Don't be too proud to ask for Help

[public school boy]

Suffering from depression myself, my message to anyone who suffers is ASK FOR HELP. You will be surprised how many people are going through the same types of problems as you and are the only people that understand what it is like. I have never used antidepressants myself due to my addictive nature but others claim that they have helped enormously.
Please don't feel that you are all alone with no one else to turn to. There is help if you seek it and it works. Your GP will point you in the right direction.

 

[BadFish]

Good on you for putting it out there. We need to be more open about depression. Give people a chance to help.

 

[Triggaaar]

Indeed, ask for help. And be prepared to ask more than one person more than once.

 

[PaoloRossiJohnson]

Good on you for putting it out there. We need to be more open about depression. Give people a chance to help.

Indeed.
Having been through depression also, I can only echo the previous comments.

Counsellors, my GP and anti-depressants have been excellent.

Far more people than you realise have suffered/are suffering from depression.

 

[narly101]

And don't be too proud to use anti-depressants either - they help immensely.

 

[Goldstone Rapper]

OK, a beginner's question from me.

Does the circumstances of your life have any relation to whether you are likely to experience depression?

I ask because from an outsider's perspective, not only has he achieved so much already, Gary Speed would appear to have had so much going for him in his life.

 

[Mutts Nuts]

OK, a beginner's question from me.

Does the circumstances of your life have any relation to whether you are likely to experience depression?

I ask because from an outsider's perspective, not only has he achieved so much already, Gary Speed would appear to have had so much going for him in his life.

Life is a very short dream between two very long sleeps

 

[Weststander]

It can well be a darkness hanging over him (which he hid from the macho sports world), and came and went with time.
Churchill called it his 'black dog'.
The success and being loved by fans, would not have helped his deepest melancholic views on his bad days. Unfortunately.

Communication to his family & gp, would be the key to beating it.

Can be inherited or conditioning from a depressed parent when growiing up, or from a bad life event.

 

[The Wookiee]

I know somebody who was treated like shit by his employers when suffering from depression, he ultimately lost his job ! Luckily has got himself together and is restarting his life. No thanks to his previous employers !

 

[PaoloRossiJohnson]

OK, a beginner's question from me.

Does the circumstances of your life have any relation to whether you are likely to experience depression?

I ask because from an outsider's perspective, not only has he achieved so much already, Gary Speed would appear to have had so much going for him in his life.

Quick answer: Can do, but not necessarily. Depression is mainly caused by a decrease in production of a chemical called serotonin. The decrease can indeed be down to stressful life events, but as we all surely know by now, you can still have stressful events going on in your life, even if you appear to be successful in life. That's the key word - "appear". I'm stating the obvious, but it's easy to see a broken leg, it's not so easy to spot depression.

Hope that helps.

For more info, I would recommend the NHS and BBC websites - very useful and informative.

 

[Tux the albion Penguin]

I never expected this. Nicely put, I for one have Bipolar. So I understand completely.

 

[Lady Whistledown]

We don't actually know that Gary Speed suffered from depression, assuming this thread relates to that.

I knew someone who hung himself, the day after he received some bad news. He was never depressed: it was just a particularly traumatic event that he evidently didn't feel he could cope with. Nobody had a clue it was coming.

Don't get me wrong, it's a subject worth debating, but there does seem to be a rush to put this tragedy into the nearest convenient box, when it may not have been so.

 

[Bry Nylon]

there does seem to be a rush to put this tragedy into the nearest convenient box

Slightly unfortunate turn of phrase there.

 

[PaoloRossiJohnson]

We don't actually know that Gary Speed suffered from depression, assuming this thread relates to that.

there does seem to be a rush to put this tragedy into the nearest convenient box, when it may not have been so.

Indeed, I agree - which is why I didn't mention his name in my post.

As I said to you at St. Andrews, you talk a lot of sense!

 

[Goldstone Rapper]

Good point, Edna.

 

[Sergei Gotsmanov]

Weird...I have been talking about depression a lot over the last 2 days having been through it and now coming out the other side.

