Mattock

[Willy Dangle]

Ok, a strange injury is what the word is. The press conference with Gus caused a chuckle or two. Obviously something embarrising?

What can our broadminded NSC fellows speculate on?.

Got caught dogging by his Mrs and she slammed it in the car door!

 

[fire&skill]

 

[Bob!]

Ok, a steange injury is what the word is. .......

Nope, have googled it, ckecked wiki, resorted to a Dictionary, I still don't know.

What is steange?

 

[Sheebo]

We've had this already - He has a swollen left testicle from a groin / pull. They sometimes go purple.

 

[SeagullSongs]

We've had this already - He has a swollen left testicle from a groin / pull. They sometimes go purple.

I haven't.

 

[Silent Bob]

We've had this already - He has a swollen left testicle from a groin / pull. They sometimes go purple.

Is he going to be better by Saturday?

 

[Sheebo]

I haven't.

If you've never had it just be grateful - It's very painful and feels like you're lugging a sack or marbles around...

Is he going to be better by Saturday?

Depends. Often if ones swollen it can put pressure on the other and cause swelling with that one. In this case if this happens we'll be back to square one with the right testicle becoming the problem.

 

[Silent Bob]

If you've never had it just be grateful - It's very painful and feels like you're lugging a sack or marbles around...



Depends. Often if ones swollen it can put pressure on the other and cause swelling with that one. In this case if this happens we'll be back to square one with the right testicle becoming the problem.

Well it sounds terrible, especially the bit about the square one. Ouch.

 

[One Robbie Reinelt]

If you've never had it just be grateful - It's very painful and feels like you're lugging a sack or marbles around...



Depends. Often if ones swollen it can put pressure on the other and cause swelling with that one. In this case if this happens we'll be back to square one with the right testicle becoming the problem.

I've never heard such bollocks in my whole life!!!!!!

 

[severnside gull]

this is a very cruel thread but at least it serves to put people straight who were calling Mattock a prick for missing Tuesday's match. That was clearly a load of bollocks

 

[Deleted User X18H]

Ok, a strange injury is what the word is. The press conference with Gus caused a chuckle or two. Obviously something embarrising?

What can our broadminded NSC fellows speculate on?.

Got caught dogging by his Mrs and she slammed it in the car door!

no laughing at the press conference it's not allowed.

 

[HastingsSeagull]

Not a driving price down for next season plan then shame

 

[Dalos]

The Argus has a little piece on this today. Apparently Mattock hurt himself whilst partaking in a little bit of male grooming. The next sentence went on to call him "Razor sharp full back..." so make your own conclusions

I think there is a chant in this though for tomorrow

" Hes got no hair but we dont care, Joey Joey Mattock"

 

[Mellotron]

Purplebollockitis.

 

[Simster]

I just hope he's back for tomorrow as he's far better than any of our other full backs.

 

[Nathan]

Er...maybe not...

 

[Sheebo]

I've never heard such bollocks in my whole life!!!!!!

this is a very cruel thread but at least it serves to put people straight who were calling Mattock a prick for missing Tuesday's match. That was clearly a load of bollocks

Purplebollockitis.

hahahaha must admit to laughing my head off when I read the Argus today and found out it was actually his bollock(s)

 

[Willy Dangle]

Would it be in poor taste to have 18,000 people singing 'Theres only one Joe Mattock' in a high pitched voice.

 

[The Fifth Column]

His balls are round
They're inches off the ground
Joe Mattock
Joe Mattock

Or

he shaves them there
he shaves them there (To the tune, there's no-one there)

 

[Ninja Elephant]

His ball was on fire,
His ball was on fireeee,
Joe Mattock,
His ball was on fire.