[Football] Your Schadenfreude Wish List For Next Season

[el punal]

Here we go, all the unfortunate things that can happen to those Premier League teams you despise, dislike, envy - you get the drift. So, in no particular order, I would love the following to happen :

Newcastle to spend billions on overpriced, past their best players who all fail miserably. The team implodes, Smuggy gets sacked and they get relegated.

Leeds to be Champions of Europe as they enjoy another stint in the Championship in 2023/24 season.

We stuff Man Utd at Old Trafford 5-0 with Maguire sent off for retaliation after being nutted by Lewis Dunk.

Haaland not scoring a goal all season.

Grealish getting transferred after parking his car in the Manchester Ship Canal.

Southampton to be relegated because it’s about time and I can gloat mercilessly.

There are loads more but I’ll leave them up to you to choose.

 

[pasty]

Pep sacked for not winning the CL for Citeh. Again.

 

[Icy Gull]

Aston Villa in a relegation batttle

 

[Frankworthington]

Roy Keane to be appointed new Manure manager in January, sack entire back room staff, transfer-list entire first team squad and drive De shea to the airport personally.

Dirty Leeds to be relegated of course

 

[happypig]

Someone high up in the FA says something blasphemous to Muslims and all the Arabs sell their clubs and buy F1 teams instead.

 

[Goldstone1976]

Sami Hyypia appointed manager of Palace.

 

[Stat Brother]

Despite his guaranteed 6 points from us, I'd still like to see Stevie G fail the best!
Obviously closely followed by Frank, but deffo Gerrard first, for absolutely no apparent reason.

 

[deletebeepbeepbeep]

Qatar WC called off due to extreme heat wave.

Newcastle to finish in bottom half despite massive investment.

 

[jakarta]

Leeds, Newcastle and the Scum all relegated...

 

[A1X]

Massive financial irregularities being uncovered at all the big 6, Palace, Leeds, Villa, Newcastle and West Ham, causing all of them to be kicked out of the football league and barred from re-entry.

 

[lawros left foot]

Palace, Dirty Leeds,Villa,Bournemouth, Southampton all go into the last game of the season with exactly the same points and goal difference in the bottom 5 places.
Only 2 can stay up.
Viera leaves Palace mid season with Palace seemingly safe in 10 place,and Pardew returns, and works his magic.

Bielsa returns to the Dirties,in a Champions League place only to not win another game.

 

[Jeremiah]

Palace's new stand is built but due to oversight is built facing away from the pitch. However It wins numerous awards for Care In The Community.

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

Leeds Newcastle and Bournemouth all relegated.
Ten Hag to fail miserably at the start of the season and get sacked by Man Utd, who go on to finish in the bottom half - that is more about Man Utd than Ten Hag.
Aston Villa to struggle and Gerrard sacked.

 

[Weststander]

Newcastle, Everton and Citeh investigated by UEFA and banned from European competitions. Then enforced.

(Yes, Newcastle's European football is a way off, but who cares).

The EPL will do Jack Sh@t of course.

 

[vegster]

Grealish is booked every game for refusing to wear his socks correctly.

" Fans " that abuse and do " wanker " signs at a player taking a corner or throw in ejected.

Club shirts charged at a maximum of £25.

Harry Kane's bootlaces to be tied together by the referee at the start of every match, allowing him just 18" max between feet.

For every hour spent by a player being tattooed they must spend 10 hours practicing free kicks, penalties and corners.

 

[Happy Exile]

Everton get investigated for financial irregularities and docked points that guarantees relegation.

Citeh knocked out of the Champions League because of a Grealish own goal. Ideally one that's awarded via VAR after the final whistle has gone and they're already celebrating a win.

The tactical falling over Wolves to backfire horribly, be ignored by the ref so Lamptey runs from one of the pitch to the other and scores

Man United and Arsenal to fail to make the top 10

Also Leicester to play Derby in a cup, just to see Rooney and Vardy

 

[studio150]

Southampton to continue their record of losing games 0-9
Zaha finally gets his dream move away from Palace, and promptly goes into a season long sulk as he doesn't like being a small fish in a big pond
The top 6 all fail to gain their normal level of favourable VAR/referee decisions which results in each manager moaning after every game

 

[Barnet Seagull]

I dont generally wish ill for any fans. It would however be agreeable to see Lampard and Gerrard underwhelm. Viera too ofc.

 

[GT49er]

For every hour spent by a player being tattooed they must spend 10 hours practicing free kicks, penalties and corners.

Yep, I'll second that one!

 

[Eeyore]

Newcastle, Everton and Citeh investigated by UEFA and banned from European competitions. Then enforced.

(Yes, Newcastle's European football is a way off, but who cares).

The EPL will do Jack Sh@t of course.

I think they've banned themselves.