Lunchtime DILEMMA

[SeagullSongs]

You use a POTATO PEELER for a KIWI?

I use a grapefruit spoon, with nicely serrated pokey end bits.

This. I only have one to eat kiwis, and it's the only way I'll eat them. Every home needs one.

 

[chucky1973]

i just bite the top of and squeeze all the fruit out...........easy.

 

[tinycowboy]

You can't have too many potato peelers. We have two different types (as well as an old style one). And still ready to resort to a small sharp knife if required.

I learnt the hard way that a pound shop peeler is a false economy. If I can, I always push the boat out a little bit when buying minor kitchen utensils.

 

[Pavilionaire]

One for the older members, but I feel certain if you were stopped and frisked by a policeman he would have nothing but admiration for your crime prevention intentions. It was, after all, Police 5's own Shaw Taylor who used to advise us to "Keep 'em peeled!"

 

[seagullsovergrimsby]

If you get stopped by OB just tell them you're a trainee Rabbi and the potato peeler is used for practice circumcisions.

 

[bhabloke]

You are in possession of a potato peeler. This is not an offensive weapon, unless you INTEND to use it to cause injury. An offensive weapon is either made/adapted or intended to cause injury. An example would be a knuckle duster is MADE to cause injury and therefore is an offensive weapon. A celery stick could be if you have INTENT to use it to cause injury. Bladed articles come under separate legislation.

 

[Easy 10]

...And eat it like I would a BOILED EGG.

Up until recently, this is EXACTLY how I would consume my kiwi (but I don't have the luxury of a serrated spoon, I'd just cut it in half and scoop the seedy green flesh into my gaping maw).

But on March 6th of this year, I had an epiphany. Thats not an obscure tropical fruit, its a posh word for a new way of thinking.
I was dissatisfied with the amount of kiwi wastage which was occurring through devouring it through the "boiled egg" method. So being in a devil-may-care mood that day (I felt Philip Schofield had been overly dismissive on that days edition of This Morning regarding an item about some important conservation issues surrounding the dismantling of an aircraft hanger in Wisbech), I took a knife and sliced the two extreme ends of the kiwi off. The "stumps", if you will. I then took my trusty potato peeler, and carefully flayed its furry coat from its body, before cutting the exposed green pod neatly into 4 quarters, and consuming.

The results were nothing short of SENSATIONAL. I can't recommend it enough.

Anyway, I've eaten it. I still need a new one though, and the greengrocers is a good 150 yards from the office. I guess I'll just have to run the gauntlet.

 

[Easy 10]

You are in possession of a potato peeler. This is not an offensive weapon, unless you INTEND to use it to cause injury. An offensive weapon is either made/adapted or intended to cause injury. An example would be a knuckle duster is MADE to cause injury and therefore is an offensive weapon. A celery stick could be if you have INTENT to use it to cause injury. Bladed articles come under separate legislation.

But like that grey area in giving a red card, or a penalty, how do you prove INTENT ?

Its a minefield. Where's Diana when you need her.

 

[Everest]

If you do get stopped, tell them you're a surgeon. You always carry a peeler in case you come across an accident and the unfortunate person needs an emergency skin graft that won't wait til they get to hospital.

 

[KZNSeagull]

I learnt the hard way that a pound shop peeler is a false economy. If I can, I always push the boat out a little bit when buying minor kitchen utensils.

On this subject, can you confirm that modern tin openers are all rubbish, or is it just the ones we get here (ie made in China)? I think we are getting through 1 a month at the moment (and we don't open many tins).

 

[Deleted member 18477]

Banana, apple, satsuma, grapes, berries... Stick to the easy fruits when not at home!

Simple as that!

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

I learnt the hard way that a pound shop peeler is a false economy. If I can, I always push the boat out a little bit when buying minor kitchen utensils.

Wise words my friend.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

I had this thread recommended to me a short while ago. Was the reward worth the perseverance? Yes it was.

Keeping a duplicate supply of useful equipment at work is highly recommended. In my office I have a bicycle puncture repair kit, bowl, spoon, fork, antiperspirant, nail scissors, corkscrew, sandpaper, spare suit, spare shoes, a couple of ties, brolly, cough sweets, aspirin, neurofen and (rarely required, but essential for avoiding an embarrassment that colleagues will revisit for as long as my arse points downward), a box of Tesco's loperamide.

 

[Barrow Boy]

Easy, has nobody at work taken this golden opportunity to utter the classic line,
"Is that a potato peeler in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me"?

 

[Sergei's Celebration]

Welcome back Harry Wilsons Tackle!

Great to know Easy's peeler has pulled you out of retirement.

 

[Easy 10]

Easy, has nobody at work taken this golden opportunity to utter the classic line,
"Is that a potato peeler in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me"?

No, not yet.

Although someone this morning said "can you not stand quite so close please, its making me uncomfortable".

I don't know what the problem was, it was clear he'd almost finished.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

It was irresistible. And thanks for the man-hug. As Bozza said to me back in 2003 when I joined this interweb chat forum: "let the games begin". And as the announcer on the 7.28 to St Pancras International often says to me, apologies for the slight delay. . . . .

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

I had this thread recommended to me a short while ago. Was the reward worth the perseverance? Yes it was.

Keeping a duplicate supply of useful equipment at work is highly recommended. In my office I have a bicycle puncture repair kit, bowl, spoon, fork, antiperspirant, nail scissors, corkscrew, sandpaper, spare suit, spare shoes, a couple of ties, brolly, cough sweets, aspirin, neurofen and (rarely required, but essential for avoiding an embarrassment that colleagues will revisit for as long as my arse points downward), a box of Tesco's loperamide.

I always wondered what was in those boxes you see people carrying out of the building when the business goes belly-up.

 

[tubaman]

It sounds as though you religiously eat fruit. So its easy.........you have a reasonable excuse for being in possession of a peeler because you're carrying it for religious purposes.

 

[HastingsSeagull]

Peel it BEFORE going to work?

Or else use a knife and Spoon like normal people! That said I will now be trying to peel a kewi for sh8ts and giggles as just bought another load from Morrison's today