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Very disappointing and half-arsed display, wickets literally being gifted to Pakistan, it’s like they couldn’t be bothered to give it a proper go.

I know people absolutely raved about this shot as the greatest Olympic shot ever etc, but to me it’s ever so slightly flawed by the cloud shape near his feet. It makes it look like he’s standing on a platform - of course he isn’t, but I just think the shot would have been truly great if that...

Alexa, show me Wolves in Rome…

Yup. Trump could sexually abuse a whole row of women, and the MAGA cultists wouldn't care less. But if he was to say something truly outrageous like, "Maybe it's not the best idea to give depressed, angry teenagers unlimited access to semi-automatic guns", well – that'd be a whole different...

No, that was: "Hey, guys, don’t be so WOKE. Just let the Germans have half of Poland. They'll definitely stop there, and HOUSE PRICES WILL RISE.”

I know someone taking Ozempic for diabetes (seems to be helping), and someone for weight loss (gave an initial loss, but didn’t make much difference long-term). Personally I’d only go for these drugs as an absolute last resort. ‘Cheating’ or masking the body’s systems with pharmaceuticals is...

I’m confused. Are you saying Dewsbury Hall isn’t a mansion in Surrrey, but is actually a footballer?

“Ah, hasn’t one met before? You must be that two-faced Australian chap one met on a previous royal tour? Tried to ruin cricket in the 1970s?” “Nah mate. This here’s an alpaca. Not Kerry Packer.”

As a Seattle fan, I raise you Jadeveon Clowney, for whom we traded about 10 years worth of 1st round picks. He was good for one season, then injured for the next two, Then gone.

Well, duh. Take it from me - nothing, and I mean nothing, happens in KSA without MBS approving it. This is the most unsurprising ‘revelation’ ever.

At 01:21… Craig Maskell wraps his arm around the Doncaster goalkeeper and pulls him firmly to the ground. Storer slams it in. Brighton survive. What would today’s standards make of that?

Tough game for Evan today, he’s probably “a finisher” more than he is an all-round player, and there was precious few finishing opportunities today. But yes, feel a goal would do him the world of good, confidence-wise.

Sorry, you’ve lost me there. He has plans? Like, actual policies?

For me, the issue is that two years have now passed since he was dumped by Boehly. You could argue he wanted a break, you could argue he’s waiting for ‘the perfect job’, but the longer he stays out of management, the more clubs are going to question his appetite and desire, his motives and...

Bollocks. I’ve watched 6 of the 8 races so far, and the two I missed were the two GB won. So I’ve seen nothing but the Kiwis comfortably leading from start to finish every time. Boo.