[Humour] Joke de Jour

[AmexRuislip]

Santa was a bit tardy with his rounds overnight and Northumbria police finally managed to catch up with him at the village of Pity Me. He was apprehended as requested by a European arrest warrant on a variety of charges.. He is a serial offender as far as data legislation goes, keeping long lists of data about every ‘customer’, without their permission, is currently against EU law. He drinks and drives, he has no lights in his vehicle, he exceeds the speed limit and he takes livestock across national borders. He is so fat that he damages chimneys so is guilty of breaking and entering. He breaks flying regulations, entering no fly zones and reckless low altitude flight. He was nicked before he could visit my house so I hope they lock obese **** up and throw the keys away.

PS, I nearly forgot, Happy Christmas everyone.

 

[Joey Jo Jo Jr. Shabadoo]

Durham Constabulary have responsibility for policing the village of Pity Me so the Northumbrian force have over stepped their mark here. I’m sure Santa’s legal team will have him released without charge forthwith.

 

[Bodian]

He's also been taking his reindeer between the various Tiers - expressly prohibited at the moment. However, he's pleaded the case that the restrictions don't apply to his reindeer as they have herd immunity.

 

[Bombadier Botty]

Tldr. Do people not realise this is the Internet age and that attention spans have been reduced to zero by the instant gratification the brain has become used to?

Squeeze the gag into 5 words or less or don’t bother.

 

[Jack Straw]

I thought this was a joke, but I've just searched Google maps for the village of Pity Me, and ***k me, it exists!

 

[drew]

Tldr. Do people not realise this is the Internet age and that attention spans have been reduced to zero by the instant gratification the brain has become used to?

Squeeze the gag into 5 words or less or don’t bother.

Brevity is key, your post is too long.

 

[South Stand Bonfire]

As there hasn’t been a joke du jour today, I’ll think I’ll just go and prepare some Cheeses of Nazareth to have with my coffee and biscuits tonight.