Best Man Speeches

[Del Boy]

Does anyone has any good memories of best man speeches / gags etc they have used or heard in the past?

 

[C1 BHA]

go to

http://www.hitched.co.uk/speeches/examples/showall.asp?type=1

You WILL get some ideas here......

Good luck, relax and enjoy your day.

 

[Bakesy]

Does anyone has any good memories of best man speeches / gags etc they have used or heard in the past?

Ask Easy 10........he's only recently tied the knot, and he posted a similar thread to yours.
Have a look in the archives as there were some very funny gags suggested.

 

[Del Boy]

Cheers C1 BHA - I will need to relax as I have been nervous since he asked me!

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

I'd like to put forward my best man speech at me bruv's wedding as a cautionary tale.

Read up all the books, knew exactly what to say, who to thank. I was In The ZONE!

Then, on the day, with drink taken, promptly stood up and thanked the parents of both the brides for coming.

Might have got away with it too.

If only the bride hadn't been an orphan

 

[The Clown of Pevensey Bay]

Start it in a Leslie Phillips style voice: "Ladies, stroke Gentlemen, stroke boys, and of course stroke girls."

 

[Beach Hut]

If you do a search under Easy 10 there is a long thread all about this already

 

[Del Boy]

I have just had a read through Easy 10's thread, these seem to be the best....

1. Hello - can you hear me in the back? Good. Then could you make yourself useful and order me another pint.

2. I was told, "the ideal length of the speech should be no longer than it takes me to make love". So I shouldn't be up here for more than 30 seconds.


3. Snap an ariel off a car (at the scrap yard).

When you stand up to make your speech take it out of your jacket pocket and extend it.

This is where the timing comes in, wait, wait a bit longer, then extend the ariel and say I brought this along to make sure we get a good reception.

 

[Del Boy]

EASY - If you read this thread did you use the ariel gag? if so how did it go?

 

[Easy 10]

EASY - If you read this thread did you use the ariel gag? if so how did it go?

I did indeed, and it went down a storm...almost scuppered because the TV aerial I'd bought along got left on the bus in our overnight bag but managed to scrounge a coathanger so it went ahead as planned.

I quite unashambly ripped off loads of gags offered up on these hallowed pages. Makes for amusing viewing on the video, quite a few chuckles and (as I said no the day) even the cake was in tiers.

Boom boom.

 

[Barnet Seagull]

It's not too bad.

I said something along the lines of

best man's speech, didn't know where to start. So thought surf the Internet.

Couple of hours later found some REALLY good stuff.

Then remembered what I was supposed to be looking for.

went down well.

 

[Del Boy]

It's not too bad.

I said something along the lines of

best man's speech, didn't know where to start. So thought surf the Internet.

Couple of hours later found some REALLY good stuff.

Then remembered what I was supposed to be looking for.

went down well.

Top draw - That one and the ariel are one my list!!

Any higher bidders?

 

[eastlondonseagull]

I was my brother's best man about ten years ago. Nearly shat myself b4hand through nerves. But didn't, fortunately. All I really remember is making every one crack up right at the beginning of the speech by doing a toilet gag... it was my turn to stand up and speak, so I did, looked around and just said, "If anyone wants to nip to the loo, now's the time." Everyone fell about laughing (champagne works wonders), I relaxed, and it was alright after that

 

[Hiney]

I did indeed, and it went down a storm...almost scuppered because the TV aerial I'd bought along got left on the bus in our overnight bag but managed to scrounge a coathanger so it went ahead as planned.

I quite unashambly ripped off loads of gags offered up on these hallowed pages. Makes for amusing viewing on the video, quite a few chuckles and (as I said no the day) even the cake was in tiers.

Boom boom.

No doubt The Great Cornholio has already bid for the rights to host the Marvellous Scenes on albionarchives??