Ok, I was in junior school St Marys in Dachet, aged I think 8, I had a bad case of Diarrhoea, so bad I had to be taken home by the only member of staff not taking lesson, yes the headmaster in his brand new Austin Allegro…..
Yes I did, pooped on the back seat….
my dad gave me a pound note, when he got home from work as a reward.
Is that a really long way of saying the strangest place you took a dump is in err….. a toilet?!
Gary Lineker once let loose on a football pitch in Italy if I recall correctly.
Whilst early morning fishing one Sunday on Southwick beach not too far from Carats Cafe I was caught rather short. Too early for the public loos to be open, it was mid tide but the sea was rising so I positioned my self close to the concrete sea defences, sometimes known as the Dragons Teeth, and dropped something that would also hinder the oceans upwards progress. Once complete I kicked a pile of shingle over the offender safe in the knowledge that the tide would wash it away.
The fishing was crap so I moved onto the Shoreham East Arm for an hour to see if things would improve. No luck so by about 8am I packed up my tackle and made my way beck to the car park at Carats. As I passed the scene of crime I was horrified to see a young couple canoodling (maybe post nightclub) on pretty mush the exact spot where I had earlier crouched down. I made a hurried exit!
An old Oppo of mine broke into Prince Andrew’s cabin, when Andy was Flight commander on Edinburgh and curled one down in his boot locker.
Wasn't it Mexico, or am I getting senile?
Never managed to find out if bears actually do shit in the woods, but ultrarunners do, often. Be careful when walking though any clumps of trees on the South Downs
Wimbledon Centre Court