Sussex Towns Slogans

[Bwian]

Welcome to Falmer-Twinned with Falmer across the by-pass.

 

[Bwian]

Lewes Welcomes You-unless you're one of those football supporting oiks who want to destroy the AONB that is that useless muddy field outside of our boundaries and f**king miles away from the rat infested duck pond. Have a nice day.

 

[Sonic]

Brighton - 'We are a city, Honest!'

Peacehaven - 'Stop and live here if you're too incontinent to make it to Eastbourne'.

 

[Marc]

Chichester - We Wanna Be Portsmouth

Rustington - Other towns get twinned with shite from Europe, we're twinned with a town from California! (true too)

Bognor Regis - We have a Butlins...'nuff said!

Aldrington - We have a train station but appear to have no town or village!

 

[Lady Whistledown]

"Moulescoomb welcomes you....if you dare."

"Cardiff: it might be trendy but it's still in Wales".

"Rotherham, Proud Home of the Chuckle Brothers"

"Middlesbrough: takes your breath away (free smog masks to all residents)"

 

[aftershavedave]

hanover / southover area of brighton:

"welcome to muesli mountain"

 

[Everest]

Bevendean - "Bev 'n' Dean welcome you"

 

[The Large One]

Beachy He.......... arrrgghh.

 

[Lady Whistledown]

Beachy He.......... arrrgghh.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

'Haywards Heath? Contempt? Beneath!'

 

[MRRF 10]

Sompting "We dont actually exist"

hey.

Lancing

"we think we act hard, because we can write our names on walls"
"do you know anywhere that sells burberry?"
"if you find any where pleasant and unvandalised, please see a doctor"

 

[Seagull Stew]

Eastbourne - The place to come when you're ready to die
Bexhill - The place to come when you're already dead
Sidley - Lock your doors, close your windows and pray!

 

[MRRF 10]

Lancing- "are you really this desperate?"

 

[Bob!]

Angmering on Sea - We are NOT East Preston

 

[Hunting 784561]

Kemp Town

"You dont have to be gay to live here....but it helps !"

 

[Mental Lental]

Goring

"Boring."

Fishersgate

"You have just entered The Twilight Zone"

 

[perseus]

Burpham: Excuse me

Lots of hams around. In Israel it would be called "white meat".

 

[Windmill]

Birling Gap - the hotel at the end of the Universe.
Uckfield - home of the 'flagship' rail service.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Peacehaven - 'The Land That Trains Forgot'
Littlehampton - 'Home Of The Small Penis'

 

[Lord Cornwallis]

FINDON......You've just past it.
WORTHING......Gods waitingroom.