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Brighton comedienne wins funniest joke at Edinburgh Fringe
- Thread starter Vankleek Hill Seagull
- Start date
The Merry Prankster
Pactum serva
If that's the best joke I am glad I didn't go.
keaton
Big heart, hot blood and balls. Big balls
- Nov 18, 2004
- 9,895
That joke is shit,
The Top 10 funniest jokes from the Fringe
1. Zoe Lyons – "I can't believe Amy Winehouse self-harms. She's so irritating she must be able to find someone to do it for her." (11.65%)
2. Andrew Laurence – "Most of us have a skeleton in the cupboard. David Beckham takes his out in public." (10.10%)
3. Lloyd Langford – "My girlfriend said 'did you know that hippopotamuses kill more people every year than guns?' 'Yes,' I said, 'but a gun is easier to conceal." (9.90%)
4. Josie Long – "When I was a kid I asked my mum what a couple was and she said 'oh, two or three.' And she wonders why her marriage didn't work." (7.35%)
5. Tim Vine – "Velcro. What a rip-off." (6.10%)
6. Stephen Grant – "The Scots invented hypnosis, chloroform and the hypodermic syringe - wouldn't it be easier just to talk to a woman?" (5.80%)
7. Edward Aczel – "So far Bird Flu has only killed 47 people. By the time it ends, it's going to have killed 37 million. It's got to get going, hasn't it, if it's going to be the pandemic we've all been hoping for." (5.60%)
8. Joan Rivers – "Grandchildren can be f**king annoying. How many times can you go 'And the cow goes moo and the pig goes oink'? It's like talking to a supermodel." (3.75%)
9. Tom Stade – "I like Jesus but he loves me, so it's awkward." (3.55%)
10. Jeff Kreisler – "People were outraged because of Barack Obama's spiritual advisor. I think it's great he had one. Who was George Bush's spiritual advisor? Jim Beam? Johnnie Walker? Jack Daniels?" (3.40%)
The Top 10 funniest jokes from the Fringe
1. Zoe Lyons – "I can't believe Amy Winehouse self-harms. She's so irritating she must be able to find someone to do it for her." (11.65%)
2. Andrew Laurence – "Most of us have a skeleton in the cupboard. David Beckham takes his out in public." (10.10%)
3. Lloyd Langford – "My girlfriend said 'did you know that hippopotamuses kill more people every year than guns?' 'Yes,' I said, 'but a gun is easier to conceal." (9.90%)
4. Josie Long – "When I was a kid I asked my mum what a couple was and she said 'oh, two or three.' And she wonders why her marriage didn't work." (7.35%)
5. Tim Vine – "Velcro. What a rip-off." (6.10%)
6. Stephen Grant – "The Scots invented hypnosis, chloroform and the hypodermic syringe - wouldn't it be easier just to talk to a woman?" (5.80%)
7. Edward Aczel – "So far Bird Flu has only killed 47 people. By the time it ends, it's going to have killed 37 million. It's got to get going, hasn't it, if it's going to be the pandemic we've all been hoping for." (5.60%)
8. Joan Rivers – "Grandchildren can be f**king annoying. How many times can you go 'And the cow goes moo and the pig goes oink'? It's like talking to a supermodel." (3.75%)
9. Tom Stade – "I like Jesus but he loves me, so it's awkward." (3.55%)
10. Jeff Kreisler – "People were outraged because of Barack Obama's spiritual advisor. I think it's great he had one. Who was George Bush's spiritual advisor? Jim Beam? Johnnie Walker? Jack Daniels?" (3.40%)
keaton
Big heart, hot blood and balls. Big balls
- Nov 18, 2004
- 9,895
These missed out but are rather good
Arthur Smith – "A man goes to the doctor for his annual check-up. The doctor says, 'I'm afraid you're going to have to stop masturbating.' The man says, why? The doctor says, 'Well, I'm trying to examine you'."
Wil Hodgson – "I don't like the C-word, but if it was done away with, there'd be nothing to call Jim Davidson."
Arthur Smith – "A man goes to the doctor for his annual check-up. The doctor says, 'I'm afraid you're going to have to stop masturbating.' The man says, why? The doctor says, 'Well, I'm trying to examine you'."
Wil Hodgson – "I don't like the C-word, but if it was done away with, there'd be nothing to call Jim Davidson."
beardy gull
Well-known member
I thought that too. Now THAT'S quite funny.
Gully
Monkey in a seagull suit.
I liked number 3, and number 10 at a push, all the rest were pretty lame.
Lord Bracknell
On fire
One of NSC's own gets in the top ten.
Without relying on the handjob gag.
Marvellous scenes.
Without relying on the handjob gag.
Marvellous scenes.
Tooting Gull
Well-known member
- Jul 5, 2003
- 11,033
Braders
Abi Fletchers Gimpboy
Comedy Steve
We're f'ing brilliant
One of NSC's own gets in the top ten.
Without relying on the handjob gag.
Marvellous scenes.
I've retired the handjob gag!
defrocked priest
Father Footy
Tim Vine – "Velcro. What a rip-off." (6.10%)
genius
genius
"I like Jesus but he loves me, so it's awkward."
Superb, Steven Wright-esque
Superb, Steven Wright-esque
Uncle Spielberg
Well-known member
Not as good as the joke in Monty Python that the British Army took over to the Germans that helped us win the second world war. Now that joke was funny.