I was chained upside-down to a mattress in the basement of a secret splinter cell of Peruvian communist rebels who went by the name of "Mi Chico Latino" (later made famous by Geri Halliwells hit single of the same name).
They tortured me endlessly by prodding my nether-regions with a partially chewed red hot Pepperami. I still have the lesions on my inner thigh to this day.