My plea would be to the friends of people who they suspect may be suffering from depression. For various reasons i didnt recognise that i was depressed and spent a lot of time in denial. A combination of a stressful job, increasing weight, rocketing blood pressure and lack of money caused me to hit rock bottom. To try and make my self feel better I spent money, drank booze and ate food to try to get through it unaware that i was making things worse. Looking back it seems ridiculous that I couldn't understand how i was making things worse but thats how messed up my head was. My GP asked me if i thought i was depressed and I said "no my life is fine". My employer, ironically a local healthcare/insurance company, showed that they were not particularly sympathetic. As a manager I saw the way management spoke about people suffering with depression and it made me shy away from admitting that was my problem. I didn't want to appear weak.

Over the weekend I have found out that my friends all recognised my symptoms and regularly discussed my situation. They we all aware that I was depressed but none of them ever spoke to me for fear of how it might react. I could have tackled my problems so much sooner if someone had the courage to speak to me about it. I know it's a hard subject to raise but this situation is when friends can really make a difference. Luckily redundancy saved me. Although I didn't recognise the depression I knew that I needed to make changes to my life. It gave me an opportunity to make a break from the job and gave me the time to get healthy and lose weight, 5st so far. I'm now doing a job that I enjoy much more, regularly exercise, have regained some confidence and feel much better.

If you suspect a friend may be depressed dont ignore it. If you recognise that you are depressed admit it and get help. Depression can be a very lonely illness that is difficult to understand unless you've been through it but trust me it is every bit as life threatening as cancer etc.

 

[vegster]

Weird...I have been talking about depression a lot over the last 2 days having been through it and now coming out the other side.

My plea would be to the friends of people who they suspect may be suffering from depression. For various reasons i didnt recognise that i was depressed and spent a lot of time in denial. A combination of a stressful job, increasing weight, rocketing blood pressure and lack of money caused me to hit rock bottom. To try and make my self feel better I spent money, drank booze and ate food to try to get through it unaware that i was making things worse. Looking back it seems ridiculous that I couldn't understand how i was making things worse but thats how messed up my head was. My GP asked me if i thought i was depressed and I said "no my life is fine". My employer, ironically a local healthcare/insurance company, showed that they were not particularly sympathetic. As a manager I saw the way management spoke about people suffering with depression and it made me shy away from admitting that was my problem. I didn't want to appear weak.

Over the weekend I have found out that my friends all recognised my symptoms and regularly discussed my situation. They we all aware that I was depressed but none of them ever spoke to me for fear of how it might react. I could have tackled my problems so much sooner if someone had the courage to speak to me about it. I know it's a hard subject to raise but this situation is when friends can really make a difference. Luckily redundancy saved me. Although I didn't recognise the depression I knew that I needed to make changes to my life. It gave me an opportunity to make a break from the job and gave me the time to get healthy and lose weight, 5st so far. I'm now doing a job that I enjoy much more, regularly exercise, have regained some confidence and feel much better.

If you suspect a friend may be depressed dont ignore it. If you recognise that you are depressed admit it and get help. Depression can be a very lonely illness that is difficult to understand unless you've been through it but trust me it is every bit as life threatening as cancer etc.

Good points, well made. We need to lose some of the stigma attached, if we think someone is suffering we should reach out and, if suffering, we have to realise it is not a weakness to ask for help or to talk about things.

 

[Greyrun]

One thought to hang onto when suffering is that it will eventually lift(difficult to believe at the time) and that as descent into depression is a gradual process so is coming out of it.

 

[bhawoddy]

Suffering from depression myself, my message to anyone who suffers is ASK FOR HELP. You will be surprised how many people are going through the same types of problems as you and are the only people that understand what it is like. I have never used antidepressants myself due to my addictive nature but others claim that they have helped enormously.
Please don't feel that you are all alone with no one else to turn to. There is help if you seek it and it works. Your GP will point you in the right direction.

Extremely good advice!

 

[dexter]

does anyone actually know for a fact that gary was depressed and hung himself ?