He scores when he wants...

[Commander]

He scores when he wants,
He scores when he wants,
Insert Strikers name here,
He scores when he wants.

Is this the worst, most mundane, unoriginal football song ever written? I think it is. And everyone is singing it.

Please please please can we not adopt it for anyone. Please.

Thanks.

Commander.

 

[Manx Shearwater]

If Insert Strikers Name Here really did score when he wanted, every game would end 67-0.

So no, he doesn't score when he wants, he scores when a realistic opportunity arises which he is capable of finishing in a positive way.

That doesn't scan though.

 

[Tooting Gull]

It is pretty dull.

And there is currently no one WE can sing it about anyway...

 

[raz_18]

I generally get annoyed when teams sing this! I think its up there with the drum and goal music!

 

[Commander]

It is THE plastic football song. Chelsea have started singing it about Torres. I will be really disappointed if I ever hear this at the Amex.

 

[HawkTheSeagull]

I generally get annoyed when teams sing this! I think its up there with the drum and goal music!

Beaten into 3rd place by those 2. Its basically saying "he barely scores, so hes shit".

 

[Southwick_Seagull]

Every new song using that tune is equally annoying.

 

[Silent Bob]

Every new song using that tune is equally annoying.

No it isn't, every song should be to this tune and I'm glad we are on our way towards that better world.

 

[Easy 10]

Every new song using that tune is equally annoying.

This. Its the only chant we ever seem to hear now.

I will make an exception for Stoke the other day though in the Bolton game:

"We're sending you down"
"We're sending you doooooown"
"We are Stoke City"
We're sending you down"

 

[Silent Bob]

This. Its the only chant we ever seem to hear now.

I will make an exception for Stoke the other day though in the Bolton game:

"We're sending you down"
"We're sending you doooooown"
"We are Stoke City"
We're sending you down"

Exactly, that's why youre going down, no, or even just a simple going down, no.

Everything.

This tune.

 

[TheBlueAndWhiteStrips]

Any song sung to that tune is awful. Every f@cking live game is littered with this tune. Its like playing a early version Fifa where every crowd song is the same for every game. Its just lazy.

 

[bn1&bn3 Albion]

He scores when he can
He scores when he can
Insert name here
He scores when he can

 

[JJB]

We're shit on tv
We're shit on tv
We are Southampton
We're shit on tv


I think we've used this tune far too f***ing much this season, It is ridiculously annoying.

 

[leigull]

We're shit on tv
We're shit on tv
We are Southampton
We're shit on tv


I think we've used this tune far too f***ing much this season, It is ridiculously annoying.

I was just about to write how I thought Southampton were mainly to blame for this! Variations of that stupid tune, and OWTS was about all I heard

 

[Triggaaar]

While I agree that every song boils down to about 4 tunes, I did like it when it was used for 'burnt your own town' at Selhurst.

 

[el_ciddy]

I was starting to miss threads moaning about songs.

 

[pasty]

So next season then...

We all hate this tune
We all hate this tune
It's so f***ing boring
We all hate this tune

 

[LukeOwen]

I hate it as well!

 

[Commander]

This. Its the only chant we ever seem to hear now.

I will make an exception for Stoke the other day though in the Bolton game:

"We're sending you down"
"We're sending you doooooown"
"We are Stoke City"
We're sending you down"

To be fair to Stoke their "We'll play how we want" chant is OK as it actually means something. But any other chant to this tune should be banned.

 

[MattBackHome]

You're practically French
You're practically French
You're so f***ing Southern
You're practically French

Is the version I hate the least. Partly because I quite like it when fans call us French as it makes me feel a bit cosmopolitan.

But it is an utterly abysmal chant.