SHould I give him some LETTUCE ?

[Easy 10]

Bruce is after something. He's not actually HUNGRY, because he has both seed AND millet in his cage. No, he'd invading my favourite armchair because he has one thing on his birdy brain right now, and thats a nice big juicy LETTUCE LEAF thats been run under the tap. Now normally I'd feed it to him without a second thought. However, Bruce has MACKED me off recently in a couple of ways.

1. He LUNGED at me last night when I was changing his water, and when I chastised him, he skulked back to his perch and HISSED at me.

2. He started screeching at seagulls at about 7am this morning. Not normally a problem, but I'm currently enjoying a few days off work, and the LAST thing I want to hear in the morning is this gobby bastard giving it LARGE first thing in the morning from the safety of his cage to a bird that could comfortably swallow him whole.

Therefore, I place Bruce's lettuce fate in the hands of the NSC bretheren. Do I (once again) give in to his INCESSANT demands and give him the damn lettuce. Or do I refuse, and teach the squawky little tosser a LESSON ?

 

[B.M.F]

He should be punished and learn to respect his master.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

Bruce needs to be put in his place. He must realise that he is an inferior species to us. The lettuce leaf will have to wait until he has learned some manners and accepts that you are his master. If he does not play ball then you must tell him about birds that are being eaten by Pelicans, in St James Park and how the Brighton to London link is only 48 minutes on the fast train.

 

[Uncle C]

Wring its f***ing neck - vermin

 

[REDLAND]

Let him go free, keeping animals in cages for self gratification is wrong !!

 

[Marshy]

Your sofa disturbs me greatly Easy........

 

[Guinness Boy]

Not only would I hold back the cheaky beggers lettuce - I'd take it out of the fridge, add some tomatoes and dressing and eat a nice SALAD in front of him. That'll learn him for macking you off.

 

[Commander]

Let him go free, keeping animals in cages for self gratification is wrong !!

Yeah, and I'm sure he'll survive for a long time, won't he?

 

[Easy 10]

Let him go free, keeping animals in cages for self gratification is wrong !!

He's not in a feckin cage, he's on my ARMCHAIR (as usual).
And thats ANOTHER thing. He shat all down the back of it the other day. Nope, I'm afraid its all stacking up for millet-boy....

 

[Easy 10]

Your sofa disturbs me greatly Easy........

That was the missus's choice. And comfy though it is, her choice in men is clearly just as poor.

 

[Easy 10]

Not only would I hold back the cheaky beggers lettuce - I'd take it out of the fridge, add some tomatoes and dressing and eat a nice SALAD in front of him. That'll learn him for macking you off.

That is an EXCELLENT shout, G B.
I am a notorious salad-dodger, but in this case, I think I'll make an exception.

 

[REDLAND]

Yeah, and I'm sure he'll survive for a long time, won't he?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/education/3869815.stm

 

[Guinness Boy]

He shat on your armchair? Right forget my last post, take his lettuce and add chicken, bacon, parmesan and croutons and eat a full CEASAR in front of him. While drooling and smacking your lips.

A man's armchair is SACRED

 

[Commander]

He's not in a feckin cage, he's on my ARMCHAIR (as usual).
And thats ANOTHER thing. He shat all down the back of it the other day. Nope, I'm afraid its all stacking up for millet-boy....

Punish him, Easy. Clip his wings or something.

 

[rospants]

Perhaps hes playing up because he secretly hates lettuce, and knows that if hes naughty he wont get any. I think you should force feed him the lettuce, that'll teach him

 

[Marshy]

That was the missus's choice. And comfy though it is, her choice in men is clearly just as poor.

its got to be late eighties early nighties....
i was expecting 3 geese flying up the wall as well to be honest.

 

[Commander]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/education/3869815.stm

Yes, I know there are parrots living in England. Colonies of parrots. One domesticated bird left to go free by itself just as we are approaching winter is not going to stand much chance though, is he?

 

[Easy 10]

its got to be late eighties early nighties....
i was expecting 3 geese flying up the wall as well to be honest.

"Oh your sofa is soooo 90's"
- Marshy, yesterday.

 

[Silent Bob]

I bet you couldn't crush his skull in one hand.