Annoying things about sleep...

[Easy 10]

I woke up this morning, and discovered that during the night, the top of my ear had folded down on itself, and the weight of my head had kept my ear folded in that position probably all night. Thankfully it sprung straight back into position when I got up, but now its quite red and still very sore. Added to that, a crease on the pillowcase has given me a ginormous "scar" running from my left eye all the way down to my jawline, which makes it look as though I grew up in Glasgow.

I wouldn't normally expect to wake up physically disfigured or in pain, but todays double-whammy has led me to the conclusion that there are some unavoidable downsides to a good nights sleep. Has anyone else woken up to some kind of trauma which was inflicted while you were asleep ?

 

[Marshy]

Ask my wife !

 

[Scarface]

I hate waking to find that my arm is above my head and has gone completely numb. Still only half awake, I try and move it only to bring it crashing down on me. Not the best way to start the day!

 

[Albion Rob]

I hate waking to find that my arm is above my head and has gone completely numb. Still only half awake, I try and move it only to bring it crashing down on me. Not the best way to start the day!

you could turn that into a great start to the day of you knock one out with your eyes closed using that hand. Would be like someone else was doing it.

 

[REDLAND]

I quite often wake up and my willies gone all hard

 

[Muzzman]

I woke up once with an extremely painful shoulder, I could hardly lift my arm and it got to the point where I had to go to A&E as the pain was so bad... Doctors analysis was that I had dislocated my shoulder.

I was fine before I went to bed.

 

[CHAPPERS]

There is nothing annoying about sleep, it's the best!

 

[NMH]

Sorry Easy10, but this is a bad sign that indicates you have a rare sleeping problem called 'Petromortapnea' where you lie frozen, and do not move in the night like normal people

You are likely to die in your sleep. It usually doesn't take long after the initial first signs.

 

[caz99]

sometimes i go to sleep and usually when i am drunk and really tired i dribble, when i wake up its dried and gone a bit crusty thats not nice.

either that or i get poked in the back by something

 

[Easy 10]

I quite often wake up and my willies gone all hard

Good shout.
Why is it blokes often wake up with woodies ? Dunno about you, but I don't even need to have been having an erotic dream to wake up with a stonking great eric. Its often there for no apparent reason.

Still, it stops me rolling out of bed I suppose.

 

[Easy 10]

Sorry Easy10, but this is a bad sign that indicates you have a rare sleeping problem called 'Petromortapnea' where you lie frozen, and do not move in the night like normal people

You are likely to die in your sleep. It usually doesn't take long after the initial first signs.

Oh well.
I've had a good innings.

 

[Norman Baker suck my lozenge]

sometimes when falling asleep on my front I'm unfortunate enough to"get wood"this causes me to wake up in terrible pain thinking that I've proken me knob bone or snapped me banjo string.

 

[Lush]

Good shout.
Why is it blokes often wake up with woodies ? Dunno about you, but I don't even need to have been having an erotic dream to wake up with a stonking great eric. Its often there for no apparent reason.

Still, it stops me rolling out of bed I suppose.

Hmmm. Yes in that poll about "How do you get out of bed" where was the option for pole vault?

Oh - and to caz

 

[Meade's Ball]

The worst thing about sleep in the summer for me is the number of bees that come into my bed and sting me. It's as if they think i have swallowed their queen. Of course, when you get attacked by a bee in your sleep, the human mind convinces itself that it's either cobra or scorpion in the bed.
*scarper*

 

[Easy 10]

The worst thing about sleep in the summer for me is the number of bees that come into my bed and sting me. It's as if they think i have swallowed their queen. Of course, when you get attacked by a bee in your sleep, the human mind convinces itself that it's either cobra or scorpion in the bed.
*scarper*

Are you the Candyman ?

 

[Man of Harveys]

A fine, proud, manly "morning glory" is to prevent you from pissing yourself, I once heard.

 

[Meade's Ball]

Are you the Candyman ?

I'm Candyman the handyman. I do odd-jobs, but am occasionally prone to splitting people from groin to gullet with my hook/drain-clearing device.

 

[Garry Nelson's Left Foot]

Talking of scaring whilst sleeping...

When my friend was about 10 he watched one of the nightmare on elm street movies. In it the kids could only escape Freddy by making themselves wake from their dream. One does this by grabbing hold of a boiling radiator. When the kid wakes he has the big red scar on his hand.
Now, we all know that Freddy isn't remotely scary but bare in mind that my friend was very young. That night he went to bed. Soon he was in the midst of his very own Freddy nightmare. But being a resourcesful young chap he remembered that if he can wake, Freddy couldn't harm him. As luck would have it there was a handy boiling radiator nearby. My friend put his arm down upon the top of the radiator, the searing pain causing him to wake up. And when he did, he saw...





































































A HUGE RED SCAR / BURN running down the length of his forearm!!!

 

[nail-Z]

I think they call it a burn.

 

[captainmorganrum]

either that or i get poked in the back by something

Oooh
....and...
Errrr
....and...
Missus