Got something to say or just want fewer pesky ads? Join us... 😊

In addition to the "Quotes" thread...



Wilts

New member
Jul 5, 2003
1,772
Bournemouth/Reading
Crazy But True Headlines: (taken from Scouser.com) All appeared in UK or US newspapers.



Include Your Children when Baking Cookies

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted

Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case

Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents

Iraqi Head Seeks Arms

Prostitutes Appeal to Pope

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands

Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms

Eye Drops Off Shelf

Teachers Strike Idle Kids

Clinton Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead

Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Axe

Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told

Miners Refuse to Work after Death

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

Stolen Painting Found by Tree

Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years in Checkout Counter

Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years

Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One

War Dims Hope for Peace

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

Deer Kill 17,000

Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy

Arson Suspect Held in Massachusetts Fire

Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

New Vaccine May Contain Rabies

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
 




Marc

New member
Jul 6, 2003
25,267
hehe some classic ones there :lolol:
 




Deano's Right Foot

Well-known member
Jul 5, 2003
3,915
Barcombe
In the Crawley Observer many years ago:

"Youth Kicked In Bollards"

and from the same publication I also enjoyed the line printed twice reporting a flasher: "...was wearing a black jumper and had short black curly hair and had short black curly hair,"
 








Wilts

New member
Jul 5, 2003
1,772
Bournemouth/Reading
Dunkstar said:
By the way u havent got the mammoth book of jokes have u? because these are all in there!

If you go to Scouser.com and go to "Ava Laff", they're all in there, along with all the football quotes etc...

Usually brightens up any dull day for me.
 


Albion and Premier League latest from Sky Sports


Top
Link Here