[Misc] Older Dads

[The Grockle]

Found out quite recently that I am expecting my second child, all going well he/she will arrive a few months after my 41st birthday.

Genuinely didn't think i'd have the chance again at 40 and am over the moon but naturally a bit worried about being the older Dad in the playground. My Dad was 45 when he had me and it definitely bothered him more than it did me!

Any other 'older' Dad's out there have any tips or experiences?

 

[spongy]

I was 36 and 41 when I had my kids.

Just do as you do. No one really bats an eyelid. Certainly no stigma attached to it .

And even if there is I'm of an age where I couldn't give a crap what others think anyway.

Enjoy being a dad again. Although the night feeds and lack of sleep was definitely harder for my second being a bit older.

 

[The Grockle]

I was 36 and 41 when I had my kids.

Just do as you do. No one really bats an eyelid. Certainly no stigma attached to it .

And even if there is I'm of an age where I couldn't give a crap what others think anyway.

Enjoy being a dad again. Although the night feeds and lack of sleep was definitely harder for my second being a bit older.

Quite similar to me, I was 33 when I had my daughter and am definitely a bit conscious of being older than a lot of the other parents at her school. Probably says more about my age complex than anything else!

 

[wunt be druv]

I was over 40 when my youngest daughter was born, loved every second of it, gave me a whole new outlook on life, helps keep me young and encourages me to look after myself and she is a fanatical Albion supporter and goes to all the matches with me, home and away!

 

[BrightonCottager]

I was 45 when we had our daughter, so I was always one of the older dads in the playground, although it is becoming more common now. But it never really bothered me because I enjoyed doing active things with her - playing football, cricket, Frisbee, stuff like that and taking her to Fulham, museums, the beach. In fact, she's said multiple times that I did more with her than a lot of her friends' dads. And I think doing all that helped keep me young. A lot of people say she's 'mature for her age' and I think that's a product of having older parents.

So my advice is: don't worry and embrace the chance to keep active.

 

[Brian Fantana]

My kids are 4 and 7. I'd say the majority of the dads in their respective classes are in their mid-40s, so you certainly wouldn't really stand out.

 

[tricky]

I was 40 when I had my daughter. Don't really notice any difference and theres plenty of other parents who look to be around the same age. I actually think its better as the older dads seem a good laugh and more up for a drink, whereas the younger parents still have enough of a social scene and don't really seem to engage with others at the school.

 

[Mental Lental]

Dad at 45. I think that's borderline the oldest you can be to make the conscious decision to have a kid. If the kid hits adulthood right about retirement age I think you're good. In my humble opinion.

 

[kojak]

Found out quite recently that I am expecting my second child, all going well he/she will arrive a few months after my 41st birthday.

Genuinely didn't think i'd have the chance again at 40 and am over the moon but naturally a bit worried about being the older Dad in the playground. My Dad was 45 when he had me and it definitely bothered him more than it did me!

Any other 'older' Dad's out there have any tips or experiences?

I bet your glad you moved to Bournemouth

 

[Guinness Boy]

Yep, I was 39 when I had my youngest but a lot of parent mates I made from their school were similar ages. For six seasons I went to and from Albion games with one of them and his son and they had STs in the row behind me. We had a 'Dad's Drinking Club' too and most were my age, one a bit older.

Another friend of mine had kids with his (younger than him) second wife when he was in his 50s. He's primary carer, being semi-retired and loving it.

You'll be fine OP.

 

[bhafc99]

Dad at 42 and 46. (Missus is 10 years younger than me.)

Never been bothered, no-one’s ever commented a thing, you don’t have anything to worry about for even a second.

Enjoy it. Treasure it.

 

[The Grockle]

I bet your glad you moved to Bournemouth

I live in Poole now but it's a area to live, also until quite recently it was very affordable.

It feels more like a city than a town and is surrounded by some stunning countryside.

The only downside is that it's a right pig to get to home games without driving.

 

[Miami Seagull]

I was 47 when my son was born. Definitely keeps me young, and he is 11 now and for me it's been a new lease of life. I am away a lot and so I've learnt how to play some of the online games with him so we can stay connected each day, and it is great. As I said, keeps me feeling younger and it's been wonderful.

 

[North of Robertsbridge]

Another late dad here. A plus side is that with the mortgage paid off we could fund her through two degrees without asking her to take out a student loan. The downside is doing that sort of ruled out early retirement, not that that was the plan

 

[Insel affe]

I always said if I do not have kids before I was 40, that was it, the snip was in order.
at 39 and a half I got the surprise news, damn so close......

At the time we owned a one bedroom flat in the heart of Camden, best thing that ever happened to me.
Moved back home to Brighton, swapped a flat for a house, stopped drinking and gigging as much, piled on the weight (eating left overs )

Changed so much for the better, watched a little one grow up, she was at the first game at the Amex, was with me as Pedro jumped into the crowd right in front of us, and now plays at the Elite centre for the girls team. To be honest, it feels like a dream, I have lost the weight and going to a lot more gigs again after 14 years, I did not miss much, even though at times I thought I was.

One of the best moment of my life was I had not seen her for about three weeks when she was 9 as she went to America with her mum for a longer holiday, when I arrived at the airport to spend another two weeks, she ran up to me jumped on me, crying and hugged me so hard and long, I started to cry, I must have been doing something right, those moments are worth anything.

Look forward to it fella, and don't worry about being "an older dad" age is just a number, you have much more wisdom to offer than a twenty year old.

Congratulations

 

[The Grockle]

I was 47 when my son was born. Definitely keeps me young, and he is 11 now and for me it's been a new lease of life. I am away a lot and so I've learnt how to play some of the online games with him so we can stay connected each day, and it is great. As I said, keeps me feeling younger and it's been wonderful.

My Dad was a couple of years younger when he had me. A few of mates were shocked that he could remember the war ending but him being the older Dad never bothered me in the slightest.

 

[Berty23]

I was looking at trendlines yesterday for work and the proportion of people becoming a parent before they are 30 has nosedived in the last decade. Older parents are not anything unusual. One of my best mates is 49 and just had his first kid (his mrs is mid 30s) and he is loving it.

Stay active and have fun.

 

[Gwylan]

I'm slightly different as my kids are adopted. But I was just a couple of months shy of my 50th birthday when we welcomed a 3 year old and a 1 year old to our house.

TBH, I don't think age made a difference to me, I can't think of anything that I couldn't do with the kids that my own dad did,: I played football, cricket, went ice skating, carried them on my shoulders etc. If anything, they kept me feeling young.

 

[Sirnormangall]

Congratulations. I had my last / youngest at 48. Don’t let it worry you - you won’t be the oldest Dad in the playground.

 

[Weststander]

I was 37 and 40. A middling parental age at our kids schools, loads especially Dad’s were much, much older. Just a couple of parents in their 20’s.

Depends on the local demographic.

No personal or energy issues with being a Dad in my forties/early fifties, but playing football was never my thing. Instead I created an amazing lawn for it!