Unpleasant old man in the park, yesterday.

[Stat Brother]

I wandered down to our local park, with the kids and dogs.
As I walked in, there stood an old (70+) scroutty, grimy, unpleasant man, looking across at a couple of lads playing football, and further on to the quiet play park.

Me and mine went past quickly, the kids were cycling and obviously excited to 'cut loose', spending 20 mins or so going round the park.
As we were leaving, it didn't occur to me he'd still be there.
Imagine my shock to see my boy, stopping, as he should, at the park entrance, talking to this man.
My daughter was next with me a few yards behind.

I shooed the kids along, as the man repeated said, 'oh they are lovely at that age'. He must have said it 5 times.

My skin was literally crawling, a nasty nasty experience.

 

[tonymgc]

Was it this guy by any chance?

In all seriousness it would freak the shit out of me too if it were my nephews

 

[moggy]

Why on earth have you thought the worst about this guy?
Just because he may have been dressed shoddily don't make him a perv.
That's the problem with this society!
ALWAYS SO BLOODY QUICK TO PRE-JUDGE !!!!

 

[Poyetry In Motion]

Can we please stop with the Adkins bashing

 

[CheeseRolls]

You were right to be concerned...

I always knew it would end this way for Greg Stanley

 

[FalmerforAll!**]

This wasn't in Burgess Hill by any chance was it?

 

[Aldo]

Can we please stop with the Adkins bashing

!

 

[ds4000]

I thought he had done something wrong then!

 

[redneb]

Why on earth have you thought the worst about this guy?
Just because he may have been dressed shoddily don't make him a perv.
That's the problem with this society!
ALWAYS SO BLOODY QUICK TO PRE-JUDGE !!!!

I partially agree. Cos of the awareness of the many perverts there are, it's made people think anyone with a strange disposition could be dangerous.

The guy was probably just a lonely old man who just doesnt understand what society expects you not to do nowadays. He probably strolled home pretty upset that obviously someone looked at him in that light.

That said, only Stat brother has a feel for what the man in question was actually like. Sometimes you can feel nervous by the way someone is looking at someone you care about. Maybe you had to be there to understand.

 

[Goldstone Rapper]

I suggest you read Tim Gill's excellent 'No Fear' book
Available as a PDF here http://www.gulbenkian.org.uk/pdffiles/--item-1266-223-No-fear-19-12-07.pdf

 

[cjd]

I wandered down to our local park, with the kids and dogs.
As I walked in, there stood an old (70+) scroutty, grimy, unpleasant man, looking across at a couple of lads playing football, and further on to the quiet play park.

Me and mine went past quickly, the kids were cycling and obviously excited to 'cut loose', spending 20 mins or so going round the park.
As we were leaving, it didn't occur to me he'd still be there.
Imagine my shock to see my boy, stopping, as he should, at the park entrance, talking to this man.
My daughter was next with me a few yards behind.

I shooed the kids along, as the man repeated said, 'oh they are lovely at that age'. He must have said it 5 times.

My skin was literally crawling, a nasty nasty experience.

Either you have failed to give more relevant information about this 'unpleasant' man, or your judgement of him, just because he is 'old, grimy etc etc is fuelled by the paranoia induced state we live in today.

The guy is old....maybe lives on his own......and just likes to see kids who are happy enjoying fresh air in 'old time' pusuits, like a park playground.

No hope for your children being understanding and compassionate adults with a dad like you.

 

[tedebear]

Whilst it is healthy to have an element of caution when it comes to protecting our children, you also need to weigh this up with the reality of the person you have just pigeon-holed as something they might not be.

The man may just simply be lonely. There is a heck of a lot of people who are. Thats not a crime.

 

[Uwinsc]

Sometimes you do just get a feeling about someone, I had it once when i was working in a shop. However I know that people would probably have said the same thing about my grandad a few years ago- now he has a carer with him- he was a teacher and loves stopping to talk to young children, he was struggling to look after himself then and would have looked a bit rough and he tends to repeat himself. So Im guessing sometimes it's not what it looks.

 

[Stat Brother]

Why on earth have you thought the worst about this guy?
Just because he may have been dressed shoddily don't make him a perv.
That's the problem with this society!
ALWAYS SO BLOODY QUICK TO PRE-JUDGE !!!!

Either you have failed to give more relevant information about this 'unpleasant' man, or your judgement of him, just because he is 'old, grimy etc etc is fuelled by the paranoia induced state we live in today.

The guy is old....maybe lives on his own......and just likes to see kids who are happy enjoying fresh air in 'old time' pusuits, like a park playground.

No hope for your children being understanding and compassionate adults with a dad like you.

Whilst it is healthy to have an element of caution when it comes to protecting our children, you also need to weigh this up with the reality of the person you have just pigeon-holed as something they might not be.

The man may just simply be lonely. There is a heck of a lot of people who are. Thats not a crime.

I partially agree. Cos of the awareness of the many perverts there are, it's made people think anyone with a strange disposition could be dangerous.

The guy was probably just a lonely old man who just doesnt understand what society expects you not to do nowadays. He probably strolled home pretty upset that obviously someone looked at him in that light.

That said, only Stat brother has a feel for what the man in question was actually like. Sometimes you can feel nervous by the way someone is looking at someone you care about. Maybe you had to be there to understand.

I totally agree with all of you, (except for the one obvious comment) and I definitely would be saying the same, but not in defence of this one!.

It's hard to explain, he was gawping like a 14 year old on a nudist beach.
The fact that he was still routed to the spot some 20 mins later didn't help.

 

[Stat Brother]

No hope for your children being understanding and compassionate adults with a dad like you.

That's such a twatty thing to say.
You have no knowledge of me or my kids, but you have decided on the strength of my unease in one situation that I have no compassion/empathy that I can pass on.
And yet I'm the one that fookin blinkered.

 

[tedebear]

Fair enough (responding to your previous post not the one to CJD), certainly sounds odd, and I'm sure any parent would have thought exactly as you did. But then again at 70+ there is a fair chance that there is something wrong (senile dementia for example). Who knows he may have even wandered off out of a home of somesort. We do still need to still ensure our kids respect their elders and not brand them all as gibbering, gawping old fools. But obviously there are execptions we need to alert them to as well.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

No hope for your children being understanding and compassionate adults with a dad like you.

You are judging his whole parenting performance and attitude on the first post?

Did your children see you laying into Ken Brown? You boasted about how angry and sweary you got. The chap made mistakes that night, but a good example to set..?

 

[Thunder Bolt]

People tend to over exaggerate the 'stranger danger' when most abused kids are abused by family members. The press also tends to highlight any abuse of children so therefore the danger is blown out of proportion. Kids are in no more danger now than they were 50 years ago when it was the norm to be playing out in the street.

 

[Stat Brother]

'Routed to the spot' probably gives the wrong impression.
I missed what him and my son were saying, in fairness I don't care how good a groomer he may or may not have been, he still wouldn't have got a word in edgeways!
But his whole demeanor around my daughter was so wrong, I would never feel guilty about scurrying away, even if it turned out he was ... (I want to say... A Priest, but that isn't going to help!) still you know what I mean.

 

[cjd]

You are judging his whole parenting performance and attitude on the first post?

Did your children see you laying into Ken Brown? You boasted about how angry and sweary you got. The chap made mistakes that night, but a good example to set..?

I don't recall boasting about it all. Neither do I recall swearing at him. Neither were my young children with me.