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The I HATE Haloween thread.



portlock seagull

Well-known member
Jul 28, 2003
17,776
Ever since I was in Salem for Hallowean a couple of years back, I've really embraced it like the Americans do so well. Lots of fun, and we have as many decorations as for Xmas nearly. I love it and the missus gets loads of sweets in which I get to eat if kids don't knock on the door. Win Win! But they will, because our front garden is the epitome of spooky tonight, I've done it all up and it looks great! Even the spiders have done their bit with a massive cobweb by the front door.......:p
 




clapham_gull

Legacy Fan
Aug 20, 2003
25,876
Silly imported money making exercise.

Unfortunately the kids round here take it a bit too seriously and I'll probably get my front door covered in eggs again.

Along with "bake offs" and "secret santa", straight into Room 101 for me.
 


portlock seagull

Well-known member
Jul 28, 2003
17,776
Neeeeeh, children in need stay in need. What a load of old misery gits some of you are!!
 




Herr Tubthumper

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
62,683
The Fatherland
I hate how Haloween is used an excuse for women to dress like total slags :censored:

.....if such women knock on my door I think I'd ask for a trick then.
 






Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
43,093
Lancing
I have just popped down to Southwick Square and there were hoardes of the EVIL monsters. Why is it 8 year old Girls go out dressed as WHORES wearing mini skirts and fish net stockings ?. Is a Paedo's dream this night I tell you. Why do parents let them go out dressed like that ?.
 


patchamalbion

Well-known member
Feb 26, 2009
6,020
brighton
I have just popped down to Southwick Square and there were hoardes of the EVIL monsters. Why is it 8 year old Girls go out dressed as WHORES wearing mini skirts and fish net stockings ?. Is a Paedo's dream this night I tell you. Why do parents let them go out dressed like that ?.

none at the door yet then US? iv had three but all good natured so far
 




portlock seagull

Well-known member
Jul 28, 2003
17,776
Just had a massive group of approx 15 kids with couple of adults all in costumes. Opened the door slowly with Mussorsky's night on a bare mountain playing - they loved it, what with all the flaming candles shadowing the tress in the front garden as they walked up the path! Got horror film etc for later, happy hallows eve!!
 


Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
43,093
Lancing
Nothing yet I am glad to reprt but I expected the traffic to be 7pm-9pm No doubt when John and Edward will be performing on the X Factor :mad:. God I'am a Sad Miserable Fucker nowadays aren't I ?. Whats happened to me ?
 


portlock seagull

Well-known member
Jul 28, 2003
17,776
Nothing yet I am glad to reprt but I expected the traffic to be 7pm-9pm No doubt when John and Edward will be performing on the X Factor :mad:. God I'am a Sad Miserable Fucker nowadays aren't I ?. Whats happened to me ?

:lolol::bigwave:
 




Right stop knocking on the f***ing door!!! I have just had two kids virtually boot the door in, what the f*** is wrong with knocking:mad:, and then after I didn't answer for about two minutes checked if they were there and was greeted with two pairs of beady eyes steering through the letter box as if they were going to pilfer the car keys or something. I then shouted "f*** off" and they accordingly scarpered and as they did I realized they were about 14 years old and they were also extreme pikeys, the hills have eyes type pikeys, and I came to the conclusion that they would come back.

15 minutes later they return and begin to continuously ring the doorbell, all 24 patriotic and down right ridiculous songs that it plays!!! After what seemed like an eternity of "God save the queen" in door bell dialogue they shouted "we know your in" quite stupidly as saying that I thought they were going to camp over night just to get there hands on a mangy snickers, which was all I had to offer, but no they left.

I hate halloween as it violates what Saturday is all about... having a football dominated day and then choosing which reality TV program you are going to sarcastically rip the piss out of. BAN HALLOWEEN!!!

Mints UP THE ALBION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 


patchamalbion

Well-known member
Feb 26, 2009
6,020
brighton
im expecting the patcham pikeys to start moving between the hours of 19.30 and 21.00 so thats when i may have to use the egg launching devise i have created from my girlfriends bra. failing that il just run at the sods
 


C1 BHA

Well-known member
Jul 5, 2003
1,680
Wiltshire
Can I just say that I'm sure US is my secret twin brother. I seem to agree with EVERY single word he types (made me laugh out loud, thanks US) :drink:
 








Bry Nylon

Test your smoke alarm
Helpful Moderator
Jul 21, 2003
20,572
Playing snooker
God I'am a Sad Miserable Fucker nowadays aren't I ?. Whats happened to me ?

Not at all Uncle. I have all the lights at the front of my house turned out.
And should any chavvy teenagers rattle my door knocker tonight, demanding sweets with menaces, I shall have no hesitation in kicking their sorry arses all the way up the street.
 


Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
43,093
Lancing
Quite extraordinary. 8pm and not one fucker has called yet. Maybe the Close knows I am a miserable fucker and by passed my House :tantrum:.

Oh whats wrong with me your BASTARDS :censored:
 






Spanish Seagulls

Well-known member
Nov 18, 2007
2,915
Ladbroke Grove
Quite extraordinary. 8pm and not one fucker has called yet. Maybe the Close knows I am a miserable fucker and by passed my House .

Oh whats wrong with me your BASTARDS

Erm.........am I missing something, didn't you start this thread? Something tells me that you love it all really & are only upset because nobody has come round to play apple bobbin or whatever it is you play on halloween..... Go on admit it, you just don't like it cos they left you out last year too..........hee hee
 


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