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Is this your sword. No, I've lost a jacket. I'm imagining you like this; Am I right?

We're not all in your league Colonel.

Le coiffeur pour hommes OUT.

I've been giving this a lot of thought over the last 3 minutes and I think the problem is obvious. The club has reached such massive proportions that gravity is having an unequal effect on the club, pinning them to the bottom of the table. It seems they are rewriting the laws of physics. Perhaps...

For 1 game I think a quick mince down the pub is in order surely.

I'm sure he's very good at his job and a nice guy and all that. But his reverential arselicking delivery to camera makes me want to put my foot through the telly.

Blimey HT. You remind me of this guy;

This would play havoc with my pre-game beer consumption. Its a big no from me.

I watch a lot of rugby and the difference to football is night and day. in rugby the referee remains in charge. He's advised by the video ref but his decision is final and he will often disagree with the video ref. Replays are freely played on the big screen in the stadium for everyone to see...

Lola?

This young lad is being treated like a piranha. Everybody out!

They look a bit "crystal palace" to me. In more ways than one.

Not sure about that DD. Looks like a work to rule to me. Should be booked for time-wasting.

Good name for a company selling trainers for £400.

The more I think about it, it seems to be associated with spankings (in a football sense:)). The last ear worm I had was that high pitched wooo ..eeverton after last seasons debacle. That took days to go. Maybe a syringe and sulphuric acid might help.

I was at the game yesterday and I've been earnestly attempting to expunge the memory from my conscious brain BUT I have been singing that hi ho silver lining song villa play as they come out in my bloody head all last night and this morning. I even woke up in the middle of the night with it...

However you dress it up its a great signing.

Its no surprise Rumbelows wanted out.