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Joke du Jour







Is it PotG?

Thrifty non-licker
Feb 20, 2017
25,506
Sussex by the Sea
I feel it necessary to talk to him before any help arrives for reassurance and comfort at this difficult time, so calling him by his given first name would help significantly.
 


skipper734

Registered ruffian
Aug 9, 2008
9,189
Curdridge
I'd call the Police, as the Elephant is obviously unsupervised.
 




Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
25,517
Worthing
I once shot an elephant in my pyjamas.

I dont usually wear them but on that particular night it was quite chilly.
 




Tim Over Whelmed

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 24, 2007
10,660
Arundel
Wouldn't you call an ambulance but also the RSPCA, Health & Safety Executive, Local Authority and Sky News, or am I missing something?

How's the guys, is he OK?

Why did he have an elephant on his head, surely you can't balance them that well?
 


Jack Straw

I look nothing like him!
Jul 7, 2003
7,120
Brighton. NOT KEMPTOWN!
What do you call a man with an elephant on his head?







An ambulance.

I'm familiar with lots of these "What do call a man/woman with........?" The answer is usually the name of a person, like Russel, Annette, Doug etc. I know a few Ans, but I don't know anyone with the surname, Ambulance. This makes no sense whatsoever.
 


AmexRuislip

Retired Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
34,787
Ruislip
Surely it depends on the size of the elephant's ears, African large and Indian small.
I guess their name is Liza Mininellie :)
 




Two Professors

Two Mad Professors
Jul 13, 2009
7,617
Multicultural Brum
Is this another Jason Lee joke?
 










Eeyore

Colonel Hee-Haw of Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
25,979


Eeyore

Colonel Hee-Haw of Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
25,979
Surely the insinuation is one of wishing to assist the man. On the assumption that he is beyond assistance, given that the over bearing weight has caused him to be deceased, I think such an action lends itself to offering false promise.

If he was alive I would try to coax the elephant off whilst asking someone else to call the ambulance.
 






KZNSeagull

Well-known member
Nov 26, 2007
21,105
Wolsingham, County Durham
Assuming that this incident occurred in the wild, phoning for an ambulance would be pointless since the response times are so long. If the Elephant in question was in captivity then the bloke deserved it.
 


Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
25,517
Worthing
Why was there an elephant in your pyjamas? Are you participating in some illegal drug trial or is it just a general bragging?

No the elephant wasn't in my pyjamas, he was in a pink wincette floral printed ladies nightidress. I was in the pyjamas. It's easy enough surely ?
 


Box of Frogs

Zamoras Left Boot
Oct 8, 2003
4,751
Right here, right now
Surely the elephant wouldn't fit in a standard sized ambulance so a specialist ambulance would be required otherwise only minimal on-site treatment would be able to be rendered and possible transfer to a local animal hospital would be out of the question.
 








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