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Haha no Pompey or Palace though!

Have you considered marrying a rich Brightonian in a part of town you like? My Dad moved to Worthing a few years ago and loves it. It's much cheaper than Brighton.

My Dad did 2 sets of his numbers twice a week and his uncles as well. My wife told him to stop buying 8 tickets a week and allowed him 1 set twice a week. The first day of the national lottery myself and 4 mates all picked a set each without buying a single ticket. We had picked one correct...

Whilst the world has gone to hell in hand basket, the gap between rich and poor is at its widest in recorded history (strangely at its narrowest during my 1970s childhood), I love the fact the Albion are amazing and I can fill every moment of my spare time with Albion related shit on the...

I am absolutely outraged. Sorry, who is he and what did he say?

England 2 up, then Ferguson injury time hat trick to boost his confidence.

Funny enough, was having breakfast with my Mum in Seafords own fecking weird WW2 cafe. She said 'It's funny but I can't think of a single person in our family that died in the Second World War!' So I said 'What about your Mum's entire family in Poland that was wiped out in the Holocaust?' 'Oh...

No shit Sherlock, the slowest player in the Premier League is now the slowest player in the Bundesliga.

An opposite situation is my mate Dave. He's politically obsessed but knows nothing of football. He decided about 20 odd years ago that when people talk football at him and ask who he supports he says 'I'm a life long Man United fan!' Then relies on the two or three Man Utd snippets he's heard...

Obviously if he's left wing, agree and ask him to expand his argument. If he's right wing, tell him he's wrong and you don't want to hear another word from his stupid mouth. (Unless you are of the right wing persuasion then reverse the above.)

As usual I'll be in the home end with a mate.

Only like rabbits and people. Happy to eat the others.

I love the child's voice crying 'Just boot it' over and over. I assume it's a Chelsea fan.

Never was on. Just NSC

Waited an hour and 15 minutes for a bus that's supposed to be every 15 minutes.

The Northern line and experiencing severe delays. Farage and Racism

Whilst it's obviously transport, I'm gonna go for - actually beating teams we dominate.

It was their first home defeat in over a year. There was a conveyor belt of police into their end and out again covered in blood. They chucked concrete at the train and bricks at the coaches. I certainly don't miss playing Millwall away (except in playoff semi finals).

Born in South London, moved to Shoreham when I was 4. All my mates would desert me for the Albion on a Saturday afternoon and although I wasn't interested in football I joined them for Barnsley at home the start of '85/86 and never looked back. Even went to Millwall away a week later.

In Northern Cyprus duty free. My daughter asked when Shit, Blood and Vomit would be available.