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Quite possibly the sweatiest man in comedy.

Carol Kirkwood. Other than Whisky, the only good thing to come out of Scotland.

Spends a good deal of the game sitting on his @rse as well. Stupid American pastimes!

Good on her.

The effigy wasn't fat enough to represent Salmond anyway!

A theramin or recorder, especially played at length by a small child to the point of dribble coming out the bottom end ... errggh I love the sounds of bagpipes in massed pipes and drums.

You acted in the best interests of the dogs health, therefore the neutering "contract" is surely nullified. Also, why was this a stipulation in the first place. The only reason to keep entire would be to breed or show. Neither of which you sound like you wanted to do, and would have had no...

I hope the bearded **** took a 250lb Smart bomb full in the chest and they never found anything of him. That'll learn him!

2 x South Africa v Japan at Amex. Day after my Dads birthday, so thats his prezzie sorted. Also got 1 ticket for Italy v Canada at Elland Road Drew a blank on the England Games I applied for.

replace the Bovril with Marmite, and you are bang on!!!

Maggie Thatcher and Edwina Currie. 13th October, ie. today, Happy Birthday to me etc etc

Stamp Duty!

Very best wishes to Lord B for speedy recovery.

Our whole shoot did it (half on Saturday, half the week before), under the farmers tractor bucket full of stupidly cold water. Never ending torrent! All a good laugh and over £500 went to Yorkshire Air Ambulance.

Pathetic pr**k. How about I introduce to my dogs when they are "hot" on the hunt, and watch you soil yourself!

I reckon they will get it. The idiots amongst them will get carried away in a nationalist fervor whipped up by the Fat Jock. They'll be happy for a while before the penny drops! If they get it and don't get into Europe, will all the jockos down here be illegal? Ditto if they get into Europe and...

Shooting Times (weekly) Sporting Gun (monthly) The Field (monthly) Autosport (weekly) F1 Magazine (monthly)

Superheroes by the Script!!! Seems to be playing a lot in Radio 2

The first person I see when I step outside my office door is a f***ing Nigel!! (overall, he's actually ok, but even so!)

Bit chubby really