockey).

Martyn Tyler - now there's a chancer who got lucky. Commentating on f***ing Anglia television from Layer Road or Kenilworth Road. He must have some seriously shit-hot blackmail leverage over the executives at Sky to have landed that number.

Clive Tyldesley was REALLY irritating when he started at ITV - horribly worse than Gabriel Whatsisface, the hippie skeleton. He moved to BBC and the shit puns stopped and he started talking sense. He then moved back to ITV and just occasionally reverts to his old ways. But not bad other than that.

Andrew Hawes. For f***'s sake, man, SPEAK UP.

 

[Easy 10]

Andrew Hawes. For f***'s sake, man, SPEAK UP. [/B]

Seconded.
As soon as Harty says "And we'll go back to Hawesy now, as he's speaking with Albion manager Mark McGhee..." I'm immediately reaching for my (volume) knob.

"(mumble mumble) joining me now...(mumble mumble)..Mark Mcghee...(mumble...mumble)...Mark, what chinese takeaway do you (mumble) with your alien hubcaps (mumble)..."

Say again ?

 

[bigc]

Barry Davies always sounded like an angry public school headmaster "oh and that was a shocking pass, what was he thinking?"

Martin Tyler used to get "we love man utd here at sky" syndrome, to the fact I remember him and Andy Gray started prattling on about them for about 10mins in a game they werent even playing in midway thru the 2002/3 season. I just remember he kept saying the "so good they named him twice" about Djemba Djemba thing so many times in the 2003 pre season. WHAT BOLLOCKS! lol

I used to like Motty but now he has an orgasm every time Rooney gets the ball

 

[Jam The Man]

Doh!

 

[Jam The Man]

Seconded.
As soon as Harty says "And we'll go back to Hawesy now, as he's speaking with Albion manager Mark McGhee..." I'm immediately reaching for my (volume) knob.

"(mumble mumble) joining me now...(mumble mumble)..Mark Mcghee...(mumble...mumble)...Mark, what chinese takeaway do you (mumble) with your alien hubcaps (mumble)..."

Say again ?

ActuallYy I meant the above was the funniest thing all day

 

[Jam The Man]

Seconded.
As soon as Harty says "And we'll go back to Hawesy now, as he's speaking with Albion manager Mark McGhee..." I'm immediately reaching for my (volume) knob.

"(mumble mumble) joining me now...(mumble mumble)..Mark Mcghee...(mumble...mumble)...Mark, what chinese takeaway do you (mumble) with your alien hubcaps (mumble)..."

Say again ?

Actually I meant the above was the funniest thing all day

 

[turienzo's lovechild]

a few years ago the itv lot were all wanking off over real madrid

"this is definitely roberto carlos territory" just before he blasts it into the wall/miles over

 

[thedonkeycentrehalf]

Jonathan Peirce is SHITE. ABSOLUTE SHITE. He screams at absolutely everything. He says nothing far too loudly. What a nob.

JP is a very good radio commentator but it has to be said that he still hasn't got his style right for TV. He is very knowledgable about football as anyone who listens to his Five Live show will know - especially about Nationwide teams. He is also very good at promoting the Albion cause - I think he lives in Hove these days which helps.

He is the complete opposite of the ever infuriating Alan Green who seems to have forgotten that he is there to tell people what is happening in the match - we don't care if he thinks it is boring or what his views on other things are - just tell us about the match! He is another with absolutely no knowledge of any football outside of the Premiership/Champions and invited guests league.

I made the mistake of listening to 606 the other week and whenever anyone from a non-premiership team asked him a question, he couldn't answer as he didn't have a clue what they were talking about.

Bring back Danny Baker and make 606 interesting and not just a forum for armchair fans to whinge about their Premier league teams having only been able to spend £20m on players this year.

 

[somerset]

I like to mention Ron Atkinson, never swerved around the issues, always called a spade and spade.......!!!!!!

 

[Withdean Wanderer]

Danny Baker is a legend. Probably not commentator material, but bloody funny and, as thedonkeycentrehalf points out, a very good phone in host.

Totally agree about the Motson/Rooney comment BigC There's only so much pressure you can put on him!

Personally, providing Tyldesley doesnt drop into ManU loving mode i think he's a top commentator. Davies imho just sound old and Motson is beginning to get on my tits!

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

motson crap

barry davies was quality - and where we the germans....but frankly who cares

 

[Schrödinger's Toad]

Alan Green drives me mad, I just can't listen to his commentaries. He won't stop bitching about referees for more than a minute; some of his tirades lasting virtually a whole half. Infuriating.

And Clive Tydlesley is just wank. Patronising, smug, odious, arrogant wankbag.

 

[BatterSeagull]

Ian Dark isnt bad

 

[finbar]

The c*** league is

1. Peter Drury
2. Alan Green
3. Barry Davies
4. Tommy Smith (some fool on eurosport in Australia)

All deserve pain, davies especially for slagging us when we played liverpool - he only didnt come top as hes done the decent thing and retired