If I tell you a joke....

[Nibble]

A guy goes to the doctor

"Doctor, everytime I look in the mirror I get a boner"

Doctor:

"That's 'cos you look like a c unt"

 

[Lewes' best seagull]

4.5/10

 

[JonathanLivingstonSeagull]

this board is obsessed with .5

personally i think .5 should be banned

the people who award .5 in player rates are wrong. this is because they are marking according to their perception of what 5,6,7 etc mean from the national dailies, sunday papers, the argus and champ, rather than their own original constructs.

they are failing to say to themselves - 'i am not sure what to rate coxy, his effort demanded a 7, but his skill only a 6 on this days occasion... and yet these are not options in the one to ten rate system... how frustrating.'

Further, they aren't saying to themselves: 'therefore i must re-evaluate the terms of which i mark one to ten, in order to create a new system by which i can relate my perceptions of performance within the crucible the one to ten system grants, and not by adding .5 to the crucible within which these ideas are communicated.

.5 is not an option! it should be destroyed! it is wrong and worse than both aids and hitler and paedos!

except here where it is largely irrelevant of course

i rate the joke six and two-thirds

 

[logan89]

this board is obsessed with .5

personally i think .5 should be banned

the people who award .5 in player rates are wrong. this is because they are marking according to their perception of what 5,6,7 etc mean from the national dailies, sunday papers, the argus and champ, rather than their own original constructs.

they are failing to say to themselves - 'i am not sure what to rate coxy, his effort demanded a 7, but his skill only a 6 on this days occasion... and yet these are not options in the one to ten rate system... how frustrating.'

Further, they aren't saying to themselves: 'therefore i must re-evaluate the terms of which i mark one to ten, in order to create a new system by which i can relate my perceptions of performance within the crucible the one to ten system grants, and not by adding .5 to the crucible within which these ideas are communicated.

.5 is not an option! it should be destroyed! it is wrong and worse than both aids and hitler and paedos!

except here where it is largely irrelevant of course

i rate the joke six and two-thirds

Good point well made.

i'll give you a 7.5/10.

Too good for a 7but not quite good enough for an 8.

 

[Spun Cuppa]

Sir Paul McCartney bought Heather Mills a plane for Christmas...

And a Ladyshave for the other leg

 

[Frutos]

3 and 37/43 out of 10.

 

[Lewes' best seagull]

I'm so sorry I will re-evaluate my mark.

4 and 40000/80000

 

[H block]

I would rate that joke as deserving of only 45% of the available marks.

 

[Robot Chicken]

I'll give it 56%

 

[Soul Finger]

Sir Paul McCartney bought Heather Mills a plane for Christmas...

And a Ladyshave for the other leg

Sir Paul McCartney was being interviewed about his marriage to Heather Mills.

Interviewer: "So, Sir Paul, do you think you'll ever go down on one knee again?"

Sir Paul: "I would prefer it if you called her Heather."

 

[Spun Cuppa]

A mate of mine is of mixed parentage

Half Scots, a quarter Welsh and the other third Irish