#jokeduan

[narly101]

My wife has packed her bags and left me because I can't control my pasta fetish.

I'm feeling cannelloni right now.

 

[Rugrat]

Fella bumps into his mate who's carrying a sack

"What you got in that sack Murphy?"
"Chickens" he replies
"I wouldn't mind a chicken, if I can guess how many you've got can I have one of them?"
"Ha Ha, If you can guess how many I've got you can have both of them"

 

[Notters]

Joke d'annee non?

 

[The Sock of Poskett]

How do you confuse a dentist?
Candy floss.

 

[Jack Straw]

My wife has packed her bags and left me because I can't control my pasta fetish.

I'm feeling cannelloni right now.

Do you have any other matrimony problems as leaving you because of a pasta fetish seems very harsh. What harm are you doing? If she really loves you, she would support you with your pasta passion. Perhaps you're better off without her?

 

[Questions]

My wife has packed her bags and left me because I can't control my pasta fetish.

I'm feeling cannelloni right now.

Mine would never do fettuccine for me although she never minded when I did farfalle for her.

 

[mr sheen]

My wife has packed her bags and left me because I can't control my pasta fetish.

I'm feeling cannelloni right now.

I told my wife I'd made a car from spaghetti. She didn't believe me until I drove pasta.

 

[Questions]

"I'll have a consonant please Carol, and a vowel, and a consonant...."

My wife hates dishing up my alphabetti spaghetti

 

[AmexRuislip]

My wife said she was in the mood for something a bit unusual in the bedroom tonight.
So I dragged the dishwasher up there.

 

[Acker79]

Do you have any other matrimony problems as leaving you because of a pasta fetish seems very harsh. What harm are you doing? If she really loves you, she would support you with your pasta passion. Perhaps you're better off without her?

Given his response to her leaving was to go fondle pasta, I'm not entirely convinced there needs to be other problems. That's indicative of someone who has serous self control issues as well as a weird perversion.

 

[Acker79]

Fella bumps into his mate who's carrying a sack

"What you got in that sack Murphy?"
"Chickens" he replies
"I wouldn't mind a chicken, if I can guess how many you've got can I have one of them?"
"Ha Ha, If you can guess how many I've got you can have both of them"

That's seems rather generous. I wonder what Murphy was doing with the chickens. Was he trying to get rid of them? Has Fella been sold a pup, so to speak?

How do you confuse a dentist?
Candy floss.

That would confuse most people. The answer doesn't seem to fit the question. It seems like it would confuse whoevver you're asking the question of, because Candy Foss is a delightful, fluffy fair ground snack, not a method of confusion.

I told my wife I'd made a car from spaghetti. She didn't believe me until I drove pasta.

Did she see you driving this pasta? And since you say you drove pasta, not spaghetti, does that mean you used other types of pasta in this car you made? If so, isn't she right to not believe you.

If not, how much spaghetti did you need to use? A single strand is very brittle, so to create a vehicle that could hold the weight of even a small human being would require a large amount of reinforcement, sticking large numbers of strands together. It is a very impressive feat of engineering. Does the petrol not soften the pasta and ruin the integrity of the structure?

My wife said she was in the mood for something a bit unusual in the bedroom tonight.
So I dragged the dishwasher up there.

Seems like a lot of work, you could have just carried a microwave up, instead. Also, I think you might need to got for marriage therapy, I think you might have communication problems.

 

[AmexRuislip]

That's seems rather generous. I wonder what Murphy was doing with the chickens. Was he trying to get rid of them? Has Fella been sold a pup, so to speak?



That would confuse most people. The answer doesn't seem to fit the question. It seems like it would confuse whoevver you're asking the question of, because Candy Foss is a delightful, fluffy fair ground snack, not a method of confusion.



Did she see you driving this pasta? And since you say you drove pasta, not spaghetti, does that mean you used other types of pasta in this car you made? If so, isn't she right to not believe you.

If not, how much spaghetti did you need to use? A single strand is very brittle, so to create a vehicle that could hold the weight of even a small human being would require a large amount of reinforcement, sticking large numbers of strands together. It is a very impressive feat of engineering. Does the petrol not soften the pasta and ruin the integrity of the structure?



Seems like a lot of work, you could have just carried a microwave up, instead. Also, I think you might need to got for marriage therapy, I think you might have communication problems.

I am glad that I am not a comedian, as I would not want you as a hekkler

 

[Pavilionaire]

My wife has packed her bags and left me because I can't control my pasta fetish.

I'm feeling cannelloni right now.

I can give you the number for the Samaritans, have you got a paper and penne?