Pidgeons / Seagulls

[MikeySmall]

Any ideas of how I can stop these fuckers from shitting on my car daily? They seem to have taken residence in the tree above my drive mainly due to the fact that the council has chopped down most trees nearby

 

[Napper]

Rent a garage

 

[Horsham Gull]

 

[Everest]

Sell the car

 

[MikeySmall]

Sell the car

Then they'll just shit on my drive.

 

[zefarelly]

correct answer

they're both flying rats. Along with grey squirrels, crows, jays, and magpies your quite entitled to murder the fuckers on your own patch

I'm considering investing in a pest control unit myself, a car can be washed, but indigenous bird life is being savaged daily, and, amongst others, great tits need protecting

 

[MikeySmall]

correct answer

they're both flying rats. Along with grey squirrels, crows, jays, and magpies your quite entitled to murder the fuckers on your own patch

I'm considering investing in a pest control unit myself, a car can be washed, but indigenous bird life is being savaged daily, and, amongst others, great tits need protecting

The problem is that id probably take out half the house over the other side of the road. Needs are must though....

 

[Gully]

Zefarelly makes a very good point, pigeons are vermin...treat them as such. I have two who keep trying to nest in my garden, this year the blackbirds have stayed away for the first time since I moved here, I find that attacking them with a garden hoe dissuades them for a bit.

 

[MikeySmall]

Zefarelly makes a very good point, pigeons are vermin...treat them as such. I have two who keep trying to nest in my garden, this year the blackbirds have stayed away for the first time since I moved here, I find that attacking them with a garden hoe dissuades them for a bit.

I was told to put 'fake' snakes on the car roof to scare them off..... Must actually give this a try.

 

[pasty]

correct answer

they're both flying rats. Along with grey squirrels, crows, jays, and magpies your quite entitled to murder the fuckers on your own patch

I'm considering investing in a pest control unit myself, a car can be washed, but indigenous bird life is being savaged daily, and, amongst others, great tits need protecting

Get one of these. Wash the car, and shoot the wild life at the same time.

PS. I HIGHLY recomend ensuring either a: your missus is not about, or b: turning safe search ON before googling images of "super squirter"

 

[Stoo82]

Hang CD's from the branches. Birds hate shiny things. Well, thats what they do over here anyway, seems to work.

 

[Stoo82]

 

[zefarelly]

I was told to put 'fake' snakes on the car roof to scare them off..... Must actually give this a try.

be careful waving your snake about in public, its frowned upon these days

as for resting it on a hot tin roof

 

[MikeySmall]

be careful waving your snake about in public, its frowned upon these days

as for resting it on a hot tin roof

Willy windmills are all the rage no

 

[Barrel of Fun]

There was an article in the Argus online today about somebody "shooting dead seagulls". Why you would want to shoot dead seagulls is beyond me. Live ones, definitely.

I used to get in trouble with my previous workplace for keeping an 'unkempt hire car', but there was nothing I could do to stop the feral bastards standing on the top of it and shitting.

I reckon the best bet is to get a cheap cover for the car, but I would have looked even more of a prat than I already do 'tucking in' my Nissan Micra SPORT.

 

[withdeanwombat]

Lose the tree.

 

[KNC]

Leave the seagulls put of it. They don't roost in trees.

 

[middletoenail]

Talking of pigeons, I left my balcony door open when I went to work today because I didn't want to come back to a sauna. On my return I walked into my kitchen to find shit and feathers everywhere, and I mean EVERYWHERE!

 

[zefarelly]

Icarus etc?

 

[jmsc]

your quite entitled to murder the fuckers on your own patch

I'm considering investing in a pest control unit myself, a car can be washed, but indigenous bird life is being savaged daily

*AHEM* you're not entitled to 'murder the fuckers' - herring gulls are a protected species, they are also an indigenous bird life that has been here a lot longer than you!