tinx
Well-known member
How many have you done?
If you are a real fan you should get more than 40.
Over 60 you're a star.
80 and over you're a god and should have a stand named
after you at the new Stadium.
1. Paid a tout over double the normal ticket price for
a match ticket.
2. Had a piss on a football terrace (The Chocolate
Boxes = double points).
3. Stopped off at the pub then decided to stay there
and get slaughtered instead of going to the game.
4. Have been on the pitch after an important game.
5. Shed a tear after a particularly sorry or harrowing
defeat.
6. Told the irritating bastard behind you to shut the
f**k up.
7. Spotted yourself on the terraces during Match of
the Day.
8. Spent an entire day avoiding TV & radio to preserve
the tension when you watch the match on telly that
night.
9. Lied to your partner in order to go to a match.
10. Taken a youngster to their first game.
11. Finished your clubs section in a Panini sticker
album.
12. Bought an away shirt which even you admitted was
shit
13. Had a row with your spouse because you went to the
match instead of doing what they wanted to do.
14. Touched the ball when it went into the crowd.
15. Verbally abused a player and caught his attention
- double points for one of your rivals
16. Written your teams nickname on a toilet wall/bus shelter/away football
ground
17. Written a letter of complaint to your or another
club.
18. Followed your team on a trip abroad (double points
if you wore a team shirt in a Hamburg brothel)
19. Ran up a phone bill full of ClubCall charges.
20. Had a drink with a player or ex-player from your
team
21. Owned a season ticket for more than 5 years.
22. Gone in the away end to watch your team at home.
23. Bought the end of season video - from your worst
ever season.
24. Phoned a friend back home to find out the footie
results while on holiday.
25. Bought a comb-holder from the club shop.
26. Gone to see the reserves play.
27. Been to every home game in a season.
28. Sponsored an item of a player's clothing.
29. Repainted or replaced something at home because
it's in your rivals colours.
30. Invested in your clubs Crest tattoo.
31. Hugged a complete stranger after your team have
scored.
32. Skived off work/school to travel to a midweek away
fixture.
33. Queued up for more than 3 hours to buy a ticket.
34. Not bought an item 'cos it was made by your rivals sponsors.
35. Bought a product because its made by your clubs
sponsors.
36. Been to the an FA Cup Final.
37. Eaten a dodgy pie on an away trip.
38. Watched the footie results come in on the TV in a
shop window.
39. Gone to cheer on the opposition at your rivals
ground.
40. Bought players from your team when you managed a
Fantasy League team
41. Refused to go to a friend's wedding because it was
on a matchday.
42. Had a football dream about playing for your club.
43. Met your footballing hero.
44. Seen your hero play.
45. Bribed a turnstile operator to let you into an
all-ticket game.
46. Been in the Executive or Director's box.
47. Climbed something to watch a match from outside
the ground.
48. Cheer when your rivals lose
49. Put a poster of the team on your wall at home or
work.
50. Never left a match before hearing the final
whistle.
51. Written something for a fanzine.
52. Followed a match's progress for the entire 90
minutes on Teletext.
53. Shamelessly convinced a young and impressionable
relative that they should support your club.
54. Driven to another part of the country to listen to
a match on local radio.
55. Watched an entire episode of "Nationwide League
Extra" at 2am simply because it's football
56. Watched your team on the telly or listened on the
radio while shagging.
57. Read factual football books
58. Seen the Film "Escape to Victory"
59. Been ejected from a ground
60. Stayed up all night drinking after a famous
victory - a draw would also suffice.
61. Taken a piece of terracing or turf as a souvenir.
62. Scored a goal for your team in "Subbuteo".
63. Started the singing in the crowd during a game.
64. Smashed something in anger after a heinous defeat.
65. Copied a player's haircut - lose a point if it was
Barry Venison, Waddle or Keegan.
66. Visited your old ground during the close season.
67. Watched every televised match involving players
from your team during a World Cup
68. Seen a World Cup match/qualifier, involving a
player from your team in person.
69. Had sex at your teams ground
70. Fallen out with a best friend or close relative
over club rivalry.
71. Bought a Sky dish purely for the football then
complained that your team are never on.
72. Put one of those shite club windscreen stickers in
your car.
73. Stood in an unprotected part of the ground in the
pissing rain for 90 minutes.
74. Asked your partner to wear a footie shirt during
sex.
75. Successfully explained the offside rule to someone
who doesn't have a clue.
76. Travelled to a match on a football special.
77. Been to at least half the League grounds in the
country.
78. Successfully named the club's entire squad from
memory.
79. Relayed a top comedy anecdote about Lawrie
McMenemy.
80. Been to an away match in the Zenith Data Systems
Cup.
81. Been slated on your clubs email list.
82. Been presented with a birthday cake in your team
colours.
83. Phoned a football radio call-in show to complain
about people slagging your team
84. Smashed a window with a football.
85. Watched the 1966 world cup final
86. Went home early from a good night in the pub to
watch your team on Match of the Day.
87. Applied for a job at your club
88. Parked illegally outside the ground to make sure
you got in in time for kick-off.
89. Dressed a pet or a baby in the club's colours for
a photo.
90. Posed as a Player in order to have sex with a
bird.
91. Bought one of your teams "singles".
92. Sounded an air horn at a match.
93. Hurled abuse at a club mascot.
94. Had a kickaround at the service station on an away
trip.
95. Waited outside the player's entrance to get
autographs.
96. Scored a goal that would have looked good on
video.
97. Own every copy of a club fanzine.
98. Got injured celebrating a goal.
99. Paid good money for a classic match programme.
100. Punched a rival Fan.
If you are a real fan you should get more than 40.
