Kev the Ape
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- Thread starter
- #21
, but me and my ex never shagged so i cannot say that 
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best chat up line you have ever used??
- Thread starter Kev the Ape
- Start date
, but me and my ex never shagged so i cannot say that B.M.F
New member
now that does make it a bit more difficultKev the Ape said:
let me think 
how about I do not suffer from impotence, I just can not get a hard on thinking about a pikey chav slapper like youKev the Ape
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- Thread starter
- #23
Eddie the Seagull
New member
YOU: Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken leg?
HER: No??
YOU: Well, let's go on a picnic and find out.
HER: No??
YOU: Well, let's go on a picnic and find out.
Kev the Ape
New member
- Thread starter
- #25
Apparently I have pulled my stealing girls drinks and asking to see their tits. 
Also if girls think you are a :safeway they seem to want to pull you too.
Tell that girl you think you have got syphillous (sp) and you think she needs to get checked out.
Tell her in front of her friends/family!!!
Also if girls think you are a :safeway they seem to want to pull you too.
Tell that girl you think you have got syphillous (sp) and you think she needs to get checked out.
Tell her in front of her friends/family!!!
Easy 10
Brain dead MUG SHEEP
"Wow, you've got a lovely pair of legs. What time do they open ?"
Scarface
New member
Say "You've let yourself go a bit since we split!"
Scarface
New member
My name is Pinocchio, sit on my face and I'll tell you some lies!
dougdeep
New member
"What's it like to be beautiful" always worked for me.(Honest).
Yoda
English & European
Brightonian74 said:
I like that one! Cian
Well-known member
"Hi, you've probably seen me on TV"
The day after I was interviewed by TV Three at the Young Scientist exhibition for an Intel-sponsored show (rigged that I got "picked", only Technology entrant from near the Intel fab).
And it worked!
The day after I was interviewed by TV Three at the Young Scientist exhibition for an Intel-sponsored show (rigged that I got "picked", only Technology entrant from near the Intel fab).
And it worked!
Yoda
English & European
1/. I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.
2/. (lick fingure and wipe on her top) Let's get you out of those wet clothes.
3/. Nice legs... What time do they open?
4/. Do you work at the Post Office? I thought I saw you checking out my package.
5/. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
6/. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
7/. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
8/. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?
9/. I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.
10/. Wanna play army? I'll lie down and you can blow the hell out of me.
11/. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
12/. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
13/.You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
14/. Id walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
15/. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
16/. (Look down at your crotch) Well, It's not just going to suck itself.
17/. You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
18/. You, Me, Whipped cream and handcuffs. Any questions?
19/. Those closed would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
20/. My name is (name)... remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
21/. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
22/. Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
23/. I know milk doea a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?
24/. Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I?
25/. Do you wash your pants in Mr Sheen because I can see myself in them?
I've used 9, 15 & 19 myself and they worked.
2/. (lick fingure and wipe on her top) Let's get you out of those wet clothes.
3/. Nice legs... What time do they open?
4/. Do you work at the Post Office? I thought I saw you checking out my package.
5/. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
6/. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
7/. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
8/. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?
9/. I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.
10/. Wanna play army? I'll lie down and you can blow the hell out of me.
11/. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
12/. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
13/.You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
14/. Id walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
15/. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
16/. (Look down at your crotch) Well, It's not just going to suck itself.
17/. You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
18/. You, Me, Whipped cream and handcuffs. Any questions?
19/. Those closed would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
20/. My name is (name)... remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
21/. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
22/. Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
23/. I know milk doea a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?
24/. Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I?
25/. Do you wash your pants in Mr Sheen because I can see myself in them?
I've used 9, 15 & 19 myself and they worked.
Brightonian74
New member
'....this is quite embarrassing, but I do have a large penis.'
Northstander
Well-known member
- Oct 13, 2003
- 14,031
chat up lines never work imho, you come across a lot more genuine and sincere by just going up and chatting to em!!
Sorry I lied, I did use chat up lines but was 16 at the time.
Still you do get some funny one liners....
Sorry I lied, I did use chat up lines but was 16 at the time.
Still you do get some funny one liners....
Digweeds Trousers
New member
Go up to a girl and say
"Why are you not wearing any underwear?
She will say, yes I am.
Then look at your watch, tap it and say, damn, bloody thing is 10 minutes fast.
Classic
"Why are you not wearing any underwear?
She will say, yes I am.
Then look at your watch, tap it and say, damn, bloody thing is 10 minutes fast.
Classic
I was at a Punk gig in London earlier this year with REDLAND and mates, I was chatting to this girl and told her I played professional football for BHA.....she bought it I explained all about Falmer and she loved it (for some reason) and she even knew of my mates band...who I then introduced their roadie too....and she LOVED it even more!
Not only that but the Frenzal Rhomb guitarist bought the story aswell and I told him all about Falmer....he's from Australia and looked bewildered!
I explained all about Falmer and she loved it (for some reason) and she even knew of my mates band...who I then introduced their roadie too....and she LOVED it even more!Not only that but the Frenzal Rhomb guitarist bought the story aswell and I told him all about Falmer....he's from Australia and looked bewildered!
