Behind Enemy Lines
Well-known member
The following are supposedly actual replies that British women have put on Child Support Agency forms in the section for listing father's details:
>
>1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A. was
>fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B. but I believe that he was conceived on the same night.
>
>2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you with a list of names of the men that I think were at the party if that helps.
>3. I do not know that name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 3600 Grand Ave. where I had unprotected sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father can you send me his phone number? Thanks.
>
>4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced.
>
>5. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ risen again.
>
>6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise.
>
>7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all sqaddies look the same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.
>8. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?
>9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro Disney maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.
>
>10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I'd have stayed and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.
>
>11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure of which one made you fart.
>
>1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A. was
>fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B. but I believe that he was conceived on the same night.
>
>2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you with a list of names of the men that I think were at the party if that helps.
>3. I do not know that name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 3600 Grand Ave. where I had unprotected sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father can you send me his phone number? Thanks.
>
>4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced.
>
>5. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ risen again.
>
>6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise.
>
>7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all sqaddies look the same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.
>8. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?
>9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro Disney maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.
>
>10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I'd have stayed and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.
>
>11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure of which one made you fart.
unbelieveable that people can say that!