Phrases used instead of swearing

[The Great Cornholio]

Following on from a question in Ant and Decs Family Fortunes thingy, what quirky phrases do you use instead of swearing or just in general.

A couple for me - firstly, Scaly Backed Bograt. A phrase coined by the late landlord of the Rodmill pub in Eastbourne and one I still use today when not wanting to call someone a .

Usage - You Scaly Backed Bograt!!

Secondly, not a swear replacement but when I am feeling particularly pleased with myself, I have been known to utter "I am WEASEL!" From the Weasel/Baboon cartoons.

So, NSC SPACKER etc aside, what strange sayings do you use?

 

[The Great Cornholio]

BTW - I can't believe the drivel conversations I'm starting/joining in with on here today. I'm off sick feeling very sorry for myself and bored stupid.

 

[Muhammed - I’m hard - Bruce Lee]

one of del boys.....chateaux neuf de pap

 

[johnny jigsaw]

"Shi'ite Muslim Militia"

 

[enigma]

Bo Selecta!

 

[brighton2win]

mmm.. i can only think of 1 i like to swear properly

"What the Foosh?" <--- very occasionally

 

[Yorkie]

Biscuits

 

[33057 Seagull]

Grontophile - (cf Paedophile) but roughly translated is a the love of a person well beyond the age of normal retirement. Usage as a term of abuse for a very slow driver at traffic lights late in pulling away. Driver usually wearing a trilby hat, muffler or similar attire & often seen smoking a pipe accompanied by a female partner whom without doubt is his longstanding wife.

 

[Del Boy]

Fiddle sticks

He-Ho

 

[Norman Baker suck my lozenge]

Oh fffffffffor five minutes

 

[RonnieO'Sullivan]

one of del boys.....chateaux neuf de pap

love it

 

[NMH]

Anagrams of real swear-words.

i.e. opo (poo), trad (drat), dnas (nads!) creas ulbe (sacre bleu)

 

[Kaney]

foook

'sake

kin hell

 

[pasty]

Botheration

 

[perseus]

Crystal Palace supporter. General term of abuse for Londoners.

 

[Monkey Man]

Ruck off you rucking rucker. In tribute to the bloke who spoke to my dad in such terms while trying not to offend the child version of me.

 

[Woodchip]

Do One.

 

[wilbob]

Twastard!

 

[Yorkie]

Botheration

That's another one I use.

 

[Mustela Furo]

Sugar Plums