Over 60 you're a star.
80 and over you're a god and should have a stand named
after you at the new Stadium.
1. Paid a tout over double the normal ticket price for
a match ticket.
2. Had a piss on a football terrace (The Chocolate
Boxes = double points).
3. Stopped off at the pub then decided to stay there
and get slaughtered instead of going to the game.
4. Have been on the pitch after an important game.
5. Shed a tear after a particularly sorry or harrowing
defeat.
6. Told the irritating bastard behind you to shut the
f**k up.
7. Spotted yourself on the terraces during Match of
the Day.
8. Spent an entire day avoiding TV & radio to preserve
the tension when you watch the match on telly that
night.
9. Lied to your partner in order to go to a match.
10. Taken a youngster to their first game.
11. Finished your clubs section in a Panini sticker
album.
12. Bought an away shirt which even you admitted was
shit
13. Had a row with your spouse because you went to the
match instead of doing what they wanted to do.
14. Touched the ball when it went into the crowd.
15. Verbally abused a player and caught his attention
- double points for one of your rivals
16. Written your teams nickname on a toilet wall/bus shelter/away football
ground
17. Written a letter of complaint to your or another
club.
18. Followed your team on a trip abroad (double points
if you wore a team shirt in a Hamburg brothel)
19. Ran up a phone bill full of ClubCall charges.
20. Had a drink with a player or ex-player from your
team
21. Owned a season ticket for more than 5 years.
22. Gone in the away end to watch your team at home.
23. Bought the end of season video - from your worst
ever season.
24. Phoned a friend back home to find out the footie
results while on holiday.
25. Bought a comb-holder from the club shop.
26. Gone to see the reserves play.
27. Been to every home game in a season.
28. Sponsored an item of a player's clothing.
29. Repainted or replaced something at home because
it's in your rivals colours.
30. Invested in your clubs Crest tattoo.
31. Hugged a complete stranger after your team have
scored.
32. Skived off work/school to travel to a midweek away
fixture.
33. Queued up for more than 3 hours to buy a ticket.
34. Not bought an item 'cos it was made by your rivals sponsors.
35. Bought a product because its made by your clubs
sponsors.
36. Been to the an FA Cup Final.
37. Eaten a dodgy pie on an away trip.
38. Watched the footie results come in on the TV in a
shop window.
39. Gone to cheer on the opposition at your rivals
ground.
40. Bought players from your team when you managed a
Fantasy League team
41. Refused to go to a friend's wedding because it was
on a matchday.
42. Had a football dream about playing for your club.
43. Met your footballing hero.
44. Seen your hero play.
45. Bribed a turnstile operator to let you into an
all-ticket game.
46. Been in the Executive or Director's box.
47. Climbed something to watch a match from outside
the ground.
48. Cheer when your rivals lose
49. Put a poster of the team on your wall at home or
work.
50. Never left a match before hearing the final
whistle.
51. Written something for a fanzine.
52. Followed a match's progress for the entire 90
minutes on Teletext.
53. Shamelessly convinced a young and impressionable
relative that they should support your club.
54. Driven to another part of the country to listen to
a match on local radio.
55. Watched an entire episode of "Nationwide League
Extra" at 2am simply because it's football
56. Watched your team on the telly or listened on the
radio while shagging.
57. Read factual football books
58. Seen the Film "Escape to Victory"
59. Been ejected from a ground
60. Stayed up all night drinking after a famous
victory - a draw would also suffice.
61. Taken a piece of terracing or turf as a souvenir.
62. Scored a goal for your team in "Subbuteo".
63. Started the singing in the crowd during a game.
64. Smashed something in anger after a heinous defeat.
65. Copied a player's haircut - lose a point if it was
Barry Venison, Waddle or Keegan.
66. Visited your old ground during the close season.
67. Watched every televised match involving players
from your team during a World Cup
68. Seen a World Cup match/qualifier, involving a
player from your team in person.
69. Had sex at your teams ground
70. Fallen out with a best friend or close relative
over club rivalry.
71. Bought a Sky dish purely for the football then
complained that your team are never on.
72. Put one of those shite club windscreen stickers in
your car.
73. Stood in an unprotected part of the ground in the
pissing rain for 90 minutes.
74. Asked your partner to wear a footie shirt during
sex.
75. Successfully explained the offside rule to someone
who doesn't have a clue.
76. Travelled to a match on a football special.
77. Been to at least half the League grounds in the
country.
78. Successfully named the club's entire squad from
memory.
79. Relayed a top comedy anecdote about Lawrie
McMenemy.
80. Been to an away match in the Zenith Data Systems
Cup.
81. Been slated on your clubs email list.
82. Been presented with a birthday cake in your team
colours.
83. Phoned a football radio call-in show to complain
about people slagging your team
84. Smashed a window with a football.
85. Watched the 1966 world cup final
86. Went home early from a good night in the pub to
watch your team on Match of the Day.
87. Applied for a job at your club
88. Parked illegally outside the ground to make sure
you got in in time for kick-off.
89. Dressed a pet or a baby in the club's colours for
a photo.
90. Posed as a Player in order to have sex with a
bird.
91. Bought one of your teams "singles".
92. Sounded an air horn at a match.
93. Hurled abuse at a club mascot.
94. Had a kickaround at the service station on an away
trip.
95. Waited outside the player's entrance to get
autographs.
96. Scored a goal that would have looked good on
video.
97. Own every copy of a club fanzine.
98. Got injured celebrating a goal.
99. Paid good money for a classic match programme.
100. Punched a rival Fan.