leonidas
Go tell the Spartans
Oh dear!!!!
This bloke is working on the buses and collecting tickets. He rings the
bell for the driver to set off when there's a woman half getting on the bus.
The driver sets off, the woman falls from the bus and is killed.
At the trial the bloke is sent down for murder and seeing as it's Texas
he's sent to the electric chair.
On the day of his execution he's sat in the chair and the executioner
grants him a final wish.
"Well" says the man, "is that your packed lunch over there?"
"Yes" answers the executioner.
"Can I have that green banana?" the man asks.
The executioner sighs and reluctantly gives up his banana.
When the man's finished, the executioner flips the switch
sending hundreds of thousands of volts through the man. When the smoke
clears the man is still alive. The executioner can't believe it.
"Can I go?" the man asks.
"I suppose so" says the executioner, "that's never happened before."
The man leaves and eventually gets his job back on the buses selling
tickets. Again he rings the bell for the driver to go when people are
still getting on. A man falls under the wheels and is killed. The
bloke is sent to the electric chair again.
The executioner is determined to do it right this time so rigs the chair
up to the electric supply for the whole of Texas. The bloke is again sat
in the chair.
"What is your final wish?" asks the executioner.
"Can I have that green banana in your packed lunch?" says the condemned
man.
The executioner sighs and reluctantly gives up his banana. The bloke
eats the banana all up and the executioner flips the switch.
Millions of volts course through the chair blacking out Texas. When the
smoke clears the man is still there smiling in the chair. The
executioner can't believe it and lets the man go.
Well, would you believe, the bloke gets his job back on the buses.
Once again he rings the bell whilst passengers are still getting on, this
time killing three of them. He is sent to the electric chair again.
The executioner rigs up all the electricity in America to the chair,
determined to get his man this time. The man sits down in the chair
smiling.
"What's your final wish?" asks the executioner.
"Well" says the man, "Can I have that green banana out of your packed
lunch?"
The executioner hands over his banana and the man eats it all, skin
included. The executioner then pulls the handle and a zillion million
trillion volts go through the chair. When the smoke rises the man is
still sat there alive without even a burn mark.
"I give up" says the executioner, "I don't understand. How you can still
be alive after all that?"
He stroked his chin. "It's something to do with that green banana isn't
it?" he asked.
No, said the man, nothing to do with that, you see ------------
Wait for it !!
"I'm just a really bad conductor."
This bloke is working on the buses and collecting tickets. He rings the
bell for the driver to set off when there's a woman half getting on the bus.
The driver sets off, the woman falls from the bus and is killed.
At the trial the bloke is sent down for murder and seeing as it's Texas
he's sent to the electric chair.
On the day of his execution he's sat in the chair and the executioner
grants him a final wish.
"Well" says the man, "is that your packed lunch over there?"
"Yes" answers the executioner.
"Can I have that green banana?" the man asks.
The executioner sighs and reluctantly gives up his banana.
When the man's finished, the executioner flips the switch
sending hundreds of thousands of volts through the man. When the smoke
clears the man is still alive. The executioner can't believe it.
"Can I go?" the man asks.
"I suppose so" says the executioner, "that's never happened before."
The man leaves and eventually gets his job back on the buses selling
tickets. Again he rings the bell for the driver to go when people are
still getting on. A man falls under the wheels and is killed. The
bloke is sent to the electric chair again.
The executioner is determined to do it right this time so rigs the chair
up to the electric supply for the whole of Texas. The bloke is again sat
in the chair.
"What is your final wish?" asks the executioner.
"Can I have that green banana in your packed lunch?" says the condemned
man.
The executioner sighs and reluctantly gives up his banana. The bloke
eats the banana all up and the executioner flips the switch.
Millions of volts course through the chair blacking out Texas. When the
smoke clears the man is still there smiling in the chair. The
executioner can't believe it and lets the man go.
Well, would you believe, the bloke gets his job back on the buses.
Once again he rings the bell whilst passengers are still getting on, this
time killing three of them. He is sent to the electric chair again.
The executioner rigs up all the electricity in America to the chair,
determined to get his man this time. The man sits down in the chair
smiling.
"What's your final wish?" asks the executioner.
"Well" says the man, "Can I have that green banana out of your packed
lunch?"
The executioner hands over his banana and the man eats it all, skin
included. The executioner then pulls the handle and a zillion million
trillion volts go through the chair. When the smoke rises the man is
still sat there alive without even a burn mark.
"I give up" says the executioner, "I don't understand. How you can still
be alive after all that?"
He stroked his chin. "It's something to do with that green banana isn't
it?" he asked.
No, said the man, nothing to do with that, you see ------------
Wait for it !!
"I'm just a really bad conductor."