Garry Nelson's Left Foot
Well-known member
It was alright.
F.C Tokyo Vs. Cerezo Osaka.
F.C Tokyo went into the game sitting in mid-table with a very average 8 wins, 3 draws and 9 defeats from their opening 20 games. They were up against the divisions whipping boys thogh, in Cerezo Osaka. A side rooted to the bottom of the table with a measly 2 wins and 4 draws from their 20 games so far. Tokyo being my local team I obviously went to the stadium with the idea ion mind of supporting them. However, the team colours of red and blue(but not striped...) left me feeling uneasy, even before kick-off. Added to this was the man sitting to my left who, for want of a better word, was a bit of a cockjuggling thundercunt(is there a better word?). I was very unimpressed by the Tokyo fans having several very large red and blue striped flags. It was beginning to feel a bit like a Palace game.
I began secretly siding with the plucky pink and blue clad Osakans. Then the game kicked off. With pretty much the first attack of the game Cerezo whipped a cross into the box, defenders and attackers rose together and the ball flashed into the corner of the net. Osaka had SCORED! My allegience was secured. I was a cerveso OSAKAN forevermore.
For a side with an absolutely appalling record, Osaka were surprisingly good. They created most -actually, ALL- of the chances in the first 15 minutes. That was until the referee decided to enter the fray. If you think officials in England are bad, and that Man utd get preferential treatment at Old Trafford, you've seen nothing until you've witnessed the farce that passes as officiating in Japan. An overhit ball was played into the osaka box, the keeper came out to collect it, a Tokyo player and an Osakan defender were trotting half heartedly after it, acouple of yards apart. The tokyo striker slips over and the ref promptly gives a penalty.
Tokyo equalise with-to be fair- a very nicely taken penalty.
Osaka are rocked but still finish the half the better team.
At half time I tried to enter the Osaka end but was turned back because my ticket was for the tokyo section. I tried the 'classic' 'i'm a foreigner, I don't understand your strange language and rules' trick, but to no avail. So I bought a small osaka flag for 3quid instead and returned to my seat amidst the Tokyo Ultras(or mums, kids and salarymen to be a little more precise.)
In the second half Thundercunt-San to my left was really giving me and my friend some dirty looks. I think in his day job he may be one of the strained voiced, vein bulging nationalists that drive around this country screeching 'death to the foreigners', 'foreigners bring disease', 'foreigners shame the nation' and other catchy slogans to a disinterested audience of two homeless men and a dog on the run from the local chinese restaurant...
I went further down in his estimation when Osaka regained the lead with a free header from a corner. Terrible defending by the boys in red and blue. As I jumped to my feet I accidentaly knocked over my cup and spilt the dregs of my beer onto the person in front. Oooh, the looks Thundercunt Cockjuggling-San gave me then. It went from bad to worse for him and his SHIT team as two wins out of twenty Cerezo went on to dominate the rest of the game. They scored a third which the homer of a ref disallowed for no discernable reason. Undeterred Osaka scored a third goal for the second time, this time with no room for disallowment. To try and give Tokyo a(nother) chance (after already giving them a penalty for nothing and disallowing a perfectly good goal) the ref decided to send an Osaka player off. Nice.
In the FIFTH minute of injury time twelve man Tokyo managed to scramble a goal back. But it was to be to no avail as my new team, the might CEREZO OSAKA held on to record only their third win of the season.
If anyone actually read all of this...why?! But
anyway.
F.C Tokyo Vs. Cerezo Osaka.
F.C Tokyo went into the game sitting in mid-table with a very average 8 wins, 3 draws and 9 defeats from their opening 20 games. They were up against the divisions whipping boys thogh, in Cerezo Osaka. A side rooted to the bottom of the table with a measly 2 wins and 4 draws from their 20 games so far. Tokyo being my local team I obviously went to the stadium with the idea ion mind of supporting them. However, the team colours of red and blue(but not striped...) left me feeling uneasy, even before kick-off. Added to this was the man sitting to my left who, for want of a better word, was a bit of a cockjuggling thundercunt(is there a better word?). I was very unimpressed by the Tokyo fans having several very large red and blue striped flags. It was beginning to feel a bit like a Palace game.
I began secretly siding with the plucky pink and blue clad Osakans. Then the game kicked off. With pretty much the first attack of the game Cerezo whipped a cross into the box, defenders and attackers rose together and the ball flashed into the corner of the net. Osaka had SCORED! My allegience was secured. I was a cerveso OSAKAN forevermore.
For a side with an absolutely appalling record, Osaka were surprisingly good. They created most -actually, ALL- of the chances in the first 15 minutes. That was until the referee decided to enter the fray. If you think officials in England are bad, and that Man utd get preferential treatment at Old Trafford, you've seen nothing until you've witnessed the farce that passes as officiating in Japan. An overhit ball was played into the osaka box, the keeper came out to collect it, a Tokyo player and an Osakan defender were trotting half heartedly after it, acouple of yards apart. The tokyo striker slips over and the ref promptly gives a penalty.
Tokyo equalise with-to be fair- a very nicely taken penalty.Osaka are rocked but still finish the half the better team.
At half time I tried to enter the Osaka end but was turned back because my ticket was for the tokyo section. I tried the 'classic' 'i'm a foreigner, I don't understand your strange language and rules' trick, but to no avail. So I bought a small osaka flag for 3quid instead and returned to my seat amidst the Tokyo Ultras(or mums, kids and salarymen to be a little more precise.)
In the second half Thundercunt-San to my left was really giving me and my friend some dirty looks. I think in his day job he may be one of the strained voiced, vein bulging nationalists that drive around this country screeching 'death to the foreigners', 'foreigners bring disease', 'foreigners shame the nation' and other catchy slogans to a disinterested audience of two homeless men and a dog on the run from the local chinese restaurant...
I went further down in his estimation when Osaka regained the lead with a free header from a corner. Terrible defending by the boys in red and blue. As I jumped to my feet I accidentaly knocked over my cup and spilt the dregs of my beer onto the person in front. Oooh, the looks Thundercunt Cockjuggling-San gave me then. It went from bad to worse for him and his SHIT team as two wins out of twenty Cerezo went on to dominate the rest of the game. They scored a third which the homer of a ref disallowed for no discernable reason. Undeterred Osaka scored a third goal for the second time, this time with no room for disallowment. To try and give Tokyo a(nother) chance (after already giving them a penalty for nothing and disallowing a perfectly good goal) the ref decided to send an Osaka player off. Nice.
In the FIFTH minute of injury time twelve man Tokyo managed to scramble a goal back. But it was to be to no avail as my new team, the might CEREZO OSAKA held on to record only their third win of the season.
If anyone actually read all of this...why?! But
anyway.
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