It was nothing serious, some of their pups wanted to see who was top dog on the south coast. Few calls were made during the week, nods and winks between top boys. Our kid formed a skeleton crew, but respect to them, they asked some of us old lags to come out of retirement to show them the ropes...
1. Knees up
2. Punch up
3. Piss up
4. Winding up the Old Bill
5. In depth social anthropological analysis of young working class men in a tribal environment, and an analysis of their behaviour both to and from other groups of such men from different geographical tribes.
We'll have to put together a decent firm to greet some of the new teams to Falmer if we get promoted. Can't have some cheeky northerners or fat cockneys coming down to our manor for the weekend and taking it over. When we get into the Champions league then those of us in retirement might dust...
No sonny, the RPF is the Rottingdean Patriotic Front, and the PCC the Patcham Crazy Crew, but if you are looking for an application form, there ain't one, it's on personal recommendation only, and then you have to sit before a panel and be quizzed for two minutes on your two specialist subjects...
We know who you are, we knew that you wouldn't come up to standard that's all, don't take it personally, it's just like the Marines. The RPF are very selective about who they let in, and the PCC are even fussier.
I had to prove that I had two Chuck Norris DVD box sets before they would even...
Don't worry son, even if it kicks off in the pub and a few windows are rearranged you and your Guardian reading chums won't have to worry about getting shards of glass in your tofu. We'll put some cling film over your plate beforehand, if that's okay by you.
As I have said before, we're not...
You can mock us mate, but we're like the Canadian Mounties, if someone comes on OUR turf, taking over OUR pubs, and calling OUR fans names, then someone has to take a stand, and we always get our man, even if special weapons and tactics are required.
Look sonny, no disrespect, but Ray Winstone would not last five minutes with Scratchcard, and Big Vern would make mincemeat of him, bones and all.
One day when someone is giving it large to you, you'll be grateful to have the likes of me and Uncle Albert around to have a quiet word in their...
No son, this is about an Englishman's right to defend his castle. Most of us generals are in semi retirement, too many banning orders and grief from her indoors if we get put inside again after a bit of bifters with the enemy. We don't go out to hurt the innocent, though there is always a bit of...
That's fair comment mate. Nothing wrong with a bit of firm on firm. If they want to come to our territory then we are entitled to defend it. No scarvers, no little old ladies, no OB, just top boys giving and taking it fair, man to man. We know who runs and who turns up with naughty tools though...
I was tolled that Dick Knight (LIAR!) was going to shave of his beard but kept it on to DELIBIRITELY humilliate Dean Wilkins cos he didn't have much hair. how bad can a man get? NEVER trust a beardie, and they tickle my flange to too make things worse