Can you be friends with an Ex???

[Lush]

Would you be happy if your current girlfriend still had her ex hanging around? Would you be happy to hear her chatting away to him on the phone? If she said - "oh I'm just meeting X for a drink after work." would that be absolutely fine? Even if you trust her implicitly and know there's no way that anything physical is going to happen, personally I always think it's best for your current relationship if you move on properly.

 

[sunshine]

Not straight away no, but....

I was seeing this bloke a couple of years back, nothing too serious but i liked him. When it ended i was pretty upset and didnt speak to him for ages. Now he is getting married in the summer and i am close to him and his future wife. I am now with someone who i really care about and its all worked out for us.

 

[London Calling]

Definately a big no.

 

[Napper]

Not straight away no, but....

I was seeing this bloke a couple of years back, nothing too serious but i liked him. When it ended i was pretty upset and didnt speak to him for ages. Now he is getting married in the summer and i am close to him and his future wife. I am now with someone who i really care about and its all worked out for us.

bet you'll end up back in bed ....one day

if not , would say you are prime for a swinging experience

 

[Yoda]

Would you be happy if your current girlfriend still had her ex hanging around? Would you be happy to hear her chatting away to him on the phone? If she said - "oh I'm just meeting X for a drink after work." would that be absolutely fine? Even if you trust her implicitly and know there's no way that anything physical is going to happen, personally I always think it's best for your current relationship if you move on properly.

Exactly where I am Kay. Remained friends with my latest ex, but current girlfriend always suspicious when I get a text or call from her. She trusts me completely, just doesn’t trust her.

 

[London Calling]

I broke up with a psycho woman, but she was absolutely stunning, I made the mistake of going on holiday with her "as friends".

What a disaster. One of her actions on that holiday, was to drive around a roundabout continually for 30 minutes or so, just to continually prove there was not a campsite sign!!

I still fantasise about that body etc

 

[Fourteenth Eye]

Wheras i do tend to take Lush's view on this, there are exceptions

 

[SULLY COULDNT SHOOT]

Yes..... many times

Seriously in my experience the answer is no..... stay friends and you leave the opportunity open for it to be more than friends and this can be really damaging.

True Story - Lived with a Turkish girl for three years then broke up and I moved to Poland. Then, I started working for a multinational.... whých (unknown to me) my ex worked for. The first company conference was a bit dodgy but we seemed to get along and seemed to be alright as friends. Three years later I started dating a girl who was working in my ex's department (who is now my wife) and my ex went ballistic when she found out. I honestly thought she's be pleased for us... little did I know (found out later) that she was still hoping we'd get back together.

As my wife says..... never trust other women! (other than herself, that is)

 

[Nibble]

how can it ever be a good idea. One of you is always harbouring a secret wish for reconcilliation. Move on.

Women are like beautiful sunsets. iI is sad when they go but there will be another one tomorrow!

 

[csider]

I'd say no. I do however, have an ex who I f*** every time she is back in town, no strings attached.

Most of the others are kept at arms length, the one who knifed me is a defo "stay the f*** away" Cant live with them, cant leaglly kill em!!

 

[sunshine]

bet you'll end up back in bed ....one day

if not , would say you are prime for a swinging experience

No way would i go back.

 

[Chicken Run]

My wife of 14 years "dumped" me last September and I have three kids, I have tried being friends but deep down the hurt I have suffered comes back, kicks me up the arse and I end up hating her, a few days pass and the thought of hating her is also difficult, dont know what the answer is realy

 

[tedebear]

I'd say no. I do however, have an ex who I f*** every time she is back in town, no strings attached.

That made me laugh that did....You may think its no strings attached, but reality is far from obvious...

 

[The Laughing Bluebird]

How can it ever be a good idea. One of you is always harbouring a secret wish for reconcilliation. Move on.

How can you make such a sweeping generalization?

As I said earlier, two of my best friends are ex-girlfriends. In one of those two cases, myself and the girl concerned have been very close friends for more than twenty years! And neither of us harbour any wishes for a reconcilliation, that's for sure.

 

[British Bulldog]

I dont see why you cant be friends with an ex it just depends on the reasons you broke up and the type pf people you are in regards of putting your relationship behind you.

Mind you having said that I live with my ex wife and convenient as it may be for getting the domestic chores done and the occasional legover i'm not sure we could be described as friends.

 

[Clothes Peg]

I dont see why you cant be friends with an ex it just depends on the reasons you broke up and the type pf people you are in regards of putting your relationship behind you.

Mind you having said that I live with my ex wife and convenient as it may be for getting the domestic chores done and the occasional legover i'm not sure we could be described as friends.

What an odd situation, but I like your style.

 

[Without Limits]

She knows things that nobody knows and I wish I could still talk to her! but cant if were not together

She must want to still talk to me otherwise why she contacting me.

As for her friends like somebody suggested... I think i will pass thanks, The girl I was seeing was a million times better in everyway.

 

[Napper]

She knows things that nobody knows and I wish I could still talk to her! but cant if were not together

She must want to still talk to me otherwise why she contacting me.

As for her friends like somebody suggested... I think i will pass thanks, The girl I was seeing was a million times better in everyway.

what did she know, maybe sharing with NSC will make it better

 

[eastlondonseagull]

Yes, am good friends with my ex. We were together five years, split up a few years ago. She was an usher at my wedding last year.

 

[Meade's Ball]

I suppose it is impossible to make a rule for all humans in this sense.
Your ties in a break-up are officially over though. So the prominent expectations and responsibilities of a brief life of partnership for however long have to perish. Any that live can be ignored or seen to be too much to take.
For me, to meet someone else i feel i may deeply love forever, i wouldn't be able to continue chatting or seeing an ex. More than likely to make a 'newbie' uncomfortable and allow the continuation of a closeness that seems to invade the speciality me and a new one might have. No need to compare or consider or remember someone else.
I would hope myself hated enough never to be talked to again. Otherwise maybe i never really mattered.