London Pompous
Active member
- Feb 16, 2008
- 660
Albion players held a team press conference Monday to express their shock, confusion, and disgust at discovering midfield midget Dean Cox masturbating vigorously in the darkness of the team's tape room while viewing recordings of his recent stellar performance against Yeovil.
"We were walking down the hallway like usual and heard a bunch of moaning and shouting coming the tape room, so we opened up the door and there was Coxy with his warm-ups around his ankles, churning himself with both hands," said striker Glenn Murray.
"He just kept grunting 'Put it inside the full back. Again. Give it the soft touch. Oh, Dean, you're so good. Don't tell me you're going to shoot again. I'm not ready for that yet."
Suspended utility player Adam Virgo said he was happy he had to sit out the third of his five match ban, claiming that there was no chance Cox would have cracked one out watching a tape of him.
"We were walking down the hallway like usual and heard a bunch of moaning and shouting coming the tape room, so we opened up the door and there was Coxy with his warm-ups around his ankles, churning himself with both hands," said striker Glenn Murray.
"He just kept grunting 'Put it inside the full back. Again. Give it the soft touch. Oh, Dean, you're so good. Don't tell me you're going to shoot again. I'm not ready for that yet."
Suspended utility player Adam Virgo said he was happy he had to sit out the third of his five match ban, claiming that there was no chance Cox would have cracked one out watching a tape of him.
How random.
