[Albion] Who is the best exponent of the ‘dark arts’ at the Albion?

Bozza

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Jul 4, 2003

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #1

Shamelessly stealing this from The Athletic where Andy Naylor nominated Alexis Mac Allister.

Maybe he is, but I need to be convinced as Andy's reasoning doesn't really do it for me as it focuses on Mac Allister's propensity for picking up yellow cards despite being a smiley happy chappy.

For me, a master of the dark arts of football gets away with stuff more often than not, and doesn't just go around fouling and picking up yellows.

So, tell me - who is your Albion master of the dark arts?

 

Bozza

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• #2

In fact, I'm going to reply to myself and nominate Joel Veltman.

Convince me otherwise.

 

aolstudios

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Nov 30, 2011

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brighton

• Feb 25, 2023

• #3

It's obviously Veltman. Bloody good at it too. A picture of innocence & barely gets carded, while dominating his oppo mentally & physically for fun. Looking forward to a repeat of last season's bullying of several Hammers on Saturday

 

Weststander

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Aug 25, 2011

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Withdean area

• Feb 25, 2023

• #4

The Dutch Master Joel Veltman.

Winds up opposition players, despite on paper, their superior pace. Expertly obstructing, yet winning free-kicks. Not averse to subtly leaving his foot in. A constant nuisance when we’re defending set pieces.

 

seagullwedgee

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #5

Veltman. By several country miles.

 

Stato

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Dec 21, 2011

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #6

I read the thread title - I thought of Joel. He's such an experienced defender, he seems to know every trick in the book. £900,000? How the hell did nobody else snap him up? There isn't a defence in the division in which he wouldn't be useful.

 

Sarisbury Seagull

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #7

VELTMAN!

No one else comes close! Ridiculous Naylor has gone for someone else!

 

Algernon

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Sep 9, 2012

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Newmarket.

• Feb 25, 2023

• #8

Veltman i.e The grey man.

 

jcdenton08

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #9

It’s Veltman

 

B

Bodian

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #10

Not sure why you even asked! We all know who it is.

 

Weststander

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #11

When the Seagull gets stuck in the chimney ….

 

Sarisbury Seagull

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #12

Can someone on Twitter or something message Naylor and let him know about this huge error. Veltman is always under rated and it’s about time he got some public credit for something!

 

Bozza

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• #13

Quickly scanning through the article, Ben White gets the nomination at Arsenal which surprises me slightly, whilst Neal Maupay getting the nod at Everton is less of a shock.

 

B-right-on

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Apr 23, 2015

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #14

Another Veltz vote here.

Truly mastered the chopping down and innocent hands up 'not done anything' move afterwards.

 

Zeberdi

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Oct 20, 2022

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #15

Yeah, another vote for Veltman. Other than that we seem distinctly lacking in the ‘dark arts’.

I thought Mitoma might have had the mentality to go there a few times - when he sat on his butt waving an imaginary red card after the rugby tackle from Semedo and on occasion it‘s looked to me like he‘s gone down too easily for a pen rather than putting in a cross or working through a tackle but in retrospect that’s been more frustration than devious play - unfortunately he doesn’t have Veltman’s mastery of shithousery nor the ability to make it all look so innocent.

No one does.

 

Comrade Sam

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• Feb 25, 2023

• #16

Saw the heading and my first thought was Veltman.

 

Swansman

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• Feb 26, 2023

• #17

Veltman.

Welbeck and Caicedo are up there as well.

 

Dun Lurkin

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Feb 20, 2023

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• Feb 26, 2023

• #18

Another vote for Veltman, although I think Gross isn't averse to a little dig.

 

LamieRobertson

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Feb 3, 2008

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SHOREHAM BY SEA

• Feb 26, 2023

• #19

Sanchez

 

HastingsSeagull

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Jan 13, 2010

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BGC Manila

• Feb 26, 2023

• #20

Thought Veltman instantly then was quite surprised so many agreed. Thought I would have to argue the case more.

And A.N. picking our ‘most well known by big 6/7 fans’ player isn’t too much of a surprise. Which end will he be sat in at Stoke I wonder (yes I’m aware is a press section).