Joke du Écosse

[Stat Brother]

This years 'Joke of the festival' is:-


I've just deleted all the German names from my phone...






...it's now Hans free.

 

[Albumen]

People are fighting over who said it first.

 

[KZNSeagull]

They haven't got any Dutch or Scandinavian friends then? And how will that stop them crashing whilst driving? They really have not thought this through.

 

[Gwylan]

They haven't got any Dutch or Scandinavian friends then? And how will that stop them crashing whilst driving? They really have not thought this through.

Hans is not a common name in Germany - it's not in the 100 most popular - so most people would not know many Hanses anyway. I don't think he'd have many to delete

[And it's not Joke du Écosse, as Écosse is feminine; so it should be Joke de l'Écosse]

 

[ExmouthExile]

Although I commend you for making the right decision on going hands free, I fail to see the logic in deleting all of your German friends, did they all upset you at once?

 

[Notters]

Hans is not a common name in Germany - it's not in the 100 most popular - so most people would not know many Hanses anyway. I don't think he'd have many to delete

[And it's not Joke du Écosse, as Écosse is feminine; so it should be Joke de l'Écosse]

La blague de L'Écosse, non?

 

[WhingForPresident]

Pretty shit really.

The only one of the top 10 I found mildly amusing was: 2: Stewart Francis: “Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse... but enough about Kanye West.”

Maybe I'm just a miserable *******, who knows..

 

[desprateseagull]

Just don't mention ze war.,.

 

[Norman Potting]

Not as good as the Milton Jones one tweeted yesterday:-

"Just sent someone to see the film Minions for me"

Still not as good as his "Militant feminists - I take my hat off to them. It really annoys them"

 

[worthingseagull]

Scottish kid asks his dad for 50p

Dad says 40p son, what do you want 30p for?

That should have won

 

[jimbob5]

This years 'Joke of the festival' is:-


I've just deleted all the German names from my phone...






...it's now Hans free.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. HANS FREE! Hans is a German name. German names were deleted. hans sounds a bit like hands and you get hands free phones!
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
I'm only laughing cos I'm in Edinburgh and want to be popular …………………………………………. though it's not all that funny really is it.

 

[jimbob5]

People are fighting over who said it first.

It wasn't me! Yes it was! No it's your joke!

 

[Thunder Bolt]

What's the difference between a 'hippo' and a 'Zippo'? One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter

 

[Postman Pat]

Wouldn't happen in Germany.....Cos then there wouldn't be anyone in the contact list so it would be a bit pointless.

 

[jackanada]

What's the difference between a 'hippo' and a 'Zippo'? One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter

But Zippos are bit little lighters. They are far bigger than Clippers or Bics or any if the old styles of British petrol fueled lighters

 

[jimbob5]

Hans Christian Anderson was Danish. I expect he thought the joke was a bit Grimm.