You're tiny

[Meade's Ball]

How small would you have to be to feel enforced to have an operation to make yourself much bigger or longer? And if you were small what would you be willing to adopt to your weak body so that you were a robot and took orders from a computer?

 

[only1robbiereinalt]

 

[Trufflehound]

I'm 12 inches, but I'm quite happy as a rule.

 

[Meade's Ball]

I'm 12 inches, but I'm quite happy as a rule.

How big are your hands?

 

[Shizuoka Dolphin]

I'm 12 inches, but I'm quite happy as a rule.

That must be as old as the hills, but I've never heard it before.

 

[CHAPPERS]

About 36 inches, or two and a half feet. Short enough to thieve from HMV undetected and tall enough to get on the sofa.

 

[Trufflehound]

How big are your hands?

The left one fits comfortably on a Swaziland postage stamp.

I have to keep the right one in a special glove in the garage, as it's too big to fit through the front door.

 

[Meade's Ball]

About 36 inches, or two and a half feet. Short enough to thieve from HMV undetected and tall enough to get on the sofa.

Would you get electric legs if you weren't happy or clever?
I'd be Electric Inspector Gadget and i'd become a thiever of middle-aged women's ear rings who can't marry thin men who are young-ish.

 

[Simster]

The left one fits comfortably on a Swaziland postage stamp.

I have to keep the right one in a special glove in the garage, as it's too big to fit through the front door.

Ah, a miniture Jeremy Beadle, if you will.

 

[Trufflehound]

Ah, a miniture Jeremy Beadle, if you will.

People are always mistaking us.

 

[Gluteus Maximus]

37 inches. So I could call Chapman's the Saviour a SHORTARSE.
I would get high heeled shoes so I could still use a yoyo.

 

[Simster]

Would you get electric legs if you weren't happy or clever?
I'd be Electric Inspector Gadget and i'd become a thiever of middle-aged women's ear rings who can't marry thin men who are young-ish.

Or an electric voice like that Stephen Hawking lad.

A handy piece of kit that - you could say the word "owned" and put it on autorepeat and replay it to looney instead of talking to him.

 

[CHAPPERS]

Would you get electric legs if you weren't happy or clever?
.

No I wouldn't. It's not about being bionic, this is the NAUGHTIES you know.

 

[Man of Harveys]

I'd want to have legs small enough that, when my genitalia is tumescent, I really could lean forward and be like a tripod without sustaining too much damage to the tip of the herman gelmet.

Plus ladies love little fellas: no-one ever thought that someone 6'2'' was "sweet".

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Kevin B., L.A., 17 years
Q: My dick is 6 inches long. Is that small? Or is it average? How large is the average dick?


A: Here are the statistics on erect penis lengths for white college men, in quarter-inch lengths measured by The Alfred C. Kinsey Institute for Sex Research (from the point where the penis meets the body along the top to its tip):

percent length
0.2 percent 3.75 inches
0.3 percent 4 inches
0.2 percent 4.25 inches
1.7 percent 4.5 inches
0.8 percent 4.75 inches
4.2 percent 5 inches
4.4 percent 5.25 inches
10.7 percent 5.5 inches
percent length
8 percent 5.75 inches
23.9 percent 6 inches
8.8 percent 6.25 inches
14.3 percent 6.5 inches
5.7 percent 6.75 inches
9.5 percent 7 inches
1.8 percent 7.25 inches
2.9 percent 7.5 inches
percent length
1 percent 7.75 inches
1 percent 8 inches
0.3 percent 8.25 inches
0.3 percent 8.5 inches
0.1 percent 8.75 inches
0.1 percent 9 inches

 

[Gluteus Maximus]

I'd want to have legs small enough that, when my genitalia is tumescent, I really could lean forward and be like a tripod without sustaining too much damage to the tip of the herman gelmet.

So that'll be 1 inch legs then... boom boom.

 

[Meade's Ball]

I'd want to have legs small enough that, when my genitalia is tumescent, I really could lean forward and be like a tripod without sustaining too much damage to the tip of the herman gelmet.

Plus ladies love little fellas: no-one ever thought that someone 6'2'' was "sweet".

6ft 2 might have well strong arms though, which ladies well like when they wake with their eyes half-open, unbloody and free.

 

[Man of Harveys]

So that'll be 1 inch legs then... boom boom.

You big hairy boy

 

[Chicken Run]

how funny

 

[Caveman]

how funny

Well put it back in its pants then.