[Humour] Joke du jour

[Icy Gull]

The pessimist sees a dark tunnel, the optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel, the realist sees a train approaching, the train driver sees three idiots walking on the track

 

[timbha]

I hope the train driver has time to stop the train before anything nasty happens. What the hell are they doing on the tracks? Idiots!

 

[Brok]

How can the train driver see in the dark?

 

[Bry Nylon]

I've just checked the news and see no mention of this. When did it happen?

 

[zefarelly]

How can the train driver see in the dark?

carrot cake and headlights.

 

[Insel affe]

How can the train driver see in the dark?

He ate his carrots as a kid, stupid.

 

[Bodian]

I hope the train driver has time to stop the train before anything nasty happens. What the hell are they doing on the tracks? Idiots!

It's okay, Jenny Agutter will save them.

 

[Cpt. Spavil]

To me it seems like a strange riddle of some sort.

 

[el punal]

It's okay, Jenny Agutter will save them.

Does she still wear red knickers?

 

[Eeyore]

So realism, pessimism and optimism are in themselves foolish.

What sort of ism is best for avoiding oncoming trains in dark tunnels ?

 

[Bry Nylon]

So realism, pessimism and optimism are in themselves foolish.

What sort of ism is best for avoiding oncoming trains in dark tunnels ?

Hi-vism?

 

[schmunk]

So realism, pessimism and optimism are in themselves foolish.

What sort of ism is best for avoiding oncoming trains in dark tunnels ?

 

[KZNSeagull]

What time is the punchline due to arrive?

 

[Eeyore]

What time is the punchline due to arrive?

Depends if it was a Southern train or not. If so, the punchline has been cancelled.

 

[Pint of Ale and a Burger]

What time is the punchline due to arrive?

I think they said its been delayed due to "trespassers on the railway".
Probably three idiots on the track by the tunnel again.

 

[Jack Straw]

They were chuffed to bits!

 

[jakarta]

So realism, pessimism and optimism are in themselves foolish.

What sort of ism is best for avoiding oncoming trains in dark tunnels ?

Mr Fripp and Mr Byrne give you a selection of isms. You choose.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuuFP8gh2_E

 

[Is it PotG?]

For accuracy:

Despite the myth, carrots are rich in vitamin A, which is important for good vision, as it helps the eye to convert light into a signal that is sent to the brain, helping to make us see in the dark. If someone suffers from a vitamin A deficiency, this may cause night blindness.

However, eating carrots may not improve the eyes of an ordinary healthy person and only make a big difference for someone who suffers from a vitamin A deficiency. Usually, eye problems derive from diabetes or are age-related and cannot be cured by eating carrots. Aside from vitamin A, other nutrients like zinc, vitamin C and E, omega-3 fatty acids are essential for healthy eyes. We can say that the assumption that carrots can improve vision in the dark is half-myth and half-truth.

I would assume that the train driver would have regular health checks, which would include the eyesight.

 

[ConfusedGloryHunter]

I think I understand this one. The answer is the train driver is a realist. If they were a pessimist they would see a disastrous obstacle on the track, if they were an optimist they wouldn't bother looking down the track, so they must be a realist. Do I win a chocolate bar or anything?

 

[Dr Q]

Does she still wear red knickers?

Most likely incontinence knickers now